to think my parents are the most technically-useless out there?

[SileneOliveira]

My parents are mid-70s. Both had professional careers where they didn't have to use computers before they retired 15 or so years ago. (Primary teaching and dentistry). They are totally and utterly incompetent with anything technological.

I had a phone call at 11.59pm last night from Dad's mobile. (An old Motorola brick). Nobody spoke when I answered. So the obvious conclusion is that something is terribly wrong. Called back on the landline, a very grumpy Mum answered. She had no idea what was going on and why had I got her out of her bed? Fuck me, if you can't even "drive" a basic Motorola flip phone you've got problems and why are you tawtting about with it at midnight anyway?

They also think I'm being incredibly unreasonable in asking them to take their mobile when I collect them from the airport. As the airport has no free drop-off zone I've asked them to call me when they're physically walking out of hte airport so I can scoot into the 10 minutes for £2 zone and get them. This is apparently unreasonable as I can phone the airport and find out when the plane landed and make a guess as to how long it will take them to clear passport control and get their luggage. (If it wasn't a late night flight I'd be telling them to get the bus).

I have never sent or received a text from my parents. The would think Siri was a new Lebanese restaurant.

When I read about people's parents facetiming them, or a family WhatsApp group my face is like this . It's so very alien to me.

Anyome else got parents like this???

Oh and before the armchair medics pile in, they have neither autism nor dementia.

Just a big case of "we're far too good for all that modern tecnology nonsense". They've always been like that and it drives me and my brother nuts.

those people had to teach you how to use a SPOON ffs.

My DF is great. Skype and WhatsApp has really improved our ability to communicate (lives over seas). He is all over social media and has a look over the kids school tapestry style apps. He was also a dentist once coincidentally.

My dad struggles with technology but I’m patient and show him as many times as he needs how to do things like send texts.
Like he says “well I had to teach you how to use a spoon”.
If your parents have never used computers/mobiles it will be a completely alien thing to them.

Haha cross post with @waffilyversati1e for the spoon thing

If Karma is real your children will be telling the world how useless you are in years to come when technology overtakes you.

Worried sick when the mother stopped answering the telephone. Drove for an hour to find her happy as a clam in front of bargain hunt. She'd been trying to answer the new TV remote.

My dads not too bad, he pretty much uses all tech, sometimes badly, but he has a good go.

Mother on other hand is far worse I think than your parents! And she's younger!! She completely shuns it all and won't even turn her mobile on! Won't use the computer or even a digital camera! It's mad.

I think it's a pride thing. She has a real issue about not being good at stuff and if she thinks she won't be very good at something, she won't even try.

My MIL bought a car with bluetooth but it doesn't work. When you call her whilst she is driving it beeps rather than ringing.
MIL believes that this is what it should do and that it is beeping to tell you she is driving.

It's not so much that they cant, but they won't. We offered them an old smartphone last time I upgraded. Total looks of disdain. What would we use THAT for?

This isn't a new thing. My mother for years flat refused to use an ATM to get cash out and would insist of writing cheques for cash and presenting them at the bank.

My mother is the same. It has massively come back to bite her now she can’t drive as she can basically do nothing for herself.

HMRC still insist on cheques for some transactions.

NatWest insist on fax.

My mum wanted to watch The Crown after I told her about it.

Fine. Went round with DS, he signed her up with Netflix on her iPad, showed her how to use it, we pootled through to the living room to show her where it was on the telly.

Picked up the remote - big red ‘Netflix’ button on the remote control.

Pressed it. Showed she was on episode three of The Crown already. Her telly came with Netflix ready installed.

Cancelled subscription, banged head on wall for a bit, went home - leaving her happily on episode 3 of The Crown.

Sigh.

Asking to call leaving airport - YANBU
whingeing about them not being good with technology - YABU

I don’t get the spoon analogy. All babies need to be taught to use a spoon. Because they’re babies. That’s a stupid analogy.

OP mine aren’t quite as bad but the treating the (ancient) mobile phone as something to be taken out of the house and switched on and used in Particular Occasions Only drives me nuts. My mum has just bought an iPhone as she’s not too bad now but a couple of years ago my mum has a sore leg after a fall and I was really worried and told her to go to out of hours (I thought she might have a DVT it turned out to be cellulitis) and of course I was trying to phone them to check everything was OK, they hadn’t even taken the bloody phones to the walk in centre with them

My sister went round one day and they were sitting watching the telly and the picture was green, it was “broke” and they didn’t know how to fix it. One of the leads in the back had come loose so my sister pushed it in and hey presto. And not forgetting the time my dad managed to put a photo of a pothole as his fb profile pic. Amusing but also a bit frustrating

Mr parents don’t trust ATM. But they do have iPads and have now learned after many many hours of lessons to text me when I’m at work and not phone me. I wrote instructions ... click symbol ... click my name ... type message ... click send arrow.

It’s not intuitive for them. Dad takes mobile when mum reminds him but never turns it on as he thinks it’s only for him if he needs to call.

I feel your pain about the airport saga. Personally one time I’d leave them waiting an hour and just say oh you cleared baggage and customs quick. Perhaps use your phone next time. Pick your battles !

If Karma is real your children will be telling the world how useless you are in years to come when technology overtakes you.

Yep I fully expect it I already frequently get the eye roll off my pre teen kids for my prowess

My DH is very much like this. He has a mobile phone, but he only switches it on when he needs to use it never and turns it back off immediately afterwards. He uses paper maps and post it notes rather than the sat nav in his car. He can't work the tv remote controls.

It's my DF with the apple tv and apple play in the car, he's Bluetoothing music left right and centre from his phone/ipad and Alexa. Well, he and Alexa aren't getting on and he's still using his clockwork timers for the lights but he's working on ITTT programmes for it all on the off chance Alexa decides to understand his accent. He's got his own YouTube channel as well, much to my DC disgust. He goes into old people's homes and gets them set up on phones/tablets etc.

It's not age, it's mindset.

f Karma is real your children will be telling the world how useless you are in years to come when technology overtakes you.

my teens already think that. But the key difference is that i'm willing to learn.

My mum gave up on the Internet because my bloody cousin kept sending her spam "emails with funny pictures attached" which took hours to load. Yes, she was on dial up.

I have gone through getting broadband installed, explaind how different it is, offered to pay, offered to be there when "the men" come round to install it, offered to buy her a new computer /laptop whatever would work best but no "no I've finished with the internet darling after all those emails Sharon used to send me, they made me so cross! " MUM THAT WAS DIAL UP IT'S NOT LIKE THAT NOW! "No no no it made me so cross. .." etc etc.

She is missing out on so much.

Ha ha when I read the OP I thought, wow your parents have mobiles?!

Technology has completely passed my PIL by. To the extent that they have never used an ATM. FIL still goes to the bank weekly to withdraw the housekeeping money that he gives to MIL. It beggars belief.

They're both bright people and we've tried to gently introduce them to technology a gazillion times. We've patiently explained how it could benefit their lives eg Skype to communicate with DS etc. We even bought them a laptop but it's never been used, despite giving clear instructions of one syllable.

They just seem to bumble along in their analogue world using cash and cheques. I've pretty much washed my hands of it now as it's clear they are not going to change.

Honestly, I think you could gain a lot by recognising that they got through decades of life, career and family responsibilities without needing these extra fripperies which yes, can be useful but which, if you cannot see a way of living your everyday life without, are controlling you and not the other way around.

Maybe ask and learn from how they managed to plan things, meet people and function as useful, reliable members of society without relying on tech.

I know that tech does add things that make our lives better e.g. skype / facetime, mobiles - sometimes. But people's over-reliance and obsession with them is a massive thief of time and creator of unecessary anxiety.

Unless your parents have serious health issues, or have pre-arranged an alarm call protocol with you, I'd have thought 'pocket call', phoned or texted that mobile but certainly wouldn't have called the landline and woken people up.

Jeepers they’re in their 70’s? Get over it, they ain’t gonna change now!

I know it's annoying, but I suppose they think they got this far without it, why bother now? Or maybe they're getting their revenge for sleepless nights and toddler/teenage tantrums, by pretending they're technologically inept, when secretly they're all over it!

My 87 year old uncle is a prolific Facebook user - puts me to shame!

Is there something on line that would get them interested? My parents are about 5 years younger than yours. They are reasonably tech savvy, although helped by using computers at work pre retirement.
What made them tech converts at home was finding something that they loved. For my mum it is Trip Advisor and planning holidays. For my dad it is getting his favourite newspaper straight to his tablet. They both love me sending pics of the grandchildren via WhatsApp.