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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu to think 9pm is too late to be ringing someone's doorbell?

57 replies

Whisky2014 · 21/02/2019 21:40

I was in bed, husband downstairs but I didn't hear him get it. I waited too long and the person left. Husband had called asleep on sofa.
But who rings a doorbell at 9pm?! I'm pregnant and tired argh. We live in a small village!

OP posts:
Petalflowers · 21/02/2019 21:42

9pm would be the latest reasonable time. Any later is unreasonable.

covetingthepreciousthings · 21/02/2019 21:43

I think it's too late but depends what the reason is I suppose, might be a neighbour whose in distress or wanting to alert you to something in which case I wouldn't think it would be too late.

Whisky2014 · 21/02/2019 21:45

But id imagine they'd ring again if it was urgent or bad? Both cars are on drive so they know we are in. Hmm

OP posts:
Bananasarenottheonlyfruit · 21/02/2019 22:06

We are barely in from work at 9pm some days. Wouldn't bother me in the slightest.

But this is MN, where nobody takes in parcels for neighbours, and if you do, they must wait for you to deliver it to them at your convenience even if it is three months later. And doorbells must never be rung if you are not expecting visitors, spontaneity if much frowned upon.

RockingMyFiftiesNot · 21/02/2019 22:07

9pm seems reasonable to me, 10pm not

Monty27 · 21/02/2019 22:08

What was the reason? I don't think it's massively late

marvellousnightforamooncup · 21/02/2019 22:11

By 9pm I'm in my jammies, possibly in bed and not up for socialising. It would have to be important or they'd get short shrift from me.

Whisky2014 · 21/02/2019 22:17

I dont know what the reason was, I waited too long expecting husband to get it.
There's definutely a lot of car activity gping on tonight, usually at this time its quiet as a mouse. I had a peak and couldnt see anything.

Bananas,I do take in parcels for neighbours and we also have dinners with them etc. Usually very sociable but meh just think 9pm is late. I get up early, they know we leave early.

OP posts:
MammaSchwifty · 21/02/2019 22:17

A doorstep charity mugger cold-called round one evening after 8pm. He won't be doing that again, the silly boy.

pigsDOfly · 21/02/2019 22:19

I suppose it depends on what time you go to bed as to whether it's too late, but it clearly is for you and that what counts.

I'm usually just about clearing up from dinner at about 8.45/9.00 as I tend to eat quite late, 8/8.30 so 9 wouldn't be late for me. In the summer it's still light out at that time.

10/10.30 I think would be a bit late for a stranger to knock. Again it does rather depend who it is knocking and why.

I'm sure if they want you, they'll knock again at some point, hopefully a bit earlier in the evening. If the person knocking knows you're pregnant then yes, that's inconsiderate of them.

WorraLiberty · 21/02/2019 22:22

Given that you don't know why they rang your doorbell, it's impossible to say whether you're BU to think 9pm is too late.

BlueMerchant · 21/02/2019 22:23

I think it's late to be knocking. I was also going to mention the charity folk.We have had them at 9pm.Very rude.

m0therofdragons · 21/02/2019 22:26

9pm is late for my 7yo dc but as an adult 9pm is 2 hours before bedtime. It's not late at all. I was out for a run at 9pm tonight. But then I've read on mn people stressing about people ringing the doorbell at all so I guess we're all different.

Sparklingbrook · 21/02/2019 22:28

It's not too late here. Might be a neighbour in need.

Hunter037 · 21/02/2019 22:28

Its not that late. If it was happening all the time it would be annoying, but as a one off it wouldn't bother me. Could be lots of reasons...

WorraLiberty · 21/02/2019 22:29

But then I've read on mn people stressing about people ringing the doorbell at all so I guess we're all different.

Yes that's true.

Some MNetters won't answer the door unless the caller has sent a text 24hrs in advance, followed up with an email and a covering letter Grin

CherryPavlova · 21/02/2019 22:31

I think it entirely depends and I would always answer.

Most likely/has happened for me (also in tiny village) are neighbour worried her husband was very ill (he was); youngish mother half a mile away has cut her head and doesn’t know if she needs stitching (she didn’t); neighbours have power cut and wanted to see how localised it was; completely lost DofE teenagers; motorist had injured a deer and hadn’t a clue how to deal with it.

I’d assume it was someone needing help rather than an axe wielding psychopath.

Notcontent · 21/02/2019 22:35

I think it’s too late, but then again I am always amazed how late many people in the U.K. go to bed, including school aged children.

PhilomenaButterfly · 21/02/2019 22:38

I'd tell them to fuck off. I'm in bed by then.

BrizzleMint · 21/02/2019 22:42

I wouldn't answer the door at 9pm unless I was expecting somebody.

Sparklingbrook · 21/02/2019 22:43

It's threads like this that make me appreciate my neighbours.

MereDintofPandiculation · 21/02/2019 22:44

I think up to 9pm is fine. I probably wouldn't answer it if I were alone in the house, especially if it was dark, but I wouldn't feel offended at their knocking.

FrozenMargarita17 · 21/02/2019 22:44

I've had the bloody gousto people knocking on my door at 8:30 before just after DD had gone to bed. Was NOT pleased.

doodleygirl · 21/02/2019 22:45

No, why is it too late?

cheesemongery · 21/02/2019 22:51

My neighbours know to shout me through the letterbox or indeed call me on my phone if there is anything drastically urgent. I take in parcels all the time for both sides, so no, I wouldn't answer the door at 9pm.

We live on quite a main road though that is often used en route home from or to the pub. 7.30pm one night I pulled up to find a bloke pissing in my hedge - got very short shrift from me the dirty bastard!

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