Would my baby be considered Mixed?

[CardboardAnnie]

I am mixed race, my husband is 100% white. Our baby would therefore be 75% white.

I think if I'm mixed, my child would obviously be mixed too. My husband disagrees. He thinks that our baby should just be classed as white (on forms etc).

Our baby most likely won't look particularly non white, some people don't always realise that I am mixed. But I am, and somehow it feels wrong to just write that part of me off?

It got a bit heated when we were discussing it again earlier, and I thought some outside opinions would help!

Your oh needs to know that your grandchild could be as dark or darker than your darkest relative, have hair or features inherited from way back. Same risk of sickle cell, or thallasemia if Mediterranean, etc.
Meghan markles dad gave good advice, make your own box, but your dc are mixed ethnicity/heritage. We are all human race.

Does mixed heritage specifically pertain to white British and black? What about white British and another white background? Say Canadian where’s most family hx are British or French heritage?

This is why 'mixed' isnt used anymore, "dual heritage" is preferred because it covers eg Ghana/Nigeria - the heritage that is mixed not the preception of ethnicity.

My SIL is a quarter Chinese and you would never guess since she’s a blonde. Her dad is half Swiss German and Chinese and looks rather Celtic like her sibling as opposed to mixed race.

Nowhere does it say that mixed race has to be 50 50!

I'd say a quarter is too big to ignore. It may affect health etc. When doctors ask for things like 'is there a family history of x' I think they're asking grandparents as well as parents. Maybe after that you can argue it wouldn't count but I would think a quarter does. Also your daughter will clearly know one of your parents isn't white - it's her living relative and she may be interested. For great grandparents it wouldn't be a relevant as wouldn't have a direct relationship with the child

Why is he so against it? It's to ensure discrimination doesn't happen and to collect stats around different health conditions for different races, not so they can put a label on someone or treat them differently.

I'm mixed.

I think your kids are mixed, but will look just white and prob identify as white.

Im 25% A, 25% B, 50% C.
I know my heritage proudly. I just consider my parent as white, even tho they're half. I'd not use 'A' as an identifier, even tho I'm as much 'A' as I am white, I just don't have that cultural link.
So hopefully you can share your chinese culture with your children.

Do you consider Mariah Carey as mixed or white? @OP
Barack Obamas kids, would you identify them as black or mixed? They're 25% white.
Tiger woods kids are 25% chinese, I'd consider them mixed because of their black heritage they look mixed. Rather than because of their chinese side.
Shirley Ballass, head judge on strictly, has black ancestors, I'd not consider her as mixed, at all.

At the end if the day, our similarities outweigh our differences. Xx

Well they are mixed. You can call it dual heritage if you want to. I mean technically, we are all mixed aren't we, when we drill down far enough, but in this instance is slightly more clear cut.
I'm mixed (50/50) and my 'white' ancestry is Scottish, although not since the late 1900s. My husband is white and his ancestry is also Scottish.

We are English. We were raised in England. Our kids are English. Our culture is English. But I'd still say they are 25% Thai. You can't tell by looking at them. We have no Thai identity (as I wasn't raised by my Thai parent) but its undeniably there. And if they want to claim it as theirs, they have every right to do so. Actually DS2 is best friends with a child who is also 1/4 Thai. You can't tell from looking at her either. But she is. Its a fact.

Tyson Beckford is 1/4 Chinese and he has clear Chinese features. Your DH needs to be open minded because he could end up with a Chinese looking child.

goo.gl/images/ydHY4h

My DC’s father is mixed white/black Caribbean. Both DC look white. I put them down as mixed like their father. I do feel a bit conflicted over it though. It almost feels like cheating because in this world, they genetically lucked out and don’t face the same sort of negative stereotyping and discrimination that their cousins do. Incidentally, their cousins have mixed-race mothers and white fathers and still very much look mixed-race.

It is funny, a family friend looks white, describes himself as white but is technically mixed race. His gran looks very white, but her brother looks more black.

I don’t know why it matters to your husband so much not to call your baby mixed race, it’ll be the same baby with the same parents won’t it? When the child is old enough to describe themself then they can decide whether they believe themself to be white or mixed race.

@ThomasRichard I know you don't truly mean that they "genetically lucked out", but it's worth thinking about your language and how it reflects your underlying feelings. I am proud of showing my heritage in my face, associated hardships or no - and if my husband said (or even thought quietly) that my less ethnic-looking children had 'lucked out' I'd be really upset on behalf of all my DCs.

@Stuckforthefourthtime apologies for any offence. Perhaps my wording wasn’t clear: they are ‘lucky’ insofar that a genetic fluke means that they don’t experience direct racism in the same way that their cousins do. The world they live in perceives them and their cousins differently because of their appearance and yes I do consider them lucky not to face that kind of discrimination. Not lucky to be white-looking per se.

I'm half South African (dark skinned), half mixed-Indian and I look "white" but class myself as mixed race.

I've got genetic traits of each (3b curly hair, olive skin, vaguely exotic looking) but if you didn't know my background or see anyone else in my family you'd assume I was Italian or Greek. I sometimes get Brazilian too.
My husband is Scottish and I describe our children as mixed heritage because they are.

I like my heritage, I love being the product of a number of different races (African, Indian, SE Asian) so I'll always put mixed.

Of course your baby is mixed heritage. Genetic fact, nothing to do with looks.

contrary13 I love what you’ve written there. I am white with almost black hair, all of my mixed (Turkish) children, even the dark skinned olive one, have much lighter hair and eyes than both me and DH. One is blonde, two have blue eyes.

Both mine and DH are brown eyed, DH’s are almost black they are so dark. Neither of his parents have blue eyes. Genes are so interesting!

Your DH sounds like a bit of a Dick tbh. I'd want to know why he doesn't see your Chinese heritage as important or as part of his DC.

I hate those forms. I'm of Middle Eastern heritage (both parents) and there were rarely any relevant boxes so I would just go for 'other'.

Now my son who is half white/English is going to be god knows what on the forms. He looks whiter than his white English dad does but I feel should put something to recognise his Middle Eastern heritage. Chances are he too will be an 'other'.

@eyesbiggerthanstomach my DS is one quarter () Iranian. I just put 'other' too.

I'm Chinese and DH is white, so our dc are half Chinese. But they don't look it - people are often surprised when I've collected them as they expect them to have white parents (I've been mistaken for the nanny more than once...). Personally I've tended to tick 'White British' in forms on their behalf. Obviously they can make their own choice when they're older. I grew up in the UK, and don't have any Chinese friends or speak the language, so I don't feel particularly connected to the culture, and I have quite a 'British' outlook on life. But I've experienced a lot of racism and discrimination (often subtle) and I am definitely relieved that the dc can avoid that to an extent. I've made a conscious decision not to give them my surname as a middle name, so from their name and appearance they can blend in with any group of ordinary white people, in a way that I've never been able to.

@ ThomasRichard
I knew what you meant.
I totally get it as I face same for 2 of my 3 DC, despite the fact they ARE mixed race and my most white looking DS only got racist abuse when a school child in his year saw him with his obviously black Dad. He doesn't usually get racism outwardly.

And it shocked him but he could be more confident than his more black sister, who gets more racism.

It's not about what you look like though. And I disagree with some of PPs. Since sickle cell is a real issue & other genetic issues are a very live real issue in our family.

I mean he is mixed but it doesn't really matter...at the end of the day all classifying him as white would do is stop him being able to apply for BAME only applications. If he looks white he'll be treated as such

I would say even your children's children are mixed and their children... past that of all others had been white I would say white.

My friend has a black grandparent and looks white unless you know she's not, then you notice the hair texture and facial features... she is mixed and proud of it.

We’re mixed. I’m white presenting in the sense I don’t look like mum’s ethnicity but most people think I’m med / Middle Eastern. Ds father Southern European.

Ds is med skin but is often mistaken as se Asian (he’s not).

When a baby the midwife saw my mum so offered us the TB vaccine which we obviously took up.

So I’d say regardless what your kids look like, put down their full ethnicities at least for medical purposes.

Ds now older self identifies as white - to him - he bases that on his skin colour and Southern Europeans are white. But he’s also very close culturally to all his backgrounds.

I'm %100 white, DP is half white British and half thai. We consider our DC to be mixed ethnicity and that's what we tick on forms.

I never filled in forms denoting what racial group my dc were because I don't think its up to me (or my dh) to decide that - its for them. But I don't think of them as anything but themselves - if that makes sense - but I do believe children should understand their background & have contact with their extended family & be proud to the child of both parents

ps I did get the tb shots for them - it was at school I drew the line