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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Tenth thread on this topic. But fuck me the pain?

109 replies

DameIfYouDo · 14/02/2019 03:03

I have a period. Cry me a river. God help me.
But AIBU to not fucking be able to cope with the pain?
Why the fuck do we need to take Nurofen and Paracetamol every fucking month?
Who the fuck died and decided ok, let's torture women for the rest of their lives.
I can't figure out why it could be biologically acceptable.
Bare with me. I'm in pain. Ignore my rantings.

OP posts:
abbsisspartacus · 14/02/2019 04:03

On a thread about period pains someone pops on to say you sound angry and irrational? Hmm fucks sake

Gin because it helps when you run out of painkillers

JingsMahBucket · 14/02/2019 04:06

All the posters saying “this is not normal period pain” have no fucking clue what they’re talking about and should consider themselves bloody lucky. Lots of women have insanely horrible period pains without it being endometriosis or cysts. We’re just unlucky and it’s biological.

Just because you’ve never experienced period pains that stop you dead in your tracks or leave you breathless doesn’t mean it’s not normal. Try having a tiny smidge of empathy and don’t shame a fellow woman who’s in horrendous pain.

kateandme · 14/02/2019 04:06

my mum suffered with horrible pain.all the tests done and nothing more was wrong.
I hated having to see her in such pain so I feel you op.big hugs.
when the pan cupboard slammed lots more we new we were being warned :)
she is the strongest person I know too but her periods flattened her.

Original poster
DameIfYouDo · 14/02/2019 04:17

I'm ok now. Pain is only starting again now. I have taken nurofen.
I think I am taking this hard because I just got on with it before. Now I'm questioning why we have to put up with it. And then men take the piss out of us for it. We're entirely irrational etc. No, we're in fucking pain honey bunch and how would you like to see this foot hit your head? I blame it on my Pilates and boxing classes. Idiot.
You try being in agony for a few days and see just how fucking nice you are.

OP posts:
NutElla5x · 14/02/2019 04:22

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Original poster
DameIfYouDo · 14/02/2019 05:06

NutElla, you're not really a nice person. Please stop commenting.

OP posts:
Lovestonap · 14/02/2019 05:41

Note to self, don't try and distract OP with humour, it didn't go well for NutElla....... 😂

Ullupullu · 14/02/2019 05:45

If standard painkillers don't work, ask GP what can be prescribed. Codeine does nothing for me either but I was prescribed mefanamic acid (take it as soon as you start bleeding) and it changed my life. For some women the cramps are similar to labour. A good GP will listen.

Mayrhofen · 14/02/2019 06:21

I also feel your pain and for me the worst were when I was peri menopausal, the pain made me gasp for breath and went right down my legs too, as well. Standard pain relief didn’t touch it. I used to feel so sorry for those poor women in days gone by who had to endure it without any medication.

No wonder it was called the curse.

ShortandSweet96 · 14/02/2019 06:27

I'm the same! Agony, so much so I can't stand up straight. It really does affect my everyday life that time of the month.

But have you ever been in so much pain you've tried to call in at work and then have to explain you want the day off for period pain?! I always look and feel like a right idiot. So now I just grin and bare it, I've taken more than the recvomened dose of pain killers before, not by alot, usually doubling up, but it's that bad I couldn't care less! Anything to stop the pain..

Nacreous · 14/02/2019 06:30

I switched to taking the pill but for 3 months at a time instead of 3 weeks. Doesn't get rid of the pain, does make it infrequent enough to be manageable.

Sorry you're in pain OP, I hope it calms down soon.

PositiveVibez · 14/02/2019 06:30

Its ridiculous we have to suffer like this every month really, you'd think there would be an answer by now

If men had periods, there would be!!

Omgineedanamechange · 14/02/2019 06:32

I hear ya OP. I’ve never been able to fathom the evolutionary advantage of periods. All the pain and bleeding like a bastard for a week, it’s all I can do to function day to day, much less defend myself and any kids from hungry sabre tooth tigers, while clubbing a passing mammoth to death for lunch.

WallisFrizz · 14/02/2019 06:44

Have you ever been to the GP for this though? Have they always been like this?

The quickest of google searches says if has only been like this after years of normal periods then it is a sign of endometriosis or fybroids.

It could just be period pain but surely worth checking out. Sympathies either way.

Janethevirgo · 14/02/2019 06:50

My period pain used to be so bad that if they’d offered me N epidural for it it gladly have taken it.
After years of trying different things from gp I got referred to the hospitality and was fitted with a mirena coil, it took a few months to settle but after that it was wonderful and I’m now on my second one and I can’t believe I struggled for so long

CrimpBrunette · 14/02/2019 07:00

OP, PP are trying to help you by saying 8/10 pain ISN'T NORMAL, you just seem to be insulting everyone. See a doctor, periods should not be this painful.

UnperfectLife · 14/02/2019 07:01

Periods are a terrible flaw in the design of the human reproductive system. I suffered terrible pain from the very start. Only when I'd had 2 children, one without any pain relief, did I realise the period pain was similar in intensity to labour- it just didn't last as long.
I've lived most of my adult life on the pill. Even now in my 50s, widowed for 8 years without even a whiff of sex, I'm still on the pill because otherwise I'd live my life in fear of when my period might come. When I was younger, i'd rolled around in agony at school, on trains, parks...wherever I was' caught out'. I remember losing my vision once or twice.
Think about the pill with no gaps- subject to doctor's advice of course. Unfortunately we can't change the design....

WinkysTeatowel · 14/02/2019 07:01

Interesting article about why women struggle to get the right diagnosis here. You haven't said what steps you have taken to get the cause of your period pain investigated, it's definitely worth pursuing, an 8/10 should not be accepted at the norm.
In the meantime, I hope you're feeling better because it is shit.

isshoes · 14/02/2019 07:01

OP I’m really sorry you’ve been in so much pain. I hate period pains - I’m due on, and I have to have a hospital procedure tomorrow that will require me to lie still for several hours, so won’t be able to move around to find relief.

However, I did have a little chuckle at your use of the phrase ”Who the fuck died and decided ok, let's torture women for the rest of their lives.”. I don’t think that phrase works like that. I think it’s just ‘who died and made you Queen/in charge”.

PetuliaBlavatsky · 14/02/2019 07:02

I read an article recently that was discussing the fact that there was no clinical reason for women taking the pill to stop it for a week each month to have a bleed. No logical reason behind it at all, it's been found to be fine to take it continuously and stop yourself having periods completely.
I used to have the depo injection which stopped my periods completely (except for when we were having babies), it's unbelievably freeing not to have to worry about periods at all.
Could you investigate options like that? It's shit that you are suffering so much.

HeckinHell · 14/02/2019 07:03

OP, I hear you. But please go see your GP if it’s that painful!

I had bad periods for my whole life, was crippled with the pain, and they only seemed to be getting worse every month. Then eventually (last year, after years of seeing doctors about it) got a GP to understand that I wasn’t just “making a fuss about something normal” and he referred me to a gynaecologist. Ultrasounds suggested my myometrium was thickened, my first gynae said as there were no cysts there was nothing wrong, but I continued to insist it wasn’t right, asked to transfer to a different gynaecologist and was sent for diagnostic laparoscopy. Long story short, I had adenomyosis, my left ovary was like something from a b movie, and I ended up having a total hysterectomy at the end of last year.

So many people minimise how much women can go through with periods; I’ve always said we have a design flaw! Women are very often dismissed when they complain about the pain, but if you know you’re struggling you have to make someone listen! Totally, completely understand you being fucked off with being so uncomfortable every month.

PookieDo · 14/02/2019 07:04

It is all well and good everyone saying ‘see a doctor’ but in reality they don’t fully understand or know how to help

I’ve had 5 years of extreme heavy blood loss, fibroids, womb ablation, chronic anaemia etc etc

Guess what. I still have heavy painful periods despite having a surgical intervention and when I told the gynae he just said ‘oh dear well it doesn’t work for everyone’

Mostly the issue for women is age
‘You are too young for a hysterectomy’
Take all of these pills
Or you are made to feel like you are making it up

Iggly · 14/02/2019 07:06

Instead of being a martyr, get to the doctor.

I used to have bad periods when I wasn’t looking after myself- not drinking enough water, low iron and vitamin B.

But it could be something else.

Megan2018 · 14/02/2019 07:08

I’ve never experienced painful periods, I work with lots of women who don’t either so I don’t agree that this is normal. You should seek medical advice.

AwsomeName · 14/02/2019 07:09

Go see the Gp.