If you could go back in time and do one thing differently ...

[annie987]

... what would it be?

i would go back to october the 12th 1965 and tell my dad not to kill himself that the 9 year old me and my 8 year old brother need him alive my life would have been so different with him in my life for longer than 9 years

Stop my friend from going out on the day they were killed, leaving behind a young family and a heart broken partner 😢

Probably a different career and possibly a different partner.

I'm not sure there is anything I'd do differently. My life is far from perfect and I've fucked up more than once but I believe my mistakes have helped shape me and the life I've carved out.
I'd spend more time with my granny if I could, and forced her to get medical attention when she had what we now know was a mild heart attack. She died 3 weeks later of a massive heart attack. That was almost 26 years ago and I miss her every single day of my life. She was my rock

Left partner in October 2005.

Hyper-unrealistically?
Realised when I had a good thing in ex and dragged myself out of the way I was acting (which is all inextricably tied up with my childhood), which ultimately ended us.

Unrealistically?
Never taken an office job and got a car.

Realistically?
Joined the gym I am at as soon as I knew about it, rather than chickening out of it for so long.

All 3 things part of the same issue with my self-esteem.

Chosen a different university. I think if I’d made a better choice I’d have got my degree and not married my horrible ex.

Stayed single.

So many... worked harder at school , developed a proper career rather than working for money and hating what i was doing.
Left it longer to start having children, to establish a career
Saved a lot harder, spent more wisely
Spent a lot more time with my children , listening, helping and guiding, instead of being exhausted and barely coping much of the time
Realised the importance of friendship and worked a lot harder at them
Not moved so many times in my life
To have appreciated the kindness and help my in laws gave me a lot more
Not to have ever really got to know my father before he died
I regret the way I have treated people badly in small ways.
Followed the subjects I wanted to study at school instead of being told what to do by my parents. Ditto job.
Chosen a different degree subject altogether
Maybe not to have got married, but stayed single, travelled a lot more and lived for myself not others.

Not taken things at face value so much (particularly the advice from so-called experts), and trusted my gut instinct more.

Can I have two?
Looked after my teeth and tried much much harder at school
Biggest regrets of my life.

Rented put my first flat instead of selling it...I'd be mortgage free by now.

I wish I could have known you can’t love depression away

Worked harder at school and gone to uni.
AlthoUgh as a pp said, your journey makes you who you are, but I'd like to be a less skint version of myself.

@decormad38@
I'm so sorry, that must be very hard, but you have to forgive yourself.

Wish I’d stayed on at uni and done my teacher training. Nobody will encourage me to retrain as everyone says teaching is horrible now but it’s such a big regret I never tried it (dad was terminally ill and I came home to be near him- that but I certainly do not regret)

Everything

Married dh and instead waited for the one

Done a PGCE straight after my initial degree. I’ll never be able to afford to retrain now.

I would have had a caesarean

Being fat

for me i would have never sent my kids to school as school failed them both severely at 11 and 6

my oldest had a nervous break down in y6 caused by school and a bullying y5 teacher

my then y2 child was failed and put to the side and just left to play for 3 years,he couldnt tell me as he was non verbal at the time

at the time i didnt know home education existed and sent them because i "had"to

Not let myself be talked into an abortion

I agree largely with Temporary Permanent but the one I would do is :

Not Write That Letter

It wouldn't change any part of my life now I don't think but it would spare someone else wholly unnecessary heartache

(Nothing to do with affairs)

However my mental state at the time was such that I probably couldn't change that
and I thought I was Doing The Right Thing but I wasn't

I wouldn't have remortgaged our house in 2005. Our house was allegedly worth nearly double what we had paid for it two years before so we got about £25,000 'equity' out of the house. We also fixed for 5 years so missed most of the cheap interest rates - it screwed us over finically and made it almost impossible to move. We had planned to move in about 2010 - we didn't get moved until the end of 2016 as we could t sell out house for enough to have a deposit on a bigger one.

By the time we moved out mortgage was about £3,000 less than we had originally paid for it 😥