To let Dd walk at 6.00am?

[Tartanwarrior]

My daughter is 17, and works as a dot.com shopper on Saturday and Sunday mornings. She's been doing this job since Nov, and I have driven her every time so far. It's light now at 6, it's about a 10- 15 minute walk, and can be done on a well lit road beside a fairly busy road. I so want a lie in, but I feel guilty/ worried etc. I'm a single parent, and she isn't close to driving yet. Am I unreasonable to make her walk?

Oh dear god.
She is 17! That’s an adult near as damn it.
It’s a 15 minute walk, that’s not even a mile.
Unless it is torrential rain she can damn well walk it.

Why is this even a question?

YANBU at all. At 17 my parents didn't drive me anywhere unless it was absolutely necessary. She's fine to walk to work.

The clocks go forwards next week (on mothers day!) So will it be dark again?

I was living on my own at 17, getting myself to and from college and travelling up and down the country on my own doing uni interviews - she'll be fine!

Of course it is okay to do this! Is it your DD that thinks you're being unreasonable? A 15 minute walk is nothing, she'd have to if you didn't drive! My parents have never been able to drive so I've always walked or got the bus since I was at high school.

My daughter goes to work at a similar time on Sunday mornings and until now I have been taking her. Sunday mornings feel like a more dangerous time than weekday mornings - few people are about and there's very little traffic. She has to pass through a dodgy area to get to work which is a 30 min walk.

However I physically cannot take her at the moment due to injury and she is walking. She says it's fine - but I feel like the OP. It doesn't feel safe to me.

She is also 17

She will probably take a taxi when the clocks go forwards.

In my mid twenties, I had a job which I walked to,(45min), with a 7am start. Sometimes it was at weekends, which definitely felt a little bit less safe... the only people walking about looked like they had been out all night. They were usually friendly enough though, (probably pissed). But I do get why you’d worry a little.

My mother was the ultimate mollycoddler but even she didn’t drive me to work for the 6am start I had when I was 18 - you are definitely ok to have a lie in!

Unless you live in a very dodgy area then I can't see the problem. It's light, there's a safe pavement alongside a busy road and she's got the physical capacity to do it. Why is it even a question?

Those saying that their youngsters did/do paper rounds at that time of the morning - around here, taking up a paper round seems to mean getting mum to drive you around in the car - which with all the stopping and starting probably costs more in fuel and wear and tear than the youngster earns on the paper round - and we live in a village where the rounds are all within safe walking distance (adults do the wider area in a vehicle) where the crime rate is exceptionally low and in the 27 years I've lived here I've never heard of anyone being attacked or abducted on the streets! Words fail me!

Even if it's dark, it's still fine. In the winter it's dark for a lot of the day. As someone else said, cycling would be even better if the roads aren't stupidly busy.

I get that you're questioning this because of the time of day. Walking somewhere alone at six am is different from, say 9am. Just as walking alone at 9pm is different from 6pm. There are fewer people around generally- and especially fewer families and this can make it feel less safe.
So, I know many MNetters seems to expect their children to do their own laundry, cooking and transport as soon as they turn 16, but I understand why OP is asking. And I think at her age, at that time of the morning, that duration of walk is very probably OK. General safety considerations still apply.

I was away at Uni at 17 and a half. If I wanted to go anywhere, at any time, it was up to me.

Ds turned 18 last year, the week after starting at Uni (away from home). There have been times when he's had to get to his rugby club, 2 bus journeys away, for 6am or 7 am to get a coach to away trips. He has to do it for himself, in the depths of winter, in the dark (Aberdeen ), no matter the weather - there is nothing we can do from 200 miles away. All we've been able to do, at a distance, is to encourage him to ask for lifts for those occasions when it is too early for the bus service (and even that involves him having to walk a distance to get to a pick-up point.

You're not doing your 17 year old dd any favours in developing self-reliance in giving her lifts. Quite apart from not looking after yourself Don't feel guilty. Emjoy the lie-in

if the roads aren't stupidly busy I wonder why the roads are stupidly busy????? Full of dopey parents who won't let their 17 year olds walk anywhere in the rain or dark!!!!!!!!! Give me strength. No wonder the environment is in a terrible state. Hasn't anyone heard of the number of people killed in road traffic accidents it does happen , a bit of rain won't kill you , ever heard of umbrellas or macs and boots?

YABVU to even have to ask!

It will be good to walk to work, all the fresh air and exercise will be good for her. Give her an umbrella in case of rain.

Thanks all for the replies. We don't live in a particularly unsafe area, but we are close to town. At that time of the morning there are people walking back from a night out, so I do worry. There are shortcuts there that I would never take at that time ( wooded and poorly lit) so we've spoken about that. She isn't keen to walk, but appreciates that she will have to.
I'm not generally overprotective and certainly not dopey, but perhaps I have lost prospective!

I wonder why the roads are stupidly busy????? Full of dopey parents who won't let their 17 year olds walk anywhere in the rain or dark!!!!!!!!! Give me strength. No wonder the environment is in a terrible state

Yes, you’re right of course, THIS is the exact reason the environment is in a terrible state. It’s solely down to overprotective parents of teenagers. Give ME strength.

I misread that and thought you meant your dd has a two hour walk to school every day 😂. Was thinking, “wow, that’s tough parenting”

And uphill both ways!

How did she plan on getting there when she took the job?

Don’t feel bad. She will be ok.

Of course it's fine. I used to go jogging at that time at that age (and still do now), even in the dark

skittless She had a different job, but she was desperate to get out, so she took this one

FuckertyBoo, no one said 'solely'.

Absolutely fine walking. (Sorry if this has been said, not read whole thing but would just have the chat of being aware of her surroundings, not walking along plugged in in both ears).

I was doing my paper round at 14 starting 5.45am

She also needs to learn to judge danger, develop her perception of safety, for herself. You can encourage her, but it's something she needs to decide for herself what she is comfortable with and to build her confidence.

Ds could take a short cut to get a single bus to rugby training (when they moved locations for winter training) but after walking through the dark park just the once from his student accommodation, he now walks the long, lit way