To say that some people use their mental health for attention

[ODGU]

Firstly I'm not bashing people with mental health, I have struggles myself.

A member of my family lives with a long term mental health diagnosis, that much is undisputed and it must be incredibly difficult for them to endure. I get that.

However, they regularly make the decision to stop taking their medication which they know they need to stay functioning and well. Their choice to stop their medication always coincides with something important going on in somebody else's life, think weddings, babies or big life events.

I'm about to give birth and this person has decided to stop their medication once again, causing a big panic within the family and worrying my DM sick, taking her focus and excitement away from her impending granddaughter and making it all about them. The same thing happened when I announced my last pregnancy, when my son was born, when I announced DD's pregnancy and now she's almost about to arrive.. they're doing it again.

We don't live together so babies are not a stress trigger for them.

She also did the same when my DB got married and my DM almost missed his big day because this relative (her sister) was causing a big fuss, again stopped taking her tablets.

The tablets work well and when maintained the mental illness is unrecognizable.

Today I told my DM that she's an attention seeker who uses her MH to control people around her.

AIBU to say that this is the case in a (probably very small) number of people.

Personally, I think posters such as Nat6999 and LimeKiwi and malificent7 need to stop projecting and actually read the original OP for what it was. It is perfectly valid to start a discussion to talk about the effects on others, when mental ill-health is abused by "some".
Talking about mental ill-health should include every difficult and devastating outcome, even if it is uncomfortable for some to read.
And this should go both ways.

Yes OP, I absolutely recognise that behaviour in some people. Weddings are a peak time for it IME. I hope your mother sees it for what it is and continues to support you.

@GoGoGadgetGin
I didn’t mean not talking but probably talk less with this particular person about upcoming big events.
Also it looks like OP’s Mum is always rushing to help her sister at the moment herself, surely having some one who could replace her in case of emergency would help?

Ah right Lynx sorry!

I wish I had more tolerance sometimes but after years of the world revolving around her my patience has worn thin unfortunately

My DM can't switch off from it and is consumed by her sisters fluctuating moods and whether or not she's taking her medication. I reduce contact with my aunt for my own sake and that of my DC when she takes herself off her meds, but then I'm still engulfed in the drama of if because it's all my DM talks and worries about, as she needs somebody to be there for her whilst she's being there for my aunt.

I wish she'd just take her bloody medication as she's supposed to, stop being jealous and controlling about the fact DM has other family and grandchildren, and lean on her other support network for a change (group of friends, CPN, etc)