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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To make an official complaint about the NHS?

77 replies

Tuplo · 10/03/2019 01:45

Also, has anyone made one?

Last year I went several times to my GP and got told my symptoms were due to menopause. Then one day I was suddenly in agony - on the floor type agony. Phoned an ambulance, told it was non urgent, friend took me to a&e. Spent hours being examined and having x-rays, told needed further tests but could go home as was too late to do them. Came back, admitted, condition partially diagnosed but needed more investigation still, possible cancer, two weeks for tests then surgery.

At that point I was given a discharge sheet outlining everything including that I was given open access to the ward and told to return if intense pain came back as this would be an emergency and I would need surgery immediately.

Pain recurred, thankfully ambulance sent this time, blue lighted screaming and vomiting. Got to hospital, couldn't get into ward for an hour, no one answering.

Eventually got in, dr examined, showed him paper drawn up six hours previous, ignored this said he thought I had a kidney infection, banging on my back and asking if it hurt.

Left in ward waiting area where nurse gave me paracetamol and told me dr had said to take this and then I could go home. Screaming, crying, vomiting all the time.

This repeated several times over the next few hours. Healthcare assistants walking in and out as I lay across chairs vomiting. Asked me what I'd had to eat that night and when I said nothing opined that this was why I was vomiting and in so much pain and should look after myself.

Overhead a conversation between dr and a nurse with dr saying I couldn't possibly have the complication (which it turned out I had) and her saying she thought I did. Also overhead another nurse saying, repeatedly, as I vomited, that "it's noisy in here tonight".

Eventually nice nurse came and told me I was being admitted, four hours after getting in under supposedly open access.

Had emergency surgery the next day.

A couple of months later did put in informal complaint about dr, got a letter back saying my admission had been delayed because no dr was available. They're lying. I saw a Dr. He just failed to diagnose me, even when it was all there in my notes.

It's taken me a long time to recover from the surgery, which was major. It's going to take me even longer to get over this dr's attitude. At two separate points while I was vomming all over the waiting room he came in and said 'what do you want me to do?' I fucking hate him. I thought I was going to fucking die and he was refusing to help me. He's a cunt that should never be allowed near another patient.

But: is it worth making a complaint? They've already lied to me once. Should I just get over it? (Somehow. I don't know how.)

OP posts:
BlueSlipperSocks · 10/03/2019 02:08

You should have paid to see a private consultant, rather than be treated by the NHS. Next time you need immediate medical attention don't bother with the NHS. The medical staff at NHS hospitals are for the unworthy don't you know Biscuit

Tuplo · 10/03/2019 02:22

Ok thanks Confused

OP posts:
Tuplo · 10/03/2019 02:25

Why the biscuit? Do you think my discomfiture at a dr failing to diagnose what was wrong with me and wanting to send me home with paracetamol despite having my notes, is unwarranted? I think he is incompetent.

OP posts:
MarvinMarvinson · 10/03/2019 02:26

No idea what blue slipper is on about but you absolutely should complain. The informal complaint clearly hasn't been dealt with properly if their response is factually incorrect. I'm sorry you had to go through that Tuplo.

CordeliaEarhart · 10/03/2019 02:33

I'd make the complaint. He may be incompetent or it may be that no reasonable doctor would have seriously considered the actual complication you had. But, by complaining, it will be looked at properly by someone qualified to assess that.

Sounds like you had a horrific time of it tbh - I hope you recovery is going well.

Nowthenforever2019 · 10/03/2019 02:34

Ignore blue slipper, clearly didn't understand your post or did and just is am arse.

Yes, complain.

Tuplo · 10/03/2019 02:37

Thank you. I'm not sure how stressful it is though. I mean, I know that he got it badly wrong. I just don't know if I can do this. Putting in the informal complaint was bad enough. I mean it's difficult to talk about. I haven't told many people about it because the memory freaks me out. I'm only talking about it tonight because I can't sleep and I'm chewing over it (again). And then for them to lie about what happened.

OP posts:
HelenaDove · 10/03/2019 02:40

OP im so sorry to read this The way you were treated was inhumane Thanks

Tuplo · 10/03/2019 02:42

The complication was specified on my discharge notes from my day admission as being a possibility. It was what I was warned about would be indicated by severe pain and that I'd need emergency surgery. I gave this to the dr when I was taken there in severe pain. And he prescribed paracetamol and said to wait until I felt better and then go home. For four hours. The possible complication, which it turned out I had, which I repeatedly told him I had, was on my notes!

OP posts:
CheshireChat · 10/03/2019 02:51

That sounds terrible, if people don't complain (when warranted obviously) then services will never improve, budget cuts notwithstanding.

I think BlueSlipperSocks thought that you are complaining about the NHS as a whole rather than your treatment that specific time.

Also I'm getting ads about improved treatments for amputees... All well and good, but rather niche!

maras2 · 10/03/2019 02:59

Sorry that you had such a bad time,but can I be nosey and ask what was wrong with you and what surgery did it necessitate?
The fact that you're still so angry(rightfully so) makes me think that you may have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.Sad.
Please see a GP that you trust.
Best wishes. Flowers

Rottencooking · 10/03/2019 03:25

OP, YANBU. and @BlueSlipperSocks can shove their biscuit up their arse. Probably an incompetent doctor themselves.

Tuplo · 10/03/2019 03:46

Maras, I don't know if I've got PTSD. Most of the time I don't feel anything really. Then sometimes like tonight it all hits me and I feel angry and frustrated. But mostly I don't feel anything. It's very unusual for me to think about it properly at all. I just shake my head and think about something else.

What I really want is for none of this to have happened. I know that sounds childish. It's just so hard to think about. I don't think that taking the complaint further will help with that, necessarily. I really thought I was going to die. I nearly did die. I can remember lying in that room and puking and the pain was like another person there with me. That's all the world was, just me, and the room, and the pain, swooping over my head, taking over everything. Several times I got my phone out to dial 999, because that's what you do when you're dying, you dial 999 and someone helps you. Then I remembered that I'd already dialled 999, and here I was, and no one was helping me.

OP posts:
Doublevodka · 10/03/2019 04:10

Tuplo, that is horrendous. You should complain. It needs investigating properly and then that NHS Trust needs to apologise to you, particularly for the insensitivity of the staff and learn what it can from that incident. That's how things change and improve.

Stories like this make my blood boil. Just to add, I'm a nurse in the NHS.

Tuplo · 10/03/2019 04:30

Doublevodka, bless you. I should make it clear that I'm not anti NHS as a whole, and as a nurse I know you do an amazing job. The nurse who I heard arguing with the dr that night also did an amazing job. I don't know the ins and outs of it because I couldn't hear everything that went on but I know that she had my back. She was good to me on the ward as well once I'd had the surgery. I'm grateful to her, truly. But that dr was wrong. I dread to think what might have happened if she hadn't spoken up.

I just don't know if going down the formal route is worth it. They've already lied once. I don't know how involved the official complaints process all gets and what obstacles might be put in my way. But then I do know this wasn't right.

OP posts:
SleepWarrior · 10/03/2019 04:37

That sounds hideous, I'm so sorry. Is it this one particular doctor that you would be making the complaint about?

Can I ask what the complication was, just out of curiosity? Obviously fine if you are intentionally not wanting to share.

blackcat86 · 10/03/2019 04:42

You should absolutely make a formal complaint. We are currently going through one following the birth of my daughter last summer. What should have been a precautionary c section led to the near death of my baby as the midwife left her without a blanket and she got hypothermia. Google the hospital and find the email address for their PALS. They will talk you through the process. Be prepared that initially the hospital will be obsessed with covering their arse. This is their main priority. Write a letter clearly detailing what happened. Highlight where failings occurred, where you were poorly treated and how its impacted you now. Include copies of any evidence. Be prepared for a shitty response but dont let up. Counter any lies, be clear and factual. See what they will admit to and send copies to the GMC.

Have you considered finding a local clinical negligence lawyer? I didn't want some big firm where you couldn't ever get hold of anyone. I emailed 5 or 6 local firms that offered clinical negligence. They cant do anything until we've concluded our complaint but have offered to read our complaint letters for free. Also see if there are any complaint advocacy services near you.

See you GP as you do seem to be struggling a little. They may be able to refer you for counselling.

I hate the midwife who we saw to. I want her to suffer. I want her to loose her job and for everyone to know what she did. These feelings are normal. You want the hospital to truly admit to and understand what went wrong and make improvements . Just be prepared that this rarely happens and you will need to keep pushing.

Doublevodka · 10/03/2019 04:44

Tuplo, I work with some amazing doctors and nurses who really do care and go above and beyond. Sadly I also work with some terrible ones, who have zero empathy and are lazy and incompetent. I would urge you to complain if you feel you have the emotional energy. You have been through a terrible ordeal and things will never change if people keep quiet. By all means explain you had a positive experience with that nurse, it's always good for us to hear the nice stuff, but I cannot abide those shitty, lazy, uncaring attitudes that some display.

I would agree with the previous poster who mentioned PTSD. Sometimes an experience like that can have a serious impact. Some people do find it beneficial to talk to a counsellor. Just a thought. Whatever you decide I wish you the best.

Tuplo · 10/03/2019 04:44

Yeah, the one dr mostly but actually also the one hour delay getting into the ward also. They didn't answer the door to paramedics. Also the hcas telling me it was my fault because I hadn't eaten, the nurse making quips about the noise of me vomiting and actually also the same nurse telling me that obviously I was in pain because of the primary diagnosis (it wouldn't have caused that much pain and in fact it didn't until the complication hit - I honestly can't describe that pain properly, it was like I was in another dimension, another reality with it) and that I should be home in bed.

OP posts:
Tuplo · 10/03/2019 05:06

Blackcat, I'm so sorry to hear what happened to your daughter. The intense worry and fear you felt must have been awful. And thank you for understanding how I feel about that dr. I don't want him to be around patients any more. What kind of a dr says 'what do you want me to do' to a patient? He didn't know wtf he was doing.

As it happened I did actually answer him the second time he said that, saying that I hadn't spent five years at medical school but actually what I wanted to happen was to get intravenous morphine and then emergency surgery.

This did eventually occur. Guess I should be a dr. Confused

Thank you for the very useful pointers from your position further down this journey. I wish you well with your endeavours.

Doublevodka thank you. The lack of care and competence was just staggering compared to when I'd been in getting the primary diagnosis. Everyone was so efficient and also aware of the fact that I'd had some pretty huge news to deal with, we'd set up a plan, I thought I knew how it would go, but it just wasn't that way at all, in the end.

OP posts:
CanuckBC · 10/03/2019 05:27

I would complain. I would want everyone to know how horrible the care was so that no one else would have to go through the hell I did. It may not help me but hopefully it would help the next person.

The so call care you received sounds atrocious. I am sorry you went through that. I hope you heal fully💐

slipperywhensparticus · 10/03/2019 05:35

We don't get quick access to private healthcare in this country blue slipper we have and pay for the NHS

Mummyoflittledragon · 10/03/2019 06:03

@BlueSlipperSocks
I was recently referred to a private surgeon due to complications from recent surgery. I knew I needed an operation and one pretty quickly but didn’t realise how fast. He found a bed for me and transferred me immediately to the NHS hospital. The private system isn’t set up for emergency admissions or emergency surgery. I would have needed to wait 6 weeks for a private op. That wasn’t an option.

I’d been to a&e about 2 weeks prior and told by the triage nurse I definitely didn’t have the complication. How wrong! And potentially dangerous to my health.

I understand op. You feel like a pawn in the nhs. Gagged and ignored.

ColeHawlins · 10/03/2019 06:08

I suspect you've upset blueslipper by not mindlessly worshipping every inch of the NHS and all its doings. Ignore her.

I think you're quite right to complain. It sounds horrendous Thanks

Purplecatshopaholic · 10/03/2019 06:42

You poor thing. I think you probably should complain if you can bear to as it will mean re-living the experience again. I think you should consider counselling maybe?