I honestly thought this was a piss take.

[Cavanchezmode]

Menfest. I shit you not.

menfest.org/

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll ah is that what it’s called? I call it, being an arsehole to get your point across because you disagree with mine. I’m just as entitled to my opinion as you are.

I just feel like these sort of events will attract MRA’s and I’m sure a lot will go with the intention of ‘coverting’ vulnerable men to their ideology. Hopefully I’m wrong.

And if you book a ticket you're asked if you would like to contribute to an Angel Ticket fund which is then used to pay for someone who normally wouldn't be able to attend through lack of funds.

I can't see the problem to be honest. They aren't encroaching on my life or causing disruption to others, they aren't getting tanked up, drugged up and seem to be just about sharing ideas, working out how to be better men and using skills in crafts or cooking to teach others. My DH used to belong to a club for dads and kids when DS was younger - there was a young father there who had been widowed with two young boys and he was really struggling. He couldn't even organise a birthday party for his young boy. The men rallied round and showed him what needed to be done. He's working well with his kids now and has access to help. He's white, owns his own home. Does that mean he doesn't need help when he loses his partner and has two kids under 5 to support? I fail to see the issue with men supporting men to become better men.

It’s just a hippy mens festival. Plus they are donating half the proceeds to calmzone which is a really good charity. We have a community centre locally (we’re not far from menfest actually ) that runs a ‘men’s shed’ for (mostly) older men to get together and do practical things. Are you not ok with an initiative like this either?

Presumably this is a fully inclusive event? Can ALL men attend? Even those that are female?
Yes. It's pretty far down in the 'Important Information', but they have the obligatory "We're ever so woke!" statement:
exploring Healthy Masculine means discussing and embracing the equality, power and relevance of the Feminine, too. To this end, if you resonate with the label ‘Man’, have been living as such and are keen to contribute to this conversation… no matter your age, size, sexuality, physical ability, ethnicity or religious beliefs, YOU are welcome.
and
We are inclusive of trans men and non-binary folk who have identified as men
Personally I think this is a greatidea - we're always telling men to organise their own single-sex events; now they're actually
doing one we should be cheering them on.
Though I do wonder how they'll react if they get a self-IDed male with breasts and a 'man vulva' sitting in the spa with them!

How did you come across this festival OP?

I see this has been asked a couple of times and I'm REALLY curious as well. Care to enlighten us OP? Thank you for sharing btw, I've passed it on.

Did you post this on the wrong board by any chance OP?

Tinyteatime We have a Mens Shed in our area as well. It's not just a social club, they make quite a few things (like toys and seats) for charity as well. They're not exclusively male either; a female friend of mine has just joined them so that she can learn some carpentry, and she says it's a nice friendly group.

Are men fucked over by the patriarchy too?

Vulpine... yes. Massively so. Patriarchy hurts everybody.

I think it's great... Really don't understand why it's taking the piss, there's women only ones too. Equality works both ways.

Can I just recommend the film Swimming With Men. It is really insightful into men doing something typically associated with women, whilst looking at how men of all ages suffer with things in their lives they can't or don't want to talk about. It feels like some of the posters on this thread could do with that reminder.

I think it's a brilliant idea. Love the Angel ticket too.

Can I just recommend the film Swimming With Men

Yes to this!^ saw this a couple of weeks ago! Wonderful film.

Thank you @springbreak3. This kind of stuff makes me so angry. As a mum of boys and sister to 3 awesome brothers (who are often more feminist than me ) I get so pissed off with the sneering anti-men narrrative on here.

Of course men are affected negatively by modern society - and as other posters have said, if we want to address “toxic masculinity” we have to address it many different ways. Men getting together to support each other is surely something to be applauded?

Oh look I’m so cool I can use the word “woke”. So over it.

@planesinthesky.

Perhaps. I think it's a very complex issue and there is no straightforward solution.

Statistically men are more violent than women so it should hardly be surprising that men statistically opt for a more violent method of suicide. I actually think it could be a combination of both being more likely to be violent and being pushed over the edge.

I actually attempted suicide late last year. I wasn't looking for attention. I certainly didn't want help. I wanted to die and I would have done anything to achieve that. I remembered that when I was saved and when I realised it was DP who had found me I was super pissed and refused to speak to him! I was actually hospitalised straight after and admitted to a psych ward so obviously the HCP's understood that I was serious in my attempt.

Naturally I do take issue with the claim that a less violent method automatically = less serious or just looking for help. Perhaps in some cases that is what they are aiming for but like I said It's not black and white.

I consider myself staunchly feminist but I don't see being feminist as being completely anti men.

I have a brother, uncles, nephews, cousins and male friends who are fantastic supportive, kind, sensible men.

My brother was at one point a newly rp single dad, I've lost 2 old school friends inc an old boyfriend to suicide, another was lost to male violence having been attacked upon peacefully leaving a pub one night, his attacker thought he gave him a "dirty look" as he left the pub even though they'd never met never had any interaction at all.

Toxic masculinity/patriarchy is just as harmful to men as it is to women.

This looks like a good if somewhat restrictive event (in terms of who it's likely to appeal to).

If we want to achieve true equality, to rid ourselves of toxic masculinity we need to not only challenge the destructive men we need to support the constructive ones.

Yes pisspawpatrol that’s a brilliant film.

I’m sorry QueenOfTheTofuTree, I hope you’ve found some peace or hope or whatever you needed. It’s definitely a complex issue.

I tried to point out earlier in thread that statistics show women actually attempt suicide more than men. All dreadfully sad but I think another sad narrative is that because it’s seen as a male problem it gets a lot of attention however, I’m of course not saying it shouldn’t get attention but that women should too. Female suicide attempts are never discussed or seen as an issue.

I have 3 sons, 4 brothers and an amazing Dad. I’m not ‘anti men’, I just worry that there will be vulnerable ‘normal’ men who attend and there may be MRA types who use these things to prey on such men. Ultimately, it’s a complex issue!

Dear me. What a horrible attitude. Am thinking this is the kind of thing my dad would have benefitted from. A space to talk, off load, be himself without fear of recrimination. Sadly too late.

OP, seriously, this has nothing to do with the so called patriarchy. It has everything to do with being human, and trying to be kind to yourself. Let people be themselves. I hardly think such a gathering is of any threat to anyone.

Have my first

I'm doing much better now thanks @NKFell . Like I said I was so angry when DP found me. I was angry at him for finding me and calling for help. I was angry at myself for being such a failure that I couldn't even kill myself without fucking up especially when I thought I'd planned everything out so there was no way it could fail.

Ultimately though I'm glad that my attempt failed and I am so grateful DP woke up when he did and realised something was seriously wrong when he couldn't get in the bathroom and I wasn't answering him.

I do think that suicide attempts are not taken anywhere near as seriously as they should be and they are often dismissed as just being a cry for help. I do know I am grateful that the staff in the hospital that night took my attempt seriously because I just know if they hadn't and had sent me on my way that I would have done it again and made sure I didn't fail.

Of all the man-specific events or spaces, the one you choose to ridicule is one tackling toxic masculinity?

Ok

There is nothing wrong with this, stop looking for issues that aren't there. You don't solve discrimination problems with more discrimination, leave them be FFS.

Besides, you can just you feel like a man and go along and join in. The modern world is wonderful, isn't it?

Ah so because men have privilege they cant get together?

You wanna ban anything where lots of men get together?

Actually I think this is just what they should have. Something not based around stereotypical 'Male behaviours'

Yes men as a group are privileged. That doesnt mean on an individual level they dont face issues. They dont have struggles, mental health issues, loneliness.

The toxic masculinity we have society damages individual men as much as women.

Our sons are growing up in a world that tells them there is only one way to 'manly'and to 'man up.

This shot hasnt helped anyone so far, men or women. So maybe, just maybe this sort of thing is better for everyone.

Seems the OP has flounced. Not posted since about half six last night. (Also the 2 or 3 posters that were supporting her have gone quiet...)

Nothing else to say @Cavanchezmode ? 😬

Are you shocked and embarrassed that 95% of the posters don't agree with you?

@StitchingMoss

Thank you springbreak. This kind of stuff makes me so angry. As a mum of boys and sister to 3 awesome brothers (who are often more feminist than me shock) I get so pissed off with the sneering anti-men narrative on here.

You're welcome

Of course men are affected negatively by modern society - and as other posters have said, if we want to address “toxic masculinity” we have to address it many different ways. Men getting together to support each other is surely something to be applauded.

Agree totally.

It's a bit hippy like isn't it! Sadly not DHs cup of tea.

Apparently there will be Dick Pic booth area. Is the black tent to go and be grumpy in?

I think this is fantastic.

I honestly can't see any downsides to a positive event for men to get together. In fact I think it's entirely sexist to suggest that it's not OK, but to value women only events.

Men have their own issues to face, and it can only be a good thing to provide a safe space for them. If anyone doubts that, just compare suicide rates between men and women.