Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to want to have a big celebration for our 10th anniversary?

120 replies

PoppingBubbles · 20/02/2019 13:21

It's a non point right now, as we have a couple of years to go yet. However, am interested if it's the 'done thing'?

I've seen quite a few threads saying it's not OK to do it, and no one cares as it's not seen as a 'special' one.

I think it is though, and love a good celebration. We don't get enough of them in this lifetime I think Grin

WIBU to do something special? Party / meal / something else. Has anyone else done something nice to celebrate? Or attended one they enjoyed?

OP posts:
DrPimplePopper · 20/02/2019 14:49

I think it's nice to do if you know your friends and family are up for it and social (ours aren't at all!) Life's too short to worry about what's the done thing or not, if it's something you'd all enjoy, why not. I know 25/50 are big milestones but if you've had a rough 10 years it can feel like a huge achievement! We are similar, been through so much and I'm proud we got through it together, so we might want to celebrate when we reach it.

areyoureallysaying · 20/02/2019 14:53

I think DrPimplePopper has hit the nail on the head. If you know your friends would on receiving an invite to your Decade Bash in a positive manner then go ahead.
My mates would come to a "10 minute anniversary of the day I did anything party" any excuse for food, booze and a good laugh

5foot5 · 20/02/2019 14:58

I have never heard of anyone having a do for anything less than 25 years.

TBH celebrating at 10 sounds almost like you don't expect to make it to any of the biggies!

entertainme · 20/02/2019 14:59

We did - we combined it with a joint 40th (I realise this is pretty outing!). Not all our family came though; some live several hours away, and we made it very clear we didn't expect them to travel for it. We made it pretty low key; we hired a hall and told people they could drop in when they liked - there were plenty of refreshments (which we provided) but no meal. It was a lovely way to catch up with lots of people who live fairly locally without breaking the bank. There was no 'look at us' moment, and having people come over several hours meant we got to actually talk to them. It worked for us - you may, of course, want to do things completely differently, and that's OK too!

Nottobesoldseparately · 20/02/2019 14:59

I'll probably throw a party for our 10th, but it will be at home and no one will actually know.

I love a good party and would have them all the time, However DH quite rightly points out that they are expensive, so I try and have a good reason to throw one. And being married 10 years is a good enough one for me.

Our family and friends would just be told I fancied a party and would accept on that basis alone.

FadedRed · 20/02/2019 15:01

We did, but we do have a reputation for throwing parties, so any excuse! We also did for silver and ruby. No presents request on the invitations (though there were a few jokey ones given). A friend who married in their forties had a ‘thirty three and a third’ as they didn’t think they’d make it to gold and wanted to celebrate.
You know your family and friends- go for it if you want to.

Areyoufree · 20/02/2019 15:01

I don't think it's weird - I loved my wedding day, because of all of the people who were there. I would probably pitch it as a 'wedding reunion' party, and make it clear that we didn't want gifts or anything. Just a chance to get a wonderful bunch of people together again.

warmandfuzzycat · 20/02/2019 15:02

Well why not? And happy anniversary! Grin

Honeyroar · 20/02/2019 15:04

We just passed our tenth anniversary. We were going to go on a special holiday, but have had a year of bad illnesses and disasters, so couldn't do it. I'd have felt embarrassed having a party (sorry). Anniversaries should be celebrated between the couple, in my opinion. It just feels like you're ramming the "look how in love we are" down everyone's throats.

Redglitter · 20/02/2019 15:05

How come it's acceptable for birthday parties, stag or hen dos, baptisms etc, yet an invite to a nice meal out, or a little celebration is seen as self centred, 'as it's only 10th'? I'm genuinely interested

Because other than the birthdays the rest are one off occasions - like your wedding was.

10th isnt a special anniversary. Its no more important than 12th or 15th etc By all means celebrate with your husband but a party seems a bit over the top.

downcasteyes · 20/02/2019 15:08

I don't think it matters what other people do! Different families and different groups of friends have radically divergent ideas on this anyway.

I'm going to have a massive celebration for my 10th anniversary because my wedding was epically shit! My friends actually suggested I did this recently, so I'm pretty sure they will want to come. If people think it's weird or don't want to show up or have other things on, that's totally cool. It's an invitation, not a court summons!

GiBlues · 20/02/2019 15:10

We had our 10th wedding anniversary in late summer last year, so we had a bbq with booze and music it’s was all very relaxed.
We had a fab time and I think our guests did too. We did tell people no gifts though.

There’s so much shite going on in this world, if you want to celebrate and do something nice your anniversary then do it.

downcasteyes · 20/02/2019 15:10

Ooops posted too soon - just wanted to finish by saying, if you want to go for it, then do. You don't need an excuse to have a party anyway - plenty of people just have one because they feel like it - so if you didn't want to make a big 10th anniversary thing, you could just say "We're having a party" without giving a reason. (I know someone who actually did that for their wedding).

JangledBat · 20/02/2019 15:21

We had a family party, at home, for our 10th - it was sort of an excuse for a get-together.

I have a lovely photo from the night of DM, DG, DD and me. It was the last time we were all together because, very sadly, my DM died suddenly a couple of weeks later, then my DG followed her just months later.

I'm so glad we had that lovely evening all together.

downcasteyes · 20/02/2019 15:23

Flowers jangled. What a rough time you have been through.

PalmTree101 · 20/02/2019 15:26

If you like and are good at hosting parties, then go for it :-)

PalmTree101 · 20/02/2019 15:27

10 year anniversary is a 'better' reason than "summer BBQ' or "xmas drinks" which are common party reasons.

JangledBat · 20/02/2019 15:27

downcasteyes Thanks - it was a horrid year.

It was a long time ago now though - it was our 27th anniversary last month

Myimaginarycathasfleas · 20/02/2019 15:41

As a couple it's a lovely milestone, but no-one else is going to be interested, sorry. Wedding anniversaries are not really cause for celebration unless they are biggies that suggest years of endurance!

Hollowvictory · 20/02/2019 15:45

And yet everyone came to our anniversary party and had a brilliant time. Perhaps my friends are nice people that enjoy a celebration and party whereas a lot of people on here would crawl over hot coals before they'd celebrate at an anniversaries party 🙄😉😂 #nofun

flowery · 20/02/2019 15:50

"As a couple it's a lovely milestone, but no-one else is going to be interested, sorry"

I suppose it depends whether people consider a party or whatever it is to be a chore or something to be enjoyed. If people will enjoy it, no suitably significant reason is needed anyway. As pp said, people have summer BBQs or Christmas drinks for no particular reason and people come.

On the other hand if the event is something people would endure rather than enjoy, then I can see that they would not want to come unless they feel the reason is sufficient justification to put them through the ordeal.

bullyingadvice2017 · 20/02/2019 15:51

Glad I didn't do that. Thought we were forever. I'd have felt even more humiliated about my wonderful soon to be ex husband shagging his student if we had had a party not 12 months before!
Not saying yours is. But you never know what is round the corner.

Original poster
PoppingBubbles · 20/02/2019 15:58

@bullyingadvice2017 I'm sorry to hear of your troubles at the moment - that's really sad Sad

OP posts:
Whoops75 · 20/02/2019 16:10

Would I go, yes
Would I think you at notions- also yes

Do it to please yourself, it’s pretty meaningless to others.

Choud1616 · 20/02/2019 16:12

I celebrate every anniversary to the max, but I personally feel like wedding anniversaries are for the couple to celebrate. I don't really care how long anyone else has been married. Only exception being my parents 50th which we (their children) threw them a party for. Apart from that I just celebrate with my husband.