Was my friend BU about this person parking over her driveway?

[cantbebotheredtoday]

I went to visit my friend the other day, call her H. As I was coming up to her house I noticed a car was half over her driveway, so as my friends car was parked in the driveway I had to park half in and half out her driveway, the back of my car was sticking out onto the road since the other car was blocking me from getting into the free space in her driveway.

Anyway, as I was getting out my car, a woman with her daughter (she had just picked her up from school and that's why she had parked there) came up to me, looking quite flustered and said "I'm really sorry, I'm just moving." I just replied it's okay as I hate confrontation and she had apologised.

I get to my friends door and H comes to the door and was like, "look at that woman parked over my drive" I told her she had apologised, H then proceeded to go up to the woman and say, "could you watch where you are parking in future as people can't get in and out my driveway" the woman replied that she had said sorry and H then said, "that's not the point, it's my driveway!" And stormed away. The woman then apologised again.

I'm just wondering if I am being unreasonable in thinking my friend was being a bit unreasonable. The woman had apologised and was affronted, I just think my friend over reacted but maybe I'm wrong. Personally unless I needed out of my driveway, it's not something I would get upset or worked up about. But I also wouldn't park over someone's driveway, partially or not.

Thoughts?

If my drive kept getting blocked by people who said sorry it would wear thin. I'd hear 'sorry, not sorry.'

Find somewhere more considerate to park!? There was no where else, her street is packed during school run times so there was no where else

Highly unlikely. There might not have been anywhere else in that road, but it's massively unlikely that that is the only place within a mile that she could park.

TO get back to the original point, your friend was not unreasonable. She may have needed to leave before the cf woman got back. Driving and parking can get so bad outside schools from entitled parents, it can become dangerous and a police issue. It needs dealing with before it becomes the norm to abandon your car.

OP, if your only reply to the woman was it's okay, then she might have assumed you lived there and that she was ok to do the same again. The problem is you weren't speaking on behalf of your friend, who clearly felt very differently. You could have told the woman that you were visiting, and whilst it wasn't a problem for you, you couldn't speak for your friend.

So what if the woman was "sorry". You do realise she was sorry in a sorry not sorry kind of way. She probably does it every day. Your friend was not being unreasonable at all. Why should she have to put up with people presumably blocking her drive on a daily basis.

I am mystified why you are so concerned about a random woman!

I don't blame your friend. Many people think it's ok,....just for a few minutes. It's not. If they get a firm reaction they would think twice next time, hopefully.
It's bloody annoying that the person whose driveway is being. blocked gets called unreasonable for not putting up with it.

I can understand this woman's anger and frustration. I used to live in a house not far from a primary school, a Church, AND a small parade of shops. On a daily basis, I was prevented from getting into my drive AND out of it, because of inconsiderate, thoughtless arseholes parking directly opposite my drive, and also on the same side (a couple of feet over my driveway opening.) SOME people lived a ten to fifteen minute walk away, but were too bone idle to walk, and chose to drive, (to the school, or shops, or Church,) and block my access in and out of my driveway.

I lost count of the amount of times I had to walk 150 to 250 feet to my front door with heavy bags of shopping, (and I had to do it 4 or 5 times - there and back - to get everything I needed out of the car as I couldn't carry it all at once,) because of selfish thoughtless individuals stopping me parking on my driveway.

Doesn't sound a great distance, but it is when you're carrying heavy bags of shopping, and you have to do the journey 5 or 6 times to get everything out of your car! Then when they had gone, I had to go back down the road and get my car and park it on the driveway!

Thankfully, I now live in a place where it doesn't happen, as it's a cul de sac with only 12 houses, and we all have 3 and 4 car drives, a garage, long, wide gardens, and a lot of room between the houses. It's also a wider road than the one my old house was in.

But yeah, when you have to tolerate people stopping you from getting in and out of your drive, (on a daily basis,) you do tend to get very pissed off!

Unfortunately most parents who drive their kids to schools park like arseholes. And I say that as some who drives 1 child to school and back every day. But in the morning they open the 'spare' car park for drop off and yet most parents drop off on double/zig zag line. It's actually quicker to drop off in car park and leave but that would involve their child walking an extra 100 metres. And when I pick her up I park outside her friends house about 4 roads away.

I suspect the driver 'accidentally' parks over someone driveway every day.

My mum lives next to the primary school my younger 2 go too, and she had to get gates fitted so parents didn't park on her drive. But every day it's bedlam with the way parents park along the road. Unfortunately where they park they block a junction and there is another school on so we have to deal with parents 'parking' and blocking the roads up for 2 schools.

And god forbid the weather bad then you see what havoc these entitled parents create.

Oh and I no longer live close to a school, or a Church, or any bloody shops.

I know someone who has this day in day out, near a school. It's rude to do it. I'm with your friend.

Friend not unreasonable at all, amazing how many parents just have to park half way across a drive to collect their child. No way could they have bothered to find somewhere else to park.

This cul-de-sac with no pavement and full of parents dropping off and picking up sounds like a nightmare. It’s a wonder no one has been knocked over.

No, I don’t think your friend was unreasonable. The woman knew she shouldn’t have parked there but did so anyway. An apology after the fact doesn’t cut it. Your friend probably has to put up with this several times a week so is justified in being pissed of.

Your friend was totally not BU. The lady who parked blocking her drive was BU. School parking wars cause a lot of distress for some residents who have to face this twice a day, 5 days a week, so I do not blame your friend for speaking to that woman in that way.

Can your friend take pics of people parking across her drive and post them on her local facebook page? That has been the most effective way of stopping churchgoers parking on people's drives around us.

You're more supportive of some rude, inconsiderate woman than your friend? I really hope your friend sees this and realises what a drip of a 'friend' she has in you. 'I hate confrontation' usually = some sucker of a walkover whom people mess about all their lives. You would have sat and waited for some random to move?! Wow. Say, I'm really skint now, can you give me some money if I say 'sorry'? YABVU.

I'm betting this is not the first time someone has parked across her drive. so she was not being unreasonable in her response. Some parents can be utter CFs about parking. She was actually committing an offence by even partially blocking your friends drive. Unfortunately, so were you by partially blocking the street in sticking out into the road. But I'd have done the same tbh.

The only thing that woman was sorry about was being caught out. Anyone would have known it’s totally unreasonable to partly block someone’s drive. Her apology was meaningless. Your friend was not BU.

I think the OP is getting s hard time here. Had the woman not parked over the bloody drive, then OP could have got onto it. So the unreasonable person here was the woman. People do it to me all the time and it drives me absolutely mental. I called the police one time and they took it seriously and were just about to come and remove the van when the owner turned up and had a go at me for calling the police . Self centred isn’t even the word.

She was in the wrong for blocking the drive, but you were equally in the wrong for blocking the road.

Just because someone has done something wrong, doesn't mean you can do something just as wrong because it's convenient!

Having a sore ankle doesn't mean the rules of the road don't apply to you.

I think the OP is getting s hard time here. Had the woman not parked over the bloody drive, then OP could have got onto it.

Yes, but the woman was there, so OP should have parked somewhere else, not parked illegally and blocked the road.

Two wrongs don't make a right.

I just think my friend over reacted but maybe I'm wrong. Personally unless I needed out of my driveway, it's not something I would get upset or worked up about.

The whole point is that the person parking across the drive has no idea if the owner needs or doesn't need access to their drive, either routinely or in an emergency arose.

Not saying anything is taken by CFs as permission.

In this situaton though you have declared that you have had recent surgery and couldn't park in a nearby street so this was a situation in which access to the driveway was needed! You got round the problem by parking in a really odd manner ( and yes I have read and fully understand that your car did not extend into the road by more than the width of cars parked in the standard fashion)

I live by a large primary school and it is a daily pain in the arse with people being inconsiderate in the way they park.

I was given a proper rollicking by someone for parking over their driveway once. It was quite scary and I did think he overreacted, not for telling me off but for all the shouting which was very intimidating and quite frightening. Was her child with her?

Having said that, I was completely U for parking there! I deserved to be told off, just not in that threatening manner (IMO). I hadn’t actually realised I had done it, it was a mistake. Lesson learned - it has made me much more careful about where I park now and considerate of people’s houses near school etc. (But I still think he was a bit U!)