Sex on special occassions

[BabyCakes234]

So last night Dp and I went out for a lovely v day evening. I was really up for sex until I got home and changed my mind. When he tried to initiate I told him I didn’t want to and he said okay.

I told him I wasn’t going to make myself give in for special occasions like birthdays or valentines and such if I just didn’t feel like it because it would set a standard up for the rest of our life.

I feel bad though, should I make the effort to be intimate on special occassions or is ‘I’m not in the mood’ a perfectly good excuse not to?

He is lovely and hasn’t made me feel bad at all, this is all my thoughts on my own. We have sex regularly, I’m just specifically talking about occasions

Right.

It seems you made a ridiculously big deal out of not wanting sex.

Cool story bro.

“Give in”?

Wut?

You're massively over thinking it. Your partner didn't mind, so why is it bothering you? Don't want sex, don't have sex. Even on special occasions

Oh my god this made me laugh (and I need that today, so thanks!)

Your DH tried to initiate sex. You declined. He said ok. You then gave him a lecture on your rights to say no and the future of your relationship 😂 excellent!

If you don't want sex, just say you don't want it. What's the big deal? It doesn't sound like your DP was upset, so you're massively over thinking this.

Not sure what the point of this is?

early on I told dh, either take me out for a slap up meal, or take me to bed, but I can't do both

stop stressing

Bloody hell! Would a "nah not up for it tonight" not suffice?

Give in?

You have sex once on Valentines night and it's a standard for the rest of your life!

You know what, he's maybe thinking thank god she said no, or I'd be expected to be up for it every valentines night!

You wanted sex.

You changed your mind.

Partner was totally fine.

You think this will have an impact in the rest of your life?

ok then.

@steppemum come on, tell us what he chose!

You have sex once on Valentines night and it's a standard for the rest of your life!

I like the idea that five years from now her husband is going to try to initiate sex on Valentine's day, and when she says no, he'll come back with, "but we did it on Valentine's day 2019!"

"Give in" not envy!

No one has to feel obliged whatever the day. Does not seem such an U AIBU to me. YANBU

Half term nonsense?

I've probably shagged on every day in the calender

I'm going to be a busy lady from now on.

Not Xmas day surely? I'd explode.

So @BabyCakes234 I'm assuming you've never done it on previous VDs? Otherwise it would already be expected for the rest of your lives?

What about if you do it on a Tuesday? Would that become an expectation?

Ha ha, well, obviously sometimes we go out and sometimes not

@BreakYourselfAgainstMyStones

I have a "special occasion" bj that was obviously performed yesterday as it was a special day. Usually reserved for Christmas/Easter/bank holiday type of occasions.
Dp took the day off work especially

How old are you?

cool bro, story