It’s hard to get through life without a sense of humour...

[Sophisticatedsarcasm]

DS 11 who has autism has a really good sense of humour and is very sarcastic, he often has his school friends in hysterics. The other day he came home to tell me one of his classmates always tells him his jokes are not funny despite most of the class laughing.
I told him not to worry and keep being himself, that the boy won’t get very in far in life if he doesn’t have a sense of humour. I know both parents and they both have a laugh so he obviously didn’t get the genes. I personally think life is hard enough so joking is a way to lighten the load. As a family we literally joke about everything and that’s how we deal with things. Who else agrees?

Whilstbthe child is rather rude to yours, he’s entitled to not find your kid funny. Not everyone likes the class clown.

I told him not to worry and keep being himself, that the boy won’t get very in far in life if he doesn’t have a sense of humour.

What an incredibly twatty thing to say.

Just to clarify my son isn’t the class clown the others boys best friend actually is.
I feel like it’s only twatty to those who don’t have a sense of humour 😊

I agree that life is far easier if you have a sense of humour - more specifically, I think it’s important to be able to laugh at yourself as much as anything. That doesn’t mean that anyone who doesn’t share your DS’s sense of humour - or even the humour of the majority - doesn’t have a sense of humour. They can find him unfunny or irritating. That’s perfectly normal. There are plenty of very popular, successful comedians who leave me cold. It isn’t obligatory to find something or somebody funny just because most other people do. Your attitude on that isn’t going to do your DS any favours.

Well I don’t find Will Ferrell or Ricky Gervais funny but I have a sense of humour

Whilst it’s great to big your son up, don’t do it by tearing others down.

I feel like it’s only twatty to those who don’t have a sense of humour

Who are you exactly to decide who has the appropriate sense of humour?

Perhaps your son's sarcasm is rubbing people up the wrong way.

I think a sense of humour is a very subjective thing. Ive got a dark sense of humour but I don’t like ‘I’m mad me’ zany characters and I would imagine they find me po faced.

There are plenty of very popular, successful comedians who leave me cold.

Precisely. Just because the majority find someone or something funny, doesn’t mean those who don’t are completely lacking in humour. My partner finds The Big Bang Theory hilarious, I don’t think I’ve laughed once when watching it. On the other hand, I love(d) the British version of The Office, and partner would rather have his teeth pulled than watch it. Doesn’t mean either of us are lacking in any sense of humour, just find different things funny. Imagine telling each other that we wouldn’t get far in life because we didn’t find one particular person or thing funny .

Humour is completely subjective and you’d be serving your son much better by telling him everyone is different and finds different things amusing than by denigrating another child and giving your son a sense of unearned superiority. You and your son aren’t the arbiters of “official funny” and it’s perfrctly possible other children are laughing to be polite rather than tickled pink by the class joker.

As a family we literally joke about everything and that’s how we deal with things.

Well good for you, so do I, but some people don't and that's also fine! Humour is subjective and maybe the kid didn't particularly find it funny. Also, 11 year olds are generally annoying and think they are hilarious when they are in fact, not

The agree op. I laugh constantly but often not at the same things as everyone else. I don’t find stand up comedy funny or old fashioned stuff like monty python but I find humour in every day stuff. My sense of humour is often inappropriate and apparently, in appropriate.

I love Ricky gervais because his way of thinking reflects mine.

I’m also on the spectrum btw and probably find your son funny.

Offensive I meant to say! Inappropriate and offensive! 😁

I agree Op. As a family, we are always finding humour in everyday situations and we laugh together at least once a day.
I also think it's important that you can laugh at yourself and not take things too seriously.

I feel like the kind of people who judge other people’s senses of humour are usually the ones who are chronically unfunny and have a very un-pc sense of humour themselves

All very Jim Davidson circa 1986

I feel like it’s only twatty to those who don’t have a sense of humour

Who the fuck are you to judge and define what a sense of humour is?!

What Shirley said.

Not everyone has the same sense of humour. I don't like sarcasm or toilet humour. Some people fall over themselves laughing at those types.

I don't like Ricky Gervais but a lot of people think he is a comic genius.

I think a sense of humour is a very subjective thing. Ive got a dark sense of humour but I don’t like ‘I’m mad me’ zany characters and I would imagine they find me po faced.

^This.

You and your son aren't the arbitrators of what is and isn't funny. Humour is subjective.

The problem with sarcasm is that it's often mean. Have you checked with your son that this boy isn't regularly a victim of his jokes?

Sarcasm is often not funny especially if it is at someone’s expense.

Most of my sons jokes are about himself anyway. I know the boy, apparently he doesn’t laugh at anything. Even my sons best friend said he’s just serious all the time. He doesnt even laugh at his best friends jokes. Obviously I know everyone likes different kinds of humour, my original question is does anyone agree that you won’t get far in life without a sense of humour. Maybe I should have phrased it differently but I still stand by it.

No actually there was a time he was being mean to my son, the boy and a group of his friends were always annoying my son and his friends, they’ve since moved on and just usually stay away from each other.

Humour is very subjective. I have a FB friend who clearly thinks he's some kind of comedian and frequently posts huge 'humerous' monologues full of shit metaphors that are supposed to be hilarious and clever and that his hangers on lap up. I however think they are about as funny as a piles...

He's the son of close family friends though, and I'd never be so rude as to point out that he's just not very funny, so I unfollowed him. I can remember that feeling when one of the monologues popped up though and thinking to myself 'you are just not funny. Do not give up the day job'.

You say your DS is "very sarcastic", most of his friends are "in hysterics" but one boy says the jokes aren't funny. My first thought was that your DS was making fun of someone who didn't like it

I think it's important to be good humoured, but I'm not sure you have to have a sense of humour to get on in life. My friend is very quiet, calm and peaceful. I've never heard her tell a joke, or laugh at a joke, but she's content and happy

my original question is does anyone agree that you won’t get far in life without a sense of humour.

In what aspects will they ‘not get far’? Career? Love life? Friendship group? I know plenty of people who I’d consider ‘dry’ personalities who have managed all of the above. You don’t need humour for a good job, as for interpersonal relationships, adults just tend to find people of their own ‘type’.

I’m not sure at all what you’re getting at by those lacking your perception of humour not getting along in life - do you think these people get to a certain age, become self aware of their own humourless personalities and just completely stop functioning as humans?