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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Man attempts to bully me out of parking space

125 replies

RelaisBlu · 03/03/2019 13:11

There was a parking bay with room for 5 or 6 cars and the last 2 spaces at one end were free so I took the end space. I moved back & forth to make sure I was within the white lines and right up against the end line to give maximum room to anyone parking behind. Whilst I was doing this a man in a Range Rover began to nose aggressively towards me at the end of the bay, as if to force me back into the space behind so that he could take the end space. I stayed firmly in the end space and turned my engine off whereupon he got out and came round to my window. I wound the window down and he asked me to move up. I refused and said I preferred the end space. He rolled his eyes, returned to his car and parked behind. I should also mention there were other spaces available, on the opposite side of the road and further down.

Was I unreasonable? Neither of us raised our voice but his whole manner was entitled and I really resented the initial edging forward. I would never do that - I would hold back, let the driver choose their space and take the one that was left.

When I was younger I would have felt obliged to do as he asked, just because he wanted me to. Not any more.

I also felt certain that if I'd been a man, he would not have behaved like that, which also made me determined to stand my ground.

OP posts:

BoomBoomsCousin · 03/03/2019 15:07

I wouldn’t call his action bullying, just entitled. But YANBU to have parked in your preferred spot.

Dimsumlosesum · 03/03/2019 15:07

Nah some people are just petty and weird.

Original poster

RelaisBlu · 03/03/2019 15:07

No he did not have to wait donquixote. There were several other spaces nearby, as I said earlier

OP posts:

CheerioHunter · 03/03/2019 15:08

"Well done for standing up to him..." "entitled twat" "coercing" etc... 😂🤣

Crikey, there's some touchy fragile people online today about.

Tensixtysix · 03/03/2019 15:09

The posher the car, the more they'll get a disproportianate reply!

Littlebird88 · 03/03/2019 15:10

yup he was an idiot. best ignore and forget. not worth the worry

Hillarious · 03/03/2019 15:10

I've read all OP's comments and the full thread and I'm with flowery on this. Would the OP have moved up for a woman over 40 in a smaller car. From what she says. No. Therefore the "man in a Range Rover" is a red herring. Legally parked, but somewhat selfish.

CheerioHunter · 03/03/2019 15:11

The posher the car, the more they'll get a disproportianate reply!

Stating to just sound like a jealous reaction now. Throw eggs at houses bigger than yours too?

Onceuponacheesecake · 03/03/2019 15:12

I'd have parked as you did. I've been blocked in enough times to know to avoid parking in the middle when there is no need too. He's clearly just a crap parker. If a space is too awkward for someone to get into, then surely it would also be awkward to get out of, so why should op move?

Barrenfieldoffucks · 03/03/2019 15:13

He's an idiot. Waiting to see if you were going to move is one thing, edging forwards and then actually coming over is another.

donquixotedelamancha · 03/03/2019 15:14

No he did not have to wait donquixote. There were several other spaces nearby, as I said earlier

But he was pulling into that one. Of course if he'd realised you were going to pull forward, then back a couple of times and then he'd need to go around you he would have driven to the next space- that is exactly what he did when you said no.

If he hadn't waited he'd have pulled straight in behind you and you would not have been able to reverse.

CandidaAlbicans · 03/03/2019 15:19

YANBU
There is nothing wrong with choosing to park in the end space leaving a space in front. That way you don't risk getting blocked in by thoughtless drivers and you have better access to your boot. It was unfortunate that he couldn't just drive into that particular space, either having to chose one of the other ends spaces or parallel park, but he should've just sucked it up.

donquixotedelamancha · 03/03/2019 15:21

Crikey, there's some touchy fragile people online today about.

I think (with an obvious exception) that perhaps some people may not have understood the logistics. The description is awkward- I initially pictured a normal car park with a range rover trying to muscle in on a preferred bay.

When you realise that OP was just asked to move up from the end of a linear lay-by in order to avoid the car behind reverse parking against traffic, then the 'bullying' becomes a lack of psychic powers on the other driver's part.

CheerioHunter · 03/03/2019 15:27

then the 'bullying' becomes a lack of psychic powers on the other driver's part.

Very much agree

yearinyearout · 03/03/2019 15:34

Why are posters talking about parallel parking? I took the OP’s description to mean it was a parking bay of spaces alongside each other that you drive into?

AWishForWingsThatWork · 03/03/2019 15:49

I would have parked as you did as well if the road was notorious for people cramming in their cars, making it next to impossible to get back out easily or safely. I hate people that leave an inch or two between your car and theirs ... and they are very common in some areas.

He was entitled, but you handled it well.

MrsCBY · 03/03/2019 16:11

Dear god. Women being selfish. Making choices in their own best interests and not those of random passing men in large cars.

Absolutely outrageous. What do women exist for, if not to facilitate the lives of others, especially if those others are male?

Very relieved to see so many right-minded women on here policing that kind of unnatural behaviour, those unacceptable attitudes. Good to see that despicable notion of feminism has clearly not caught on with them at all.

StroppyWoman · 03/03/2019 16:13

I'd say his behaviour was intimidating rather than bullying, but still damned annoying.

nicenewdusters · 03/03/2019 16:18

Well said MrsCBY .

BoomBoomsCousin · 03/03/2019 16:25

How, from what the OP wrote, were his actions even intimidating?

I have no problem with the OP taking the parking spot she wanted.

But some of the comments on here I wonder how some posters ever manage to have a straight conversation with anyone without feeling like the world is ganging up on them. The guy wanted and seemed to expect to get the end parking space. He prepped his car to take that space but when the OP made it clear she was taking it he stopped and instead got out and asked her if he could have. She said no. Driver left. Where is the threat in that? Where is the fear? That is not intimidation (and it is certainly not the bullying the OP claimed).

Yabbers · 03/03/2019 16:33

I might have asked you nicely to do this because my “oversized, gas guzzling, wankmobile” carries a wheelchair and a walking frame and I’ve had problems before with people parking too close to my boot making it impossible to get them in.

But I wouldn’t have bullied you, I’d just have asked nicely. Would you have moved?

donquixotedelamancha · 03/03/2019 16:35

Very relieved to see so many right-minded women on here policing that kind of unnatural behaviour, those unacceptable attitudes.

What has being female got to do with it? Of course the OP can choose not to pull forward, it's no big deal.

But it is a bit selfish when someone is pulling in immediately behind you, to make them reverse park. It inconveniences them and other traffic for no reason. This would be true whatever the sex of the driver.

Most of the disagreement has been of OP claiming bullying. The other driver had no way to know the OP would reverse.

Barrenfieldoffucks · 03/03/2019 16:42

I'm sure if that were the case Yabbers he'd have said so.

Siriismyonlyfriend · 03/03/2019 16:43

The word bullying is bandied absolutely too easily these days by the professionally offended.

Jaxhog · 03/03/2019 16:44

I can't imagine any situation where I would ask someone to move into another parking space just because I wanted that space.

Me either.

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