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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel rage at husband saying ‘that’s a lot of calories’

101 replies

ShardsOfIce · 08/03/2019 12:18

Husband asked if I wanted lunch picking up. Yes thanks, I’ll have a sandwich and some crisps and a drink!

He replies with - that’s a lot of calories, sure you just don’t want the sandwich and drink?

Even if I wasn’t 37 weeks pregnant, this would irritate me! As it stands, I am incandescent with fiery pregnancy rage!!! Especially as I have been worried that my weight gain hasn’t been so great (had scans for small bump, 9kg so far), even if I was a huge pregnant whale, I don’t think this would even be appropriate. He’s all sorry now of course.

Grrrrrr so ragey! So ragey I joined mumsnet to post this. This rant helps. Can you help too? Rage! Rage! Angry

OP posts:
PiebaldHamster · 08/03/2019 13:53

Why do you put up with it, Starlight? Fuck that!

Paperdoll1 · 08/03/2019 13:57

Dang! I would have lost my bits over that!! :) Funny that you joined to post a rant - I like it!

Singlenotsingle · 08/03/2019 13:57

I've just had a fish finger sandwich in M&S cafe with coleslaw, leaves and a cappuccino. Whoa! The calories! And I'm not even pregnant!Grin

SoyDora · 08/03/2019 13:57

He has a point. A sandwich loaded with cheese, meat, mayo etc plus a bag of crisps plus a large full-sugar drink can be pushing 1000 calories, which is a lot of calories for lunch

And equally a non laden sandwich and a low/no sugar drink wouldn’t be too many calories. What’s your point? You also have no idea what else the OP has eaten/will eat over the course of today, and without that information the number of calories in her lunch is completely irrelevant.

gamerchick · 08/03/2019 13:58

He has a point. A sandwich loaded with cheese, meat, mayo etc plus a bag of crisps plus a large full-sugar drink can be pushing 1000 calories, which is a lot of calories for lunch

Is that what you have and are just assuming l, because I don't see anywhere the OP elaborated?

GreigLaidlawsbarofsoap · 08/03/2019 13:59

@Jsmith99 did you miss the part where the OP is heavily pregnant AND measuring small??!! Hmm

Iamdanish · 08/03/2019 13:59

See the bright side. You can use this against him for years to come 😁.

katmarie · 08/03/2019 14:00

Sandwich crisps and a drink is a perfectly reasonable lunch! I think my dh would be thrilled if I ate that at the moment, I'm 8 weeks and all i want to eat is sushi and chocolate. Which my dh is doing his best to supply me, but I know he'd be relieved if I'd eat something a bit more balanced!

GreigLaidlawsbarofsoap · 08/03/2019 14:03

starlight why do you put up with that crap? He has NO right to comment on your food choices.

OP I've just got a pack of Thai sweet chilli crisps out the cupboard to eat them in solidarity with you! I haven't been pregnant in many a year but I do remember the Rage!!

PiebaldHamster · 08/03/2019 14:04

In honour of this thread I had a couple of Morrison's multi-grain flatbreads with hummus and lots of veg and a bag of crisps.

feelingverylazytoday · 08/03/2019 14:04

Hold on, hold on a minute. I've just spotted Singlenotsingle's post.
M&S cafes do fish finger sandwiches? Why was I not told this very important piece of information?

CharlyAngelic · 08/03/2019 14:06

@PiebaldHamster ; the use of the word 'poisonous' in your post could cover an allergy scenario.

MerryBerryCheesecake · 08/03/2019 14:19

Mine would sometimes comment on what I was eating. That stopped when I had something wrong with me (never did find out for sure what but definitely something physical, not anorexia or similar) a few years back and I was gradually eating less and less until I could barely swallow food at all. In the end I was surviving on two cups of tea, 2-3 belvita breakfast biscuits that took me over an hour to get through, a two finger KitKat, half a normal size packet of chicken crisps and one cup of sugared coffee with coffeemate per day and I had to force those down. All food repulsed me. I struggled in the extreme to get it down and became dangerously unwell as my fat body began to fall to pieces. He would go out to try and find something tempting, come back and cook it then place it in front of me only to watch me heave when I tried to eat it.

Witnessing this struggle made him cry, several times.

He's never commented since I regained the ability to eat again and is now worried it will happen again.

I tell you this in hope that you point out to your DH that he should be damn grateful that you can eat in order to nourish yourself and the child you are growing.

I'd also offer to "cook" his dinner tonight and serve ,him one plain rice cake with some grated carrot and a small glass of tap water if he's so keen on watching calories

winsinbin · 08/03/2019 14:19

I made my own sandwich with ham and lettuce and tomato in granary bread Halo. However it had butter too, lots of butter. Therefore I challenge any shop bought ham salad sandwich to match it for calories or deliciousness.

Sadly I didn’t have any crisps to make it a homemade meal deal but I did have half a bag of chocolate brownie popcorn afterwards. I feel a bit full now and am going to stay very still and quiet for a little while.

dreichuplands · 08/03/2019 14:34

It is entirely up to you what you eat and none of his business.
It is my understanding that you really need hardly any extra calories when pregnant so the eating for two thing isn't really true.
That said I would eat that lunch and I'm not pregnant, (when pregnant I couldn't eat as much as I can now)

howabout · 08/03/2019 14:35

Crisp sandwich surely?

Your DH needs sorting out before he starts with the food police act on your DC. It gives me the absolute rage when other family members and friends do this around my DC. Thankfully my DH is far more interested in maximising his junk food intake than he is in minimising mine (we are both the same slim size as 30 years ago)

Singlenotsingle · 08/03/2019 14:45

feelingverylazy sorry I didn't know you were interested. They're thick and juicy and VERY yummy. Grin

Mother87 · 08/03/2019 15:53

Burritofan - random fishGrinGrin

Princessmushroom · 08/03/2019 17:37

It’s Friday, isn’t everyone adding a chocolate bar to their lunches too?

Ginnymweasley · 08/03/2019 17:58

Why do some people think they have the right to comment on what anyone eats. I had a sandwich and crisps for lunch and I'm not pregnant I then had some chocolate. It was nice. And you know what? Friday is our pig out tea so tonight's meal of choice is a fry up. Some people would be having palpitations at my food intake today.

AppleKatie · 08/03/2019 18:14

When I dated my DH we had eaten brunch one day then gone to the cinema, later in the day we were shopping and passed a restaurant, he asked me if I was hungry. I said no because I didn’t want to be ‘that’ woman who eats all the time. He gave me a really hard stare and said ‘you don’t have to that with me’.

And he was right I was hungry... we went in. And I was another step closer to knowing he was the one for me!

I couldn’t live with the food police.

CharlyAngelic · 08/03/2019 18:35

That’s lovely @AppleKatie

Rach000 · 08/03/2019 18:54

That's a normal easy lunch. Yes pre made sandwiches might not be best but don't always have a choice maybe he should have made one!!
Can't believe he asked that when you are pregnant. Not even bad without a bar of chocolate as well. Hope he won't be questioning all the chocolate you might eat when baby arrives. I needed chocolate to get me through the sleep deprivation. And I didn't pile weight on, with my first I lost a lot due to been so tired and on my feet with her so much.

Bookworm4 · 08/03/2019 18:59

I'd have said mind my 4 donuts as well, cheeky cunt 🙄

rioroller · 08/03/2019 19:16

I was just coming N to say what book Except I’d have asked for 7 doughnuts.

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