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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Boys left behind at school while girls get trip

514 replies

Quickchat1 · 05/03/2019 23:42

Recently my sons class went on an educational trip to a local university. But only the girls. The boys were left behind with a cover teacher listening to music and generally doing very little. My son is GCSE year and would have benefited from a computing and science event. No it was only for the girls with no mention of anything for the boys. I understand this was a STEM event for girls only but if there was a STEM event for boys only there would be uproar! AIBU?

OP posts:
Ribbonsonabox · 06/03/2019 08:59

YABVU it's to get more girls into STEM! Would you have been cross if it was a drive to get ethnic minorities into uni.. or for people from lower income backgrounds??? Unis need to reach out to certain groups who are undrrepresented in order to bridge the gap... sometimes in certain areas that includes just girls.
YANBU to expect that the boys let back at the school would have had something a bit better to do than just listen to music though.

thankssomuchforthat · 06/03/2019 09:02

University gender gap at record high as 30,000 more women accepted.
www.theguardian.com/education/2017/aug/28/university-gender-gap-at-record-high-as-30000-more-women-accepted?CMP=Share_AndroidApp_Messages

MyOtherProfile · 06/03/2019 09:02

YABU to want boys to go on a STEM day to encourage girls.

YA also BU to believe your son that they just had a cover teacher all day and faddled around listening to music. Presumably not all the teachers for all subjects went on the trip and were baxk at school available to teach? I bet if you asked the school what the boys who remained did you would get a different answer.

Only I suspect the OP won't come back at all.

blackteasplease · 06/03/2019 09:04

YABU

Attitudes like this are exactly what is causing a problem in our society.

No, boys don't have to have everything girls have if the aim is to encourage girls into fields where they are underrepresented. They don't always have to have an equivalent.

IM0GEN · 06/03/2019 09:06

Recently my sons class went on a rugby trip to a local tournament. But only the pupils who pay rugby . The other were left behind with a cover teacher listening to music and generally doing very little.

My son is GCSE year and would have benefited from a day off school playing sports. No, it was only for the team, with no mention of anything for the others.

I understand this was a Rugby event for rugby players but if there was a Netball event for netball players only there would be an uproar.

Or maybe there wouldn’t . Because groups of children go to specific events all the time.

The kids studying biology or geography go on field trips. The orchestra play at festival or competitions.

The kids with dyslexia miss some French to do extra English.

It’s how most schools in the Uk work. I’m surprised you have not spotted this in the last 11 years your child has attended.

bookmum08 · 06/03/2019 09:07

PanGalatic but what do you actually 'do' in your job. Saying you are 'an engineer' is vague and I don't actually know how I could describe it to either a boy or a girl. This is a genuine question. What do you actually 'do' in your work?

Ribbonsonabox · 06/03/2019 09:08

@thankssmouchforthat on what courses though? And doesn't that statistic fall away when you look at masters and doctorates? Where men still dominate? I'm sure I read that recently.
There is still a lack of women in stem and this affects the pay gap...
Less boys may be going to do uni courses at 18... but they are still statistically likely to earn more money in their lives, statistically likely to hold positions of power etc.... so I do think that disparity does need to be addressed..

I'd like to see a drive recruiting boys into social care and arts subjects tbh!! I have a son and his education matters to me a lot. But I dont begrudge their being a specific recruitment drive for women in any field because I know the playing field is far from level for them however you look at it... and I think it benefits boys too...
The final frontier is getting careers thought of as traditionally feminine, given more respect and paid better so that boys are encouraged to consider them as options.

ErickBroch · 06/03/2019 09:08

YABVU. It is incredibly important to get more women and girls into STEM areas and events are targeting this, it's a great thing.

Nanny0gg · 06/03/2019 09:09

Ignoring general ridiculousness of the thread, Hair and beauty is a GCSE?

Whilst that is beyond ludicrous, it's hardly an analogy for engineering or science is it?

missmarplesapprentice · 06/03/2019 09:09

I work in a STEM industry (the only female in my deparment) and of all the girls in my school year to go onto university I was the only one to go and do Engineering. Of the 130 people on the course

Danubia · 06/03/2019 09:10

@thankssomuchforthat

Not in STEM though. Most of these girls are doing History/English degrees - subjects that rarely have the same earning potential as STEM subjects.

Sexnotgender · 06/03/2019 09:10

YABVU.

I have a STEM degree and interestingly there were a decent number of women on my course.

However in the workplace it’s a total sausage fest, 90%+ of my coworkers are male, granted I work in a traditionally male dominated field but it’s actually ridiculous. Teams of 20/30+ and one or two women maximum.

thankssomuchforthat · 06/03/2019 09:11

Genuine question, is it not the case that it is just as important to encourage working class boys into university by going on this type of trip? They are apparently the most "‘most under-represented group in higher education’.

"White working-class boys in England 'need more help' to go to university"

www.theguardian.com/education/2018/may/10/white-working-class-boys-in-england-need-more-help-to-go-to-university?CMP=Share_AndroidApp_Messages

Sexnotgender · 06/03/2019 09:13

Genuine question, is it not the case that it is just as important to encourage working class boys into university by going on this type of trip? They are apparently the most "‘most under-represented group in higher education’

Perhaps, but then they need their own initiative. Taking over the initiative to encourage girls into STEM isn’t the solution.

CuriousaboutSamphire · 06/03/2019 09:18

"White working-class boys in England 'need more help' to go to university" And there is an initiative (probably more) to address that, SUN Outreach has been working on it for a while

www.sunoutreach.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/ReportWhiteBritishWorkingClassmaleresearch5March-2.pdf

Thre is no need to stop one in order to do the other!

ThunderStorms · 06/03/2019 09:19

No, boys don't have to have everything girls have if the aim is to encourage girls into fields where they are underrepresented

But then girls don’t have to have everything boys have and we’re back to square one Confused

Springisallaround · 06/03/2019 09:21

More working class boys (and girls) should be going to university.

More girls should take up STEM subjects and/or work in STEM careers.

These things aren't mutually exclusive!

Perhaps if some of the people on this thread had studied STEM subjects like statistics, they would know this.

Pinkblanket · 06/03/2019 09:21

You are being totally ridiculous. Can you not think why it might be a girls only event?

CuriousaboutSamphire · 06/03/2019 09:21

But then girls don’t have to have everything boys have and we’re back to square one Erm... no, never mind!

CostanzaG · 06/03/2019 09:22

Genuine question, is it not the case that it is just as important to encourage working class boys into university by going on this type of trip? They are apparently the most "‘most under-represented group in higher education’.

There are already lots of well established initiatives which are working to address this particular inequality.....as well as other initiatives working with a wide range of underrepresented groups.
You might not be aware of them because targeting is often very specific and tight due to funding.

Girls and underrepresented in STEM subjects at university...that's a fact which needs addressing.It's about the bigger picture here not individual students.

Schools have a statutory duty under the New Gatsby Benchmarks to address stereotypes in careers and education. This event will have been one way the school is addressing this. They should also be addressing other stereotypes and under representation.

echt · 06/03/2019 09:23

Springisallaround

The OP made no issue about class.

bookmum08 · 06/03/2019 09:25

Could someone please list actual jobs that come under this vague 'stem' umbrella. Teens (boys and girls) need proper careers advice not a vague 'stem degree'.

IM0GEN · 06/03/2019 09:28

Could someone please list actual jobs that come under this vague 'stem' umbrella. Teens (boys and girls) need proper careers advice not a vague 'stem degree'

Google is your friend.

CostanzaG · 06/03/2019 09:29

bookmum young people should be seeking out careers advice from appropriately trained careers advisers....they can help with that question.

Frecklesonmyarm · 06/03/2019 09:29

Whilst women in STEM events are a great idea, I do think we run a risk of alienating the upcoming generation of boys

Eh boys wont want to do it because more girls do it?

This is ridiculous. If a profession wanted to recruit more ethnic minorities and ran events aimed towards that, like the police have, you think that's putting white people off applying?