Or his DP? (Heating)

[GirlOnIt]

We've recently got hive and he's driving me mad! I admit I can feel the cold and I tend to just turn the heating up if I'm cold. I think sometimes even if it says 20 it can feel chilly.

So we've got frigging hive and he's got the app on his phone. So will just turn it down, even when he's not in the house but I am. He's out tonight and he's turned it down, he claims he thought I'd be in bed and I'd forgotten to turn it down. But he's obsessed, he never puts it above19 unless it's really cold out and then he'll stretch to 20. I tend to put it up to 22 which he Noah's about.

If he's not in though he gets no say over the heating does he?

Slightly lighthearted, but I'm considering LTB, if he doesn't stop fucking with the heating when he's not even in the house!

He wasn't like this before hive. He'd mention the heating occasionally usually in a "I'm too hot" way. But he always turned it up for me before he left for work and when we both home if I said I'm cold he'd turn it up.

I think because it's a new toy he's a bit obsessed with it. Last night he said he was showing someone he was out with it and he thought I'd gone to bed and left it on high and the bedroom would be getting too warm. He said sorry when he got in.

And the title obviously should have been is!

Missing the point of the thread entirely would a log burner, gas fire or some other type of room heater in the living room work for you.
We have a log burner so the living room in the evening is sweltering but the rest of the house is cooler. I don’t think it’s the cheaper option though

We have a log burner in the living room @Newyearnewunicorn.

I was in the kitchen/diner last night as was doing something at the table. That's why it was quite high as that room doesn't get as warm. The thermostat is in the living room and do I just turned it up higher so it would warm the kitchen up.
Dp said I should take it into the kitchen with me and then to him it won't be showing 24 when really the room I'm in isn't that. I think he should just not mess with my heating when he's out of the house.

I’ve got hive and I boost it constantly. If DH turned it down when he wasn’t even in, I’d leave him. It’s controlling. I refuse to be cold in my home. When DH is in, we compromise.

We have hive.

Disconnect the hub (square white thing connected to your broadband router).

Without it he can't control it via the app (the app will just say 'heating offline') but you can still control via the thermostat.

I would go apeshit.

I would be fuming if my dp did that. Unless he is solely responsible for the heating bill, you have just as much right to control the heating as him and have it comfortable to you. He's not there, he gets no say

Plus he's a sad bastard for checking the heating when he is out anyway!!

He is a sad bastard @BrusselPout. I can fully see his checking it. That's why he's not allowed one of those doorbell and security cameras that link to your phone. I'm not having him see who's at the door when he's at work.

Agree with ahnowted disconnect from wifi router and then it can only be controlled from the thermostat white box indoors.

We have similar argument about pool temp (summer in Australia). I like pool to be around 30 degrees, he likes 26.
After reading this thread we have decided to compromise on 28 😀

I would flip my lid if someone was doing this to me, it is a form of control, you are not a child for goodness sake.
A while back I was staying at a friend's house for several months whilst she was away, I must admit very kindly rent free as she wanted someone to look after the house basically. When I initially visited whilst she was there it was impossibly warm, far too hot for me. Upon moving in she was in control of the heating with hive and whilst it was ok there were certain times of the day I needed more heat. She had obviously lowered the temperature greatly and kept it switched off for a lot of the day. As I was staying there for free I did not like to raise the subject, but it was not a pleasant feeling to feel powerless regarding having no control of the temperature or when the heating came on or went off.

He sounds like a dick. Tell him not to adjust it again

My house is currently 22 degrees without the heating on - 19 sounds cold! Now, if you're in a strappy top and shorts and could just add a jumper, I see his point about the heating, but his way of going about it is not on.

It is a fact that women feel the cold more than men, and that offices, etc are set up to men's preferred temperature. So stand your ground as a feminist issue (I'm being lighthearted, but also sort of not...)

I can never believe how hot some people keep their houses on these threads, if it was 24 degrees outside we'd all be sunbathing and panic buying paddling pools, that's how hot that is!

But yes, I agree, he shouldn't be controlling the heating when you are home and he isn't.

If mine started opening windows i’d slam them shut on his fingers. It’s bloody outrageous to turn the heating down when you’re not even in the house. A very, very good reason for not having a Hive, thanks for the warning, OP!

How fucking dare he alter the heating when he isn't even there.

I don't like being cold but how people can stand the heating on 28 is beyond me.
Although I do have a relative whose house is like a sauna but then walks round in a vest. Turn the bloody heating down and put a cardy on!

This sounds like he's either very controlling or very ignorant. I hope it's the later

Oh god thermostat wars,this was us last winter.The novelty should wear off but make sure you put the app on your phone too

@AlexaAmbidextra
You wrote exactly what I was thinking!

I will put the app on my phone and tbf he's been saying I should do. The thermostat is in the living room which is quite a small room so that gets warm but if I'm in the kitchen it's not so I put it on more. He looks and things it's 24 in the room and I must have forgotten to turn it down.
He did say to take it with in other rooms so that it doesn't turn off till that room gets to the right temperature. But I can't be bothered.

He's promised he won't mess with the temperature if I'm home anymore.

That's why he's not allowed one of those doorbell and security cameras that link to your phone. I'm not having him see who's at the door when he's at work.

A gadget like that would be useful for your safety, but you can't install one because he would misuse it?

After all your updates he sounds nice, just obsessed with his new toy!

I was a total pain in the arse when we got the smart meter. I wasn’t telling anyone to turn the heating off or take shorter showers or anything though, I was just astounded at how energy guzzling some of our appliances are - the coffee machine - but it doesn’t matter as it’s only on a few minutes, the washing machine 🤷🏻‍♀️ And the old oven. The old oven is hideously guzzly but is being replaced soon with the kitchen renovation.

It was driving me nuts because with nothing being used & the same things plugged in (fridge etc) it can vary a lot from hour to hour 🤷🏻‍♀️🤨🧐🤓🤯

I’ve put it in a cupboard now for my own sanity 🤣

Do you have one schmoozer?

22 sounds really high to me - can't you just put a jumper on? That said some houses are different depending on where the thermostat is and it would drive me mad if DH meddled with it while I was in and he wasn't.