To kick my neighbours door of :D

[annoyingneighbour]

My neighbour has a little boy, we live in a SHITE new build and he is SCREAMING AGAIN! My poor DD has been in bed for 45 minutes and she cant get to sleep because he is screaming so loud it comes through 2 walls with the door shut 🙄 he used to scream every single night and I heard from another neighbour it was because he was used to being in his mums bed and she was trying to get him out and into his own, THANK GOD it stopped for about a month but its started again the last 3 nights, he also runs up and down and it sounds like a group of elephant are coming through the wall !!!

What makes it 10X worse is she has had words with the neighbour on the other side (terrace) DURING THE MIDDLE OF THE DAY to "turn her music down"

SO AIBU to knock on kick the door of and ask her if she could try and get her son to stop screaming so my poor DD can go to sleep!!!😁

Dear lord the lynching brigade are out tonight op!
You are quite entitled to be annoyed by it. Unfortunately some parents seem to be able to zone out to crying and screaming! My own sister could read a newspaper and not hear her own kids mustering each other! x

I think this poor woman needs support not criticising. Pop round and ask her if shes ok. Do not criticise her. She is probably at her witts end. My youngest was a nightmare to go into his own bed. It takes time to change their routine. Offering support or go online find some tips that she might not know and say have you tried this...... i hear it helps to soothe them easier. Be productive rather than make her feel like shes failing.

I was going to leave some kind words of support, but reading the replies you've left since your OP, I don't feel the kindness.

Look, there's obviously trouble next door and perhaps the mum comes across snotty because she's actually embarrassed about the night screaming, and/ or any number of things.

I was that parent with the screaming baby/toddler/child. At nearly eight, she is only just being seen by an ed psych because her new school are seeing the cracks.

Go round there, ask if it's OK to come in and talk. Ask her if everything is OK and does she want any help or support with her little one because you are hearing the screaming and you know she must be frustrated and exhausted.

I'm pretty sure this will help a lot.

Oh, my favourite. Another smug mum. You know, OP, you could make an absolute mint if you sell your five-minute trick to all of us incompetent mothers out here who weren't blessed with your maternal mastery.

I have a nighttime screamer. As a result, I'm financially, mentally, physically and emotionally exhausted because after years of trying everything even you in your infinite wisdom could ever suggest to try it's come to light there is.no.solution. That's right. Sometimes, there is.no.solution. But time. And compassion from others. Shame the poor woman won't get any of the latter from her neighbour.

Oh STFU you morbid lot,

saw the mum this morning on my way out he was screaming again so took all of your GREAT advise and asked if he was ok as I had heard him crying in the night her response

"Yeah he is right, its cause I put a stair gate on his room so leave him to it now cant sleep with him in my bed"

So thankfully her son doesn't have SN she is just a CUNT, Have a great day everyone 😁

Oh well, I guess you were right all along then

@mclaleli no I don't think I am right I think he has attachment problems that his mum isn't recognising, my niece is 4 and would also scream all night if she was locked in a room all night she HAS to sleep with DM

You were not right at all. I guess you missed the tone of my post.

And to call her a cunt

Wow. You’re a charmer.

Neighbours noise can drive the most sane of us mad. I recommend a white noise machine at night - works wonders for us. It's a bit weird the first night but you get used to it from then on in. A bit too used to it - ours. Ours comes everywhere with us!

And to call her a cunt

Well she is a bit. Should OP just wait for him to learn no one is coming?

Its not right to leave children in a room to scream and scream all night and offer them no comfort. Why is this woman being defended when all the cry it out/sleep threads are full of
I would NEVER let my child cry for more than 5mins
Its dangerous to let them cry & cry Etc

"Yeah he is right, its cause I put a stair gate on his room so leave him to it now cant sleep with him in my bed"

When DS first started having sleep issues this was the same advice given to me by the HV and GP - put a stairgate on his door to keep him safely contained and to prevent him going wandering in the night. The reasoning being that in the absence of other options he would just get into bed. Does it not occur to you that she is probably following similar advice?

So thankfully her son doesn't have SN

You still don't know that, she hasn't told you that he doesn't have SN and is under no obligation to tell you if he does.

I think he has attachment problems

You're not the least bit qualified to make that diagnosis.

my niece is 4 and would also scream all night if she was locked in a room all night she HAS to sleep with DM

So? This isn't about your niece.

she is just a CUNT

Takes one to know one.

This woman is being defended against the abuse thrown at her by her neighbour.
I'd love to hear what the neighbour has to say, because I somehow don't imagine our OP lives a life of quiet and well mannered sobriety.

And to call her a cunt

Well she is a bit. Should OP just wait for him to learn no one is coming?

You literally have no idea that this is actually what is happening though. All you have is an irate OP calling her neighbour a cunt. It's unlikely OP is providing a neutral account of what's happening.

There's not a lot she can do to stop it. She's probably hoping her neighbours understand that we were all babies once

You literally have no idea that this is actually what is happening though. All you have is an irate OP calling her neighbour a cunt. It's unlikely OP is providing a neutral account of what's happening.

the woman told her that's what she's doing, this morning - and the OP has ears. And her own child that can't sleep because of what this woman is doing..

I’m curious as to how you manage to stop your child from screaming after 5 minutes. What’s your technique?

I beg to differ @Eliza997. The OP posted a question about whether she’s being unreasonable about kicking her neighbour’s door down. The majority of us, it seems, believe she is being unreasonable but she’s responded by calling us “morbid” and telling us to STFU. She’s not considering anything anyone has said. At all. She is also calling her neighbour she admitted she knows very little about a “cunt”. She is not a listener.

If we are to take the OP’s word for it, it still doesn’t mean her neighbour is leaving her child to cry. My child cries irrespective of what I do. In the room. Out of the room. Doesn’t matter. You know why? Not all kids are the same. I’ll say it again so you get it. Not all kids are the same. And they’re not robots you can switch off when you’re tired of them.

I don’t believe in cry it out either, but sleep deprivation makes people desperate and it is a desperate measure so if she actually does use CIO, I understand. Sometimes it may be the only thing that works. Who knows. The OP knows nothing about the child or the mother, but is happy to make a whole lot of assumptions about them anyway.

"My child does still have tantrums, plenty of them, she is almost 3 with a speech delay and very often has break downs when she cant get me or her dad to understand what she wants or needs, but like I said I sort it within 5 mins not to disturb the neighbours"

So what would you do if you had a child who couldn't be "sorted" in 5 minutes because once they went into meltdown they didn't care what you did?

I did try to make dd's problems a little more manageable by letting her into our bed, but the HV was very disapproving and basically implied I was damaging her.

@Rockmeamaryllis give her whatever she wants probably.

Think you're the bees knees don't you OP? You sound very young and immature yet judgemental. Not a good look

the woman told her that's what she's doing, this morning - and the OP has ears. And her own child that can't sleep because of what this woman is doing..

Oh well, that's a wrap then. There couldn't possibly another side, a different view or an alternative interpretation.

@Rockmeamaryllis dummy, juice cup, check nappy, cuddles.. still crying? Take her downstairs and put the tv on quietly she will usually fall back to sleep within 20 mins if I am lucky , I very much struggle with my DD's sleep and have asked for advice on here myself but i stay up with her all night playing if she doesn't sleep, I don't leave her to cry in her room which DOES have a stair gate on it btw as otherwise she would also run round all night...

@corythatwas I would apologise to the neighbours and tell them why she is crying and keeping them up all night. Or at least say hi back to them...

@whitesoxx yes I'm actually 16, because I don't like my DC being kept awake all night it makes me a young immature girl doesn't it.

Think some people on this thread need to grow up with the sad responses.

No that doesn't make you immature. But all the "sweet, hun and thank you next" stuff makes you sound like a teenager playing at grown ups