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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

If you could go back in time and do one thing differently ...

186 replies

annie987 · 03/03/2019 23:53

... what would it be?

OP posts:
Jsmith99 · 04/03/2019 23:49

I would have invested in properties instead of squirrelling it away in savings accounts/ ISAs. Had I done so, I would now be independently wealthy and retired.

Meandwinealone · 04/03/2019 23:55

@Jsmith99
And if it had all collapsed
Then you’d say the opposite

It’s jusr life. And hindsight.

RomanticFatigue · 04/03/2019 23:56

Not gone out with my first boyfriend. He set the bar low and wrecked what little self-confidence I had. I didn't even fancy him when I met him Sad

Meandwinealone · 04/03/2019 23:56

@Pinkprincess1978
But you have your own home. Isn’t that fantastic

Meandwinealone · 04/03/2019 23:58

@RomanticFatigue
But it’s never too late. You’re self confidence should come from yourself and not from how a man has or hasn’t treated you. I think you need some talking to work through the bigger issues. Because it’s not that man.

Spanielmadness · 04/03/2019 23:59

Leave my abusive ex the first time I tried to.

Meandwinealone · 05/03/2019 00:00

@Spanielmadness
But you are here
You did leave eventually. And no one leaves the first time. Literally no one. So you’re nice and normal!! X

greendale17 · 05/03/2019 00:02

Be more careful about how much I ate when I became pregnant !

^This

Spanielmadness · 05/03/2019 00:03

Thanks Meandwinealone - I feel like I failed for letting it go on for so long, so I appreciate you saying that.

Jsmith99 · 05/03/2019 00:04

@Meandwine

The point is that it didn’t collapse, so this being a ‘with the benefit of hindsight’ discussion....

AlmostGrockle · 05/03/2019 00:05

Looked for any job as soon as I left school, and not relied on a half promise of an apprenticeship from a college.

Meandwinealone · 05/03/2019 00:07

@Spanielmadness

If your the type of person who has love and care in your heart, I think you will always take a long time to let go. You don’t want to give up. And always believe in goodness. That has positive and negative outcomes. But overall in life, I think it’s better to be how you are

Meandwinealone · 05/03/2019 00:09

@Jsmith99
Just trying to give you a positive. As we stand at crossroads we all make choices.

You made a wise choice, it just didn’t go your way. So you shouldn’t regret your choice. You might regret the outcome in hindsight, but that’s a different thing all together

Ladiva1971 · 05/03/2019 00:11

I wouldn't do anything differently, the main reason being all the bad decisions and mistakes that I made in the past, have made me the person I am today.

Meandwinealone · 05/03/2019 00:13

@AlmostGrockle

That’s just called hope. And going for hope over “any job” is better than not going for hope. Even if it didn’t work out.
If you’d gone for any job, you might be saying you wished you’d held out.

Swings and roundabouts. But if your not happy. Do something now.

AlmostGrockle · 05/03/2019 00:23

@Meandwinealone, I didn't get on the apprenticeship, that's why I regret holding out for it. I am happy with what I'm doing now.

Cloudyyy · 05/03/2019 00:28

I wish I’d told someone about my home life as a child. I often wish I’d been adopted, I wonder how different my life would’ve turned out!

Meandwinealone · 05/03/2019 00:48

@AlmostGrockle
Oh I see! Sorry. Well at least you tried

LellyMcKelly · 05/03/2019 01:07

Ended it with my ex when I found gay porn in his internet history. Instead I married him and had 2 fantastic kids (which I don’t regret for a second), but I spent 15 years wondering why he didn’t really fancy me, and my self esteem took a massive nose dive. It worked out well in the end, and I have a new partner who is mad about me, but maybe I could have had somebody who was mad about me for those 15 years.

Batsypatsy · 05/03/2019 01:49

I'd have worked harder at school and gone to uni - or followed my dad's career advice.

herecomesthsun · 05/03/2019 03:04

Flowers Wine Cake everyone.

Poppy43 · 05/03/2019 03:36

I would not have smoked
I would never have used sunbeds
I would have tried harder at school
I would have followed my heart and listened to my pe teacher when she told me I had talent
I wouldnt have wasted so much time/effort on a few people I assumed were friends.

MissedTheBoatAgain · 05/03/2019 03:53

Realized that as a young Expat the local women were mostly gold diggers.

MrsTerryPratcett · 05/03/2019 04:01

I wouldn't because I like my life so I worry about a Back to the Future style issue.

But I do wish it was possible to check out another trouser leg of time. I'd see a man I turned down at university. I was an idiot.

There's a great bit in one of my namesake's books where a man is reminiscing and talks about 'what if we had married?'. The woman says, 'yes but what about the terrible fire that swept through our house?' Because you just never know.

windygallows · 05/03/2019 07:34

To invest more time in boyfriends/relationships. I never prioritised it and hence have been alone for most of my adult life.

And to make better decisions about jobs/opportunities.