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AIBU?

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To tell MIL to go home!! Semi-lighthearted

129 replies

Omgstop · 02/03/2019 15:42

NC for this!!😩 Ok so we have an air to water heating and air exchange system (newly built house) and MIL is staying over! She is VERY old school, wakes up EVERY morning and opens the bedroom window. I’m actually ok with this for 10mins etc but she tries to leave it open ALL DAY!!! I am blue In the face trying to explain to her that it is making our system work harder and that it is not needed!!! Everytime I close the window I come back an hour later and the bloody window is open AGAIN!! She is baffled as to how we can prevent damp etc!! I am fed up explaining that the system does it all!! That our house is pretty much airtight and that’s WHY it works so well, that’s why we have no damp, that’s why our house is an ambient temperature (except for when she leaves the flipping window open) I then notice a drop in temp and the heating system is clocking in unnecessarily. aibu to tell her if she doesn’t stop she can go home and open her own windows!! 😭😭😫 rant over!!

OP posts:
Prequelle · 03/03/2019 07:35

Tube thanks for that answer, very informative

anniehm · 03/03/2019 07:36

Wish my house cost so little! Similar sized and pay £130pm year round and sit freezing cold under blankets half the year! Old draughty house with solid walls.

Tubeworker · 03/03/2019 07:42

It is more green. Houses have to breathe. As people have mentioned if the windows aren’t opened and the air exchanged inside the house regularly the air goes stale, smells bad, and grows damp. This causes all sorts of problems- condensation and mould being the biggies.

Normally houses leak air- cracks in the floor, poorly fitting windows, up chimney breasts or whatever. Houses are constantly leaking air: this is felt as a cold draught. While leaking air, houses are also leaking heat. Thus heating systems have to work harder and harder to compensate for the incoming air (which in winter is very cold).

By closing down all air leaks and making the house relatively airtight, those heat leaks are lost. Then by putting a heat exchange on the air pumping system, about 70% (I believe) of the heat is actually retained.

If you have modern walls that are insulated to a high degree (no gaps, around 1-foot of solid PIR insulation, and very carefully closed up around windows/doors) you can achieve “passivhaus” standards. The thermal mass in your walls will compensate for the heat loss in the exchanger. I’ve heard of people who spent a tenner a month on heating in winter. I did also read a post about someone who said mostly they only turn the heating on when their kids aren’t there because without the thermal output of the children the house can grow chilly overnight.

It’s a brilliant system- I wish I had it. If you’re getting a new build I seem to remember the cost being around £10-£15k, and most of that was the heat exchanger itself. It’s apparently not that complex to install (although the design has to be right or you end up with rooms that are sluggish or stale which is bad). OP could probably tell you better about the cost as well. Also she has a water heat exchanger which I’ve not heard of but am off to google once the baby is in bed.

LaMarschallin · 03/03/2019 07:48

It sounds brilliant. If I was having a new build I'd jolly well consider it.
Many thanks, Tubeworker, and kudos for your knowledge.

Guineapiglet345 · 03/03/2019 08:09

@Tubeworker you can retrofit it into old properties but it would be a big, messy job. It obviously wouldn’t contribute much in terms of heating to a draughty old property but it would remove the need to open the windows. You can get systems from ad little as £2k - £3k.

StinkyCandle · 03/03/2019 08:23

you forget the psychological element: I like having my windows opened!

Windows in my office do not open, if I was leaving in a flat in one of these luxury towers, the windows wouldn't open either. One of the small luxury of my house is to have the windows open, see the curtains move in the breeze and feel it. Even in winter I like the feel of cold air in my bedroom.. It's not all about efficiency.

Thank you Tubeworker for the informative post.

LivingDeadGirlUK · 03/03/2019 09:11

Its great this technology is now being used in domestic properties, we have been installing it on commercial properties for yonks and the energy saving is great for both the environment and the pocket.

Back to the OP I think its quiet rude to open windows in winter without asking your host, given they are running their heating. But then my parents used to go mental if we left room doors open let alone windows while the heating is on.

Dermymc · 03/03/2019 10:16

I work in a school with this tech. It stinks, literally it smells bad because the air isn't exchanged enough.

It's also boiling in summer and freezing in winter. Because you can't open windows in summer it's a giant greenhouse with no new air coming in.

Boyskeepswinging · 03/03/2019 10:48

It stinks, literally it smells bad because the air isn't exchanged enough
Exactly the same where I work which is why I wondered if MIL is too polite to mention that the house smells. The OP will be nose blind to her own house's smell.

diddl · 03/03/2019 11:45

I would have thought that it's too cold atm to want a window open all day!

Does the house stay warm overnight so that it might feel stuffy to her when she first wakes up?

That said, a quick air should be enough if that's the case.

Tubeworker · 03/03/2019 12:25

I work in a school with this tech. It stinks, literally it smells bad because the air isn't exchanged enough.

Then it’s badly installed. The whole point is that there is a constant flow of air. You never have stuffy or stale air because there is a constant flow.

This is NOT the same thing as central air/ducted air conditioning. The air that is blown into the house hasn’t been passed through an element and misted- it’s been pushed through a filter and then run through a heat exchange. It will generally come into the room a bit cooler than the air in the room.

MrsCasares · 03/03/2019 13:43

Borrow a tent from your local scouts and put her in it in your. Back garden. She’ll get plenty of fresh air then.

Yamayo · 03/03/2019 14:35

21 degrees in a bedroom would be far too hot to a lot of people.
There's nothing worse than sweating in bed.

System sounds good for heating a house (and cheap) but a lot of people (me includec) prefer cool bedrooms.

Omgstop · 03/03/2019 15:16

@Tubeworker are you my husband!? 😂😂he explains it way better than me...as do you!! And YES as of a month or so after building work...no dusting!!BLISS!!

OP posts:
Omgstop · 03/03/2019 15:18

I work in a school with this tech. It stinks, literally it smells bad because the air isn't exchanged enough

I second what tubeworker said and also with respect I don accommodate 300-1000 hormonal,smelly teens! 😂

OP posts:
ShabbyAbby · 03/03/2019 15:29

First thing I do in the morning is open the windows, last thing at night I close them
I think it would take a lot for me to alter that habit? It's life long

Omgstop · 03/03/2019 15:30

@Tubeworker yes we have air to water, an the heat exchanger, heating is underfloor, the house is not passive but not far off!! The financial outlay was eyewatering 😭 but so far worth every penny 👍

OP posts:
Boyskeepswinging · 03/03/2019 15:53

The financial outlay was eyewatering 😭 but so far worth every penny 👍
Really?! Sorry, I don't consider £90 per month to be a "low" bill. We pay far less than that with good old fashioned central heating.

Youngandfree · 03/03/2019 15:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Boyskeepswinging · 03/03/2019 16:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Omgstop · 03/03/2019 16:20

@Boyskeepswinging yes I said 90 (90.45) pm was the most we have paid. Most months it’s 40-50 and the house is 2200+ sqft so that’s not too bad.thats actual not estimated.

OP posts:
peachgreen · 03/03/2019 19:03

Did you say your house is always 21 degrees OP? That would be waaaaay too hot for me, day or night. I like 18 at most during the day, 16 at night. I'd be opening the window too!

LunafortJest · 03/03/2019 19:07

@Rtmhwales
"Everybody's so weirded out by this system but it's almost the norm in some other countries, or a similar version."

Yes, how do people who live in modern highrises that have aircon and no opening of windows cope? I don't live in the UK but don't they have a very cold and wet climate? I can only imagine opening a window during winter or wet weather would cause mold. I don't know for sure, I could be wrong, but I imagine having open windows in such countries would cause mold and mildew. Where I am in summer it is far too hot to open a window, the aircon is on most of the time. Reverse cycle airconditioners. Cooling in summer and warm in winter are great.

Omgstop · 03/03/2019 19:09

@peachgreen yeah I’m a heat lover 🙈 although it’s working it’s way down to 20 these days. Hubby is complaining. We’ll aim for 19 as a compromise I think!

OP posts:
Esspee · 03/03/2019 19:13

My combined heating/hot water is just over £65 per month and I live in the West of Scotland. Goes on at 6am at 19C then up to 21C from 4pm until 10pm winter and summer.
I think you need to shop around for a cheaper supplier OP.