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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to wonder why people without kids are on mumsnet?

253 replies

Workingmummyguilt · 17/02/2019 18:37

Just that really, noticed recently lots of posts from people where poster says they don’t have kids/don’t want kids/ no plans to have kids etc and just wondering why, then, they are on the forum in the first place. Not saying they shouldn’t be , hey whatever floats your boat and wouldn’t tell anyone what they can/can’t do , just I don’t really understand why you’d want to be ...

OP posts:
Biancadelrioisback · 17/02/2019 20:31

Of course anyone can join this and any other forum. The bizarre part for me is when people who actively dislike children comment on posts from people asking advice about their children and just start calling them names like "little brats". Fair enough if you don't like children but just avoid those threads otherwise you just look like a hateful dick

NCjustforthisthread · 17/02/2019 20:32

You need to stay out of AIBU if you think this was harsh - I think you’ve had an easy time on this thread. Maybe netmums for you.

Mmmhmmm · 17/02/2019 20:44

This...again...

Original poster
Workingmummyguilt · 17/02/2019 20:46

@minniemountain no it doesn’t concern me in the slightest , I didn’t say I was concerned, just interested that’s all. I hadn’t realised it was so varied and I genuinely would not personally have signed up to it prior to becoming a mum myself. I guess I was just trying to understand what brought people here that’s all, somewhat naively it would appear, I didn’t realise some would feel the need to comment just to put someone (me) down. I’ve not really explored the forum beyond the parenting bits as that’s what the last year of my life personally has been dominated by, now I’m back to work after a tough time during my maternity leave and have some me time on the train was just trying to connect , maybe I shouldn’t have bothered...

OP posts:
nos123 · 17/02/2019 20:56

I don’t mind as long as the people who moan about hating kids go away

NCjustforthisthread · 17/02/2019 21:01

Trying to connect with who? People on the internet? Or did you just mean you want to only connect to mums? Surely you know this is a forum open to anyone?

MinnieMountain · 17/02/2019 21:06

All you had to do was look at the talk subject headings. And realise the AIBU is a snakepit (which I presume you know now).

BartonHollow · 17/02/2019 21:06

Are you saying you wouldn't have bothered signing up if you had known you'd have to contend with THE POSTS OF THE CHILDLESS or that you regret the thread? Because I can't tell from that last comment

Choosinganame · 17/02/2019 21:07

Workingmummy - welcome to mumsnet and please don't let this thread put you off.
It's a perfectly reasonable question. If you went on a car forum you would be surprised if the people there didn't have (or want) a car for example.
I personally came onto mumsnet 6 years before having kids. I liked the varied discussions and debates which I stumbled across purely by accident.
It has so much more to offer than just parenting advice.

AIBU, although entertaining at times, is full of rottweilers people wanting an argument and isn't really representative of the forum as a whole which is generally friendly and supportive.

ImNotKitten · 17/02/2019 21:08

Not this again.

Brilliant first response. OP, this is the biggest female interest site in the UK. The topics are so diverse and mumsnet pops up as an answer to almost any question you type into google. Not exactly rocket science to see why it draws in women regardless of whether they have children or not.

ValleyoftheHorses · 17/02/2019 21:09

I honestly MN for help from the infertility and antenatal results boards and never left. I eventually had a healthy child- if I hadn’t am I not welcome? Shock

Claw001 · 17/02/2019 21:13

You posted in AIBU, is not about kids! Grin

CurbsideProphet · 17/02/2019 21:15

I didn't realise I needed to have had children to post on threads about TV progs Hmm It's a shame that threads like this are started, as there are sections for coping infertility, life limiting illnesses, and coping with elderly parents. Posters like the OP come across at best as unintelligent and worst as attention seeking creeps who deliberately want to start a big bun fight that will be picked up by the daily fail.

FissionChip5 · 17/02/2019 21:17

maybe I shouldn’t have bothered

Yup.

Redglitter · 17/02/2019 21:19

I find it odd that non parents are on a parenting forum

If you take the time to look around the site youll see the parenting element is a very small part of things.

Nice for a new member to come on and be so judgemental though

GlitterPixie · 17/02/2019 21:20
Biscuit
Vulpine · 17/02/2019 21:32

Jeez you lot are the judgemental ones.

chelsee13 · 17/02/2019 21:35

Guys, this site has appealed to me for all the support I can get. Leave her alone she only asked a simple question, I was always under the impression it was a parents forum, I'm sure she didn't mean any harm. @Workingmummyguilt I did wonder the same before I realised how many other topics were covered!! Don't worry 😘😘

Original poster
Workingmummyguilt · 17/02/2019 21:37

Thanks @choosinganame
@redglitter, if you had actually taken the time to read my posts you would see that I just was genuinely interested in what had led people here initially, not saying anyone shouldn’t be here and have stated that clearly on a number of occasions.

Up until now my main link to the forum has been from the daily email which almost exclusively has links to AIBU thread, I’d no idea there were so many more, hopefully nicer, more supportive, less judgmental threads where people actually bother to engage respectfully.

I’m done now and will leave the trolls to their trollling. Thanks to those who replied nicely and for sharing your stories, hope to chat on other threads, I won’t be back to this one

OP posts:
PurpleDaisies · 17/02/2019 21:42

People aren’t trolls. It’s bloody frustrating to have people question why you’re here every five minutes. That’s why you’ve had the response you’ve had.

SilverySurfer · 17/02/2019 21:43

I couldn't have children, shoot me. I have zero interest in the Boards specifically about pregnancy, children and childcare but there are plenty left to interest me. If you're this shocked at us non-mothers being on here it might push you over the edge to learn that men post here too.

Have you ever tried Netmums? It's pink with lots of talk about mamas and bubs and huns [shivers] oh and no swearing.

chelsee13 · 17/02/2019 21:43

Don't listen to any negativity @Workingmummyguilt , forums like this should just be filled with support and kindness. I deleted Facebook many years ago because of these sorts of comments, I'm disappointed to find them on this site. Stay strong Blush

PurpleDaisies · 17/02/2019 21:45

forums like this should just be filled with support and kindness

How is it supportive or kind to question why posters without childreb are here?

NotAgainSilly · 17/02/2019 21:45

Don't listen to any negativity @Workingmummyguilt , forums like this should just be filled with support and kindness

Yeah I mean how very dare people not have hive minds and think differently to each other. Whatever next hey.

chelsee13 · 17/02/2019 21:46

It was only a question, everyone teaming up on her is not that.