To be massively pissed off?

[Fedup198]

My son is 26. He has 2 kids with one ex and another on the way with new gf in a few weeks.

Him and new gf asked could they stay with me for 3 months, various reasons given. On the understanding they save and get their own place. They live for free (buy their own food) he has never had his own place. Him and gf’s always flit between relatives.

They are lazy, don’t clean up after themselves or the kids at weekends, despite my constant telling them to. Think piles of washing up, scum in the bath, mess all over the worktops, plates left everywhere etc.

He has just been sacked from his job, his own fault. They have no savings, despite living here for free. As he has decided to start his own company and spend all savings on that and holidays, weekends away, flash cars which are then repossessed, designer clothes etc.

Their 3 months is up. They have made no effort to save or even look for a place. I’m sick to death of keep ‘nagging’ them about responsibility and priorities etc.

Would I be unreasonable to tell them they have to leave? With a baby due in a few weeks, no credit, no saving etc?

They are still not back and I’m going to bed. They don’t have a key.

single that is actually how it feels! Like I am an inconvenience to them! It’s not my home anymore. I watch TV in my room, like I’m a lodger!

I will be putting my foot down and giving them notice. Thank you all again.

Well done, OP. And make sure you stick to it!

Good for you OP, you can't be made to feel like this in your own home. They have a rent free home with a free maid and nanny, no bloody wonder they want to stay.

Jeez they really don’t give a shit about you at all do they. Don’t answer the door when they finally turn up tonight! They will sort something else out. They need to learn a lesson somehow

OP don't lie awake worrying whether they can get in or not. They caused this problem, not you. Hope you have a good night's stress free sleep . After all you have done for them you don't deserve this horrible treatment.

Why would they want to move into accommodation that they would have to pay for when they can live with yourent free and have you scivvying after them constantly. Get a grip woman and pack their bags. They can get homeless accommodation from the council. They call them scatter flats in this area.

They need to move out whether they want to or not, and you need to tell them this when they return to your house.
I don't see any benefit in giving them another week or two, as it sounds as though they'll just carry on not bothering to organise anything for themselves.
I would tell them they need to move out on Monday. Don't do it at the end of the week as the council offices won't be open for them to present themselves as homeless. They will probably need a letter from you evicting them.
As a previous poster has said, maybe you could offer some support by having the grandchildren overnight- maybe just every other weekend at your home with perhaps just your son staying over to look after them. His girlfriend could be there in the day and but return to their own accomodation to sleep.
Stand your ground. It will be better for your son and his children in the long run.

Just echoing everyone else OP. They behave this way because they have been getting away with it. Time for you to put your own well-being first. Good luck.

When and if they came back to your house last night shows their total disregard and disrespect of you and your other DC.
When you spoke to them before they flounced off they should have apologized, been grateful, thankful, humble. You shouldn't be doing any housework.....they are living there free and helping in the house should be your 'rent' at the very least.
26 years old, 2 children, another on the way, useless girlfriend, no money, no job. That's his responsibility, His choice. NOT YOURS.
I'm so sorry for you. I hope today you find the strength to say no and go to them. Bringing a new baby into your house and all that entails is completely unacceptable.
Good luck, be strong. You sound so lovely.

Hi OP. I hope you have managed to get some sleep. What an awful situation. I do feel for you. I can see easily how these situations creep up on you. I am stunned they have suggested you move into the box room.

I know your son is dead against council houses/housing association but what about working on his girlfriend? Does she really want to be living like this with a new baby? Doesn't she want her own home? Perhaps try to convince her? I really don't see what other choice they have? Why are they being so snobbish about it?

My friend had this with her adult step son. His girlfriend threw him out and he was supposed to be sleeping on her sofa for two months to save for a deposit. Six months in he hadn't saved a penny and was getting more and more abusive. Eventually, she began to charge him rent - but she saved the it and when she had enough for a deposit and two months rent she presented him with a local paper and said she would pay for a deposit and two months rent but she would only pay the agency and not give her step son the money as he would blow it on flashy nights out.

It sounds like a horrendous situation

Don't throw them out on a Friday. Throw them out on a Monday instead. The problem of a Friday is that many places that they could turn to are closed at the weekend.