To ask what makes your life fulfilling?

[Subla2401]

Growing up, I had a hobby which required many hours a week training. I also spent a lot of time with family on days out etc. I was always busy, what with school, friends, family and my hobby.

Now I'm an adult, I'm finding that life isn't as fulfilling as it used to be. I work around 55 hours a week in a job I enjoy, but it is all-consuming. I feel like since I left university 5 years ago, my life has been a bit flat. I try to make the most of any time off, but then end up frustrated if I don't have plans because it feels like I've wasted precious free time.

So, what things do you do in your free time that make life enjoyable? Activities or hobbies? Even if it's just little luxuries, I'd love to hear.

My kids, my one and only interest in life (call me boring, I don't mind)

Spending time with my beautiful dog, I don’t feel like I have to fill time doing stuff or going out these days, I enjoy the simple things now, I enjoy running and taking in nature, spending time on my home making it look lovely, settling down on a Saturday night with dog on my lap, good box set and a pizza! Nothing terribly exciting but it makes me happy and content. 15 years ago I would have been chomping at the bit to go clubbing on Saturday night but now I am at a different life stage and it’s lovely. Sounds like you work very hard OP if I was working all those hours don’t think I would leave the sofa when I had free time! If life feels a bit flat maybe you need a goal to work towards, getting fitter, joining a running club or something like that perhaps?

My children and my pets.

Also, I own a caravan and I love going away for weekends in it. To some totally random places, some of my best times have been spent on the caravan weekends.

I took up sewing when I felt like this! Sewing, crochet, writing, singing in a choir. Creative things that make you feel alive 😊

My daughter. Friends without kids all seem to be taking up doing triathalons.

I've wasted precious free time.

But why is it wasted? Did you do something restorative? Something useful? Something pleasurable? Relaxing? Or stare silently at the wall feeling frustrated you weren't doing anything?

Does every moment of life have to be scheduled out with goals and plans, or can you live in the moment and take pleasure from the simpler everyday activities rather than always being busy busy? Can you only be happy when you reach the end result of a project, or can you find happiness every step of the way there - if you even get there? ("Postponing happiness" - e.g. "I'll be happy when I get promoted")

You might feel differently about it if you reframed it a little and shifted your focus. And I say that as someone who used to feel similarly.

Mindfulness and/or some of the ideas from Buddhism about living in the moment might change how you feel more than searching for projects to fill your every waking moment.

How do you feel sitting in the sunshine eating your breakfast on a weekend? Do you pause to take it in and appreciate the pleasure of the moment or are you focused on the next big plan and rushing through this one to reach it?

No need to answer, just trying to illustrate what I mean.

I really enjoy my job, I know that sounds crazy but I love being at work. . I also enjoy volunteering & hopefully making a difference to my local community ... and I am also very happy spending time on my own.

I wouldn’t say being a mother and wife are particularly fulfilling for me , I find both roles pretty relentless and not necessarily rewarding.

Working on my allotment. Just spent the whole day pottering about planting potatoes & peas, planning the next things. I'm now tired and looking forward to my bed.

Work
Family
Volunteering
Generally making a difference.

Have you thought about volunteering / passing on some of your expertise to youngsters who do the hobby you used to do ?