Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

3 months pregnant and just been made redundant - no clue what to do!

152 replies

TwittleBee · 04/03/2019 15:14

I was greeted by my Director and HR manager this morning with the news that I am being made redundant. Brexit was their reason behind this along with I'm the last in so first out.

Anyway, I'm 3 months pregnant (They didn't know this btw) and so have no bloomin clue what to do next...

Our finances are so tight, we have a stupidly high mortgage and I'm the bread winner! I've done the maths and with everything striped back we will be £350 short a month. We won't be entitled to any support too (Halifax suggest we looked on entitledto website already) as DH earns £24k.

I've already asked Halifax if we could have a temporary break or just pay interest only but we don't qualify.

If I do apply for another job surely the new employer will be seriously annoyed that I am going to be leaving start of September? (Possibly sooner as DS was born early). Also how does mat leave and pay even work out?

I know £24k seems like a lot and I know many people manage to survive on that but we stupidly crippled ourselves with a mortgage of £1300 a month and have no savings. Again, I feel stupid now for us having another baby but there was no sign of job insecurity.

Just posting on here for advice, help or any sort of way out of this. Feel like I'm in a very dark hole right now and can't stop being physically sick with fear.

OP posts:
Rafflesway · 06/03/2019 11:02

It's years since I was pregnant but know in a few cases the women weren't aware until they were 4 or 5 months along.

If you found another position quickly could you not pretend your pregnancy is a total surprise once you have started?

I know it's a bit sneaky but needs must.

I too think everything happens for a reason although certainly doesn't feel like it at the time. I would put all my energies into finding another position and look forward rather than back. Flowers

Original poster
TwittleBee · 06/03/2019 15:48

Tbf I also know a couple people who didn't know they were pregnant until a few months in. One was still BF and another bled throughout. I actually am still bleeding during this pregnancy (scans confirm baby is fine).

OP posts:
ShatnersWig · 06/03/2019 15:55

@TwittleBee I don't mean this to sound facetious and some on the thread won't know what this is about but could you sell your woodland?

PumpedUpTermite · 06/03/2019 16:05

Could you get JSA or universal credit based on your NI contributions? I don’t believe it’s income based but would give you a bit extra each month.
Get in touch with agencies and try temping too, if you can. Even minimum wage work (hopefully on your dh’s days off so no childcare needed) would make a dent in the shortfall. I’m sorry this has happened to you

Original poster
TwittleBee · 06/03/2019 19:55

It's really not worth that much and it would be my sister's decision not just mine ShatnersWig but it is a reasonable consideration!

OP posts:
lms2017 · 06/03/2019 20:15

Hiya , I got made redundant while 38 weeks pregnant and completed on our longggggg process of a mortgage about 4 hours after I was officially redundant !

My partner stepped up and found better work he is a plumber so has a trade so earns well .

What does your partner do ? Can he not find more work / overtime or a better paid position.

You also need to think of the possibility of you not being able to return to work as quick as you want , any complications etc .

I am still off 2 years later though choice and that we save more than me working and paying nursery fees!

Congrats and good luck xx

Waterbottle1999 · 06/03/2019 20:32

Could you do Family Daycare for work?

Not sure what the licensing laws are where you are, my MIL made a killing doing that. Plus then you won't have to worry about childcare

Original poster
TwittleBee · 07/03/2019 05:06

Ah jeez that really is a late redundancy lms2017 ! My DH has no qualifications apart from 3 GCSEs at C grade (doesn't include English) but he has just been promoted at work but still not enough. His shift pattern does make it impossible really for him to get another job but he will be trying to get extra shifts. They're just not guanteed.

Waterbottle1999 sorry I'm not sure what family daycare is!

OP posts:
AgentJohnson · 07/03/2019 06:43

You said that you thought you had job security but you’re still on probation and in the circumstances by getting two months pay your employer is being generous.

Original poster
TwittleBee · 07/03/2019 07:59

Yeah as in I thought I would soon be finished with probation period, i was just given a massive long lasting project to oversee AgentJohnson . And yes I know 2 months pay is generous, they didn't need to give me anything.

OP posts:
Zigzagpolar · 07/03/2019 08:12

I don’t know if this would be helpful in your situation- but when I was in the process of having to leave my company due to thier discriminatory behaviour following my maternity leave I followed up all conversations with emails- so I had something in writing. I would outline the points they had made and the reasons they’d given. They gerbeall responded to them confirming my statements. They were used in the tribunal case. When my line manager said “well, no, actually I didn’t mean that” she was asked “so why did you not dispute it in the email you sent in response.” Why not email them and try to get them to confirm they extended your probationary period because of your miscarriage?

ForTheLoveOfDoughnuts · 07/03/2019 08:35

@TwittleBee I think I remember you from the ttc thread. Congratulations!

I found out I was pregnant end of Oct. first week of November I found out I was being made redundant. Was very early days so my work didn't know. My last day at my old job was 31st dec.. I got some legal advice and was told to not tell any prospective new employer that I was pregnant until I started. I started a new job end of January and told new boss the next week.
Not ideal but it is what it is. Planning to work till end of June/beginning July. My new company have been brilliant. Thankfully

ForTheLoveOfDoughnuts · 07/03/2019 08:39

@TwittleBee I think MAT allowance is £500-600 a month. You have to claim it through the job centre. That's all I'll be entitled to.

ThePants999 · 07/03/2019 08:42

Maybe you can kill two birds with one stone by offering to sell TwittleBee Woods to the CF neighbours!

Bluntness100 · 07/03/2019 08:54

I'm not sure these posts encouraging the op to go after them for discrimination are very helpful, discrimination is notoriously hard to prove in these circumstances and she's been there only nine months.

In addition I doubt they extended probation because she had a mis carriage, and more likely due to time off following rhe miscarriage impacting the period of probation and their ability to make a decision.

I'm surprised they went for redundancy though, they could simply have said it's not working out and terminated employment.

Op, signing up with temping agencies I think is the best bet here, you will surely be able to work through if you are willing, and once thr baby is here, look to go back into fill time employment.

Moreisnnogedag · 07/03/2019 09:16

What type of work are you in? Secretarial temping/ transcription suites can be reasonably well paid. How old is your dc?

Oh and I’m sorry to hear of you MC. That’s truly awful.

Findingthingstough18 · 07/03/2019 18:43

In addition I doubt they extended probation because she had a mis carriage, and more likely due to time off following rhe miscarriage impacting the period of probation and their ability to make a decision.

I agree with you that I don't think it's in OP's best interests to pursue a long discrimination case with an uncertain outcome/benefit - but just to say that this isn't ok either, pregnancy-related absence (which includes miscarriage) has to be recorded separately from other absence explicitly so that it can't treated as absence in disciplinary matters. There is actually an explicit answer on this from the Equality and Human Rights Commission:

An employee, who is in her probation period, has told me she is pregnant. Can I extend her probation if her performance has been affected by her pregnancy?
You should not extend the probation period if the reason for your employee’s poor performance is because of her pregnancy or pregnancy related illness. But, if extending her probation period is justified by the extent of poor performance before she became pregnant, you can do so because the reason for the extension is not related to her pregnancy.

www.equalityhumanrights.com/en/managing-pregnancy-and-maternity-workplace/help-and-support-employers/faqs-employers/employers

Original poster
TwittleBee · 11/03/2019 15:20

So update:

Applied for various jobs now, not much out there in my industry atm it seems so I've been applying to anything and everything. Not heard back yet but guess it's early days still.

(Oh FYI, I only had 2 days off for the MC and that was for the actual ERPC procedure)

OP posts:
thedisorganisedmum · 11/03/2019 15:48

good luck OP, I do hope you find something very quickly.

Original poster
TwittleBee · 11/03/2019 17:28

Do you all think I should th and stay in my industry or take a career break? It's just my mum's phoned me to say I should cancel the interviews I've lined up in my industry as I shouldn't mess them about with being pregnant etc. She advised switching careers for now to an easily replaceable job and then go back to my industry once I've finished having children?

OP posts:
Karigan195 · 11/03/2019 17:41

Very old school thinking. Stay on your industry of you can and want to. Good luck!

jennymalone · 13/03/2019 14:53

Would your mum give the same advice to a man who was starting a family with his wife?

No?

Then tell your mum to jog on with her sexist, outdated, impractical advice - it's terrible advice to give and you'd end up having to explain why you took a random veer off into another industry for a few months for the next few years of your career. Why on earth would you do that?

It sounds like advice given out to someone ("girls") in the 60s or 70s.

Dungeondragon15 · 13/03/2019 15:02

No way should you change career!

As for your redundancy I think it's very probable that you were discriminated against. They would have known you were trying to get pregnant if you have previously told them about a miscarriage and I bet they decided to get in there first and make you redundant before having to give you maternity leave. It will be hard to prove and I can understand why you wouldn't want to go down that route but I would think twice before being honest with employers in the future. People think the law protects them but as it's always hard to prove discrimination it's fairly useless.

Original poster
TwittleBee · 13/03/2019 19:20

Should I be open with employers about being pregnant? I was today in an interview and tbh it felt like a waste of time after I mentioned it. Mum just said least I can do is be honest.

Yup the law does nothing really in protecting Dungeondragon15 as there's no way to prove it usually, had this issue with DH when he was denied paternity leave.

OP posts:
ivykaty44 · 13/03/2019 19:53

a Box room that has a door, wooden flooring or off cut of nice carpet would easily rent for £350 per month. Try sparerooms.com and see what the rooms in your area are going for. Most house shares won’t include bills and so work out more expensive- especially when council tax is added, but live in lodgings are a true all in price and always much cleaner and nicer to live in.

Plenty of home work stuff around to make a bit of money, or get a part time supermarket job. A 16 hour a week job at £8 per hour is going to earn you £554 and you won’t pay tax and probably no NI either