To ask what you will do when your kids leave home?

[Mangetoutrodney]

I love being a mum & will do anything for my kids. I do find it tiring though esp working full time & the weight of responsibility of raising 2 small people (they are 7 & 11). I try to cherish every moment though.

When I have an empty nest, i’d love to take another gap year. I have been lucky to have had 2 in my life before to travel extensively and I miss it. I think I am a wanderer at heart & am not bothered by material stuff. So that’s what I hope to do (health etc permitting) - to wander again for a year.

Aibu to ask what you would like to do?

(I’m not wishing my life away- just dreaming a bit when the routine gets to me a bit!!)

Sleep, read, dog walk, travel.... but that’s all nonsense as I’ll be 53 when DC3 reaches end of A level age so I’ll be bloody working still. And I expect around uni age they’ll be bouncing back home a bit. Long uni summer, working before gap years, post uni saving up maybe. Realistically with three DC, what are the chances they will all properly leave at 18?

I would just love not to be a taxi and atm machine for a while, would be so nice.

Maybe I will finally declutter my house and plant a vegetable garden. Plus possibly spend a couple of months abroad over the winter.

See if I can remember how to have slightly noisy sex. We moved last year from a small cottage to a much larger property but I can’t really remember how to make a sound. We have had only the occasional night away from them in 18 years and so I really have been having hushed sex in all that time.
Also going to drive across the USA in a Bill Bryson kind of way.
And crying. I think there will be lots of crying.

Sleep and have more sex. Do a bit more gardening. Probably spend a lot of time thinking about them and hoping they are alright.

Do a Happy Dance

I know that my anxiety will ramp up to 9000 without them so probably wouldn’t be able to do much 🤷‍♀️

It’s obviously sad to say out loud, but they are my life. I wish I put more time and thought into myself and my own life but I had my eldest when I was young so I never really grew into myself. All I know is being a mum

Dd is 14 and ds is 5, I am 41.

Have warned dd already that I am eying up her room as an office. Well ds room but he will have dds room when she goes to uni. Will keep small room with a bed/wardrobe/desk but use it as an office when dd not here.

When ds leaves home I will be at least 54/55. So probably just the same as now. Work/eat/sleep/repeat.

Probably read more. Eat more grown up food. Throw less fruit away because I wont feel obliged to buy as much. Buy fewer biscuits maybe. Not have as many variety of crisps or cereals in.

I'll also be 55 and am thinking that I need to get down the gym NOW to make sure I'm fit enough when they finally move out to go travelling!

I will be devastated when they go. So will definitely have to gone up with some fun stuff to do

SausageAndEgg I feel the same- my kids are and always have been my life. They are now both at uni and though it’s strange at first and of course you still worry, you don’t worry on a DAILY basis, more generally about the way their lives are going. This frees up at lot of your time and I have now become more selfish when they’re not around. I’ve never had any time for me.

When they’re home though for holidays I love it and still worry about them eating their veg! I guess the ol’ saying Out of sight out of mind- but never out of my heart.

I'm going round to their houses and leaving the doors open, the lights on in all the rooms, the TV on, the gas on and the freezer door just slightly ajar

Get myself a horse.

And maybe some chickens.

Get divorced.

Mine are on the brink- one at University, one adult age.
I run a small business from home, looking forward to ramping that up , I will exercise more, spend more time with OH.

Go on lots of cheap holidays during term time!

I will finally leave their dad !

Think I'll be turning 47 when my youngest would be off to uni, though I'm not sure what the future holds for either of mine. My eldest wants the kind of vocation you go to uni for, and my youngest just talks about babies and I sincerely hope she doesn't pin her aspirations solely on leaving school to have babies.

And I don't know what I'll do.