AIBU to be pissed off my dh has friend round while I'm ill in bed

[Mydietstartstomorrow]

Both me and my ds (12) have this horrible lurgy flu bug thing and have been in bed since Friday night. Dh has come home from work this evening and has his friend round (regular visitor to say the least) and they have been drinking downstairs all night. Is it just me being a bit precious and maybe overly emotional as I feel like shit, but think that if your partner is that unwell it's a bit out of order to have friends over for a jolly sesh?! Dh brought him up earlier to help him bring some food up to us (very appreciative of food and waiter service) but not really appreciating him coming into my room when I feel so ill and not seen a shower in nearly 4 days! Also I have the bedroom door open as the room gets stuffy with the central heating on and he's up and down past my room using the lav! AIBU to be annoyed at dh for this?!

Having had proper 'flu, it is definitely not unreasonable to still be in bed since Friday. Having surgery/head injuries is a different kettle of fish.

If OP has 'flu, then I'm not surprised she doesn't want to be disturbed and to have a bit of privacy/dignity.
DH is not unreasonable to want a friend around but if they are getting drunk then it is a bit unfair.

Hope you are feeling better soon OP although I suspect it'll be a couple of days yet.
Don't make the mistake I did and try and get back to normal too quickly, you'll only end up knocking yourself out and delaying your recovery.

PP's knocking the OP obviously haven't had 'flu and I suspect are of the "all colds are 'flu and all headaches are migraine" brigade

PersonaNonGarter thank you, yes, just wanna slouch about without feeling uncomfortable. As I said previously, am feeling slightly better today so have been able to find the use of my fingers to use a tablet 🙄

Whether or not this is flu, a bad cold, or some other virus or illness, the OP probably knows if she is well enough to get up or not !!!

Some odd replies on here.

(Still think it is ok for your dh's friend to be round though, just not in our room).

Of course 3 days in bed is normal for flu.

Oh I've had flu and there not a cat's chance in hell I'd be eating/drinking/moaning about out of sight drinkers. It takes all your depleted energy to throw up with flu. Mumsnetting is most definitely not happening in the grip of influenza.

When I had all my limbs amputated I only spent 23 seconds in bed

I had the really awful strain of flu at the Millenium. I swear to God half of the neighbours on my mother's street came in a conga around her spare bed where I lay desperately praying for death's sweet grip. I couldn't have cared less they were there, i was too ill to give a damn. Flu is serious. Not saying you don't feel bloomin awful OP, there are some nasty bugs around that really wind you. But you are eating and drinking and moaning, it's a positive sign you are on the mend.

There is a nasty bug around ATM. I got it ten days ago. It involves coughing, sneezing, nosebleeds, aches and whistling in the ears. I've been up and about most of the time though, apart from going back to bed when too tired. I wouldn't call it flu though. Flu requires a darkened room and no food!

Hope you feel better soon OP. I wouldn't want DH's friends coming into my room when I was feeling ill either.

Sorry I think you are being unreasonable, it sounds like your husband is socialising at home so he can still take care of you by bring you food etc. Much better than if he was out all night. I wouldn’t be best pleased with the friend coming up to your bedroom though either. Feel better soon :)

If you have flu you could be posting on mumsnet after four days, you just couldnt be doing anything else! I would be raging to have a man come into my bedroom, what strange lack of boundaries.
Dont get why they need to drink on a Monday unless they work at the weekend.

Nothing wrong with your DP having friends round when you are in bed upstairs but I'd be pissed off with them turning up in my bedroom!

I do think you'd feel better if you had a shower/bath after four days though. A bath (not too hot) can really help you feel a bit more relaxed, less smelly and just generally a bit less horrible.

Oh dear god! It's the flu not a sniffle! And even if not influenza she obviously feels pretty ill - I've been in bed with chest infections for longer than three days. (And who goes to the doctors with something like that - it's probably a virus so what could they do?)

She's been in bed for three days not three weeks!!

I'd have been upset if my DH had had a friend round when two of us were upstairs ill and I'd have been incandescent if he'd brought him into my bedroom.

If he really couldn't cope with a couple of nights watching tv on his own he'd have been better off going out for a couple of hours.

My one and only experience of having flu was that I felt so bloody awful that I wouldn’t have given a flying fart if the entire cast of Les Mis had trooped through my bedroom singing Do you Hear The People Sing at full blast.
Last thing I would be doing would be typing on Mumsnet complaining about what my husband was doing in another room.
Open a window
Shut your bedroom door
I’m not saying you aren’t I’ll but flu, my dear, you do not have

If you had flu you wouldn’t be on a phone/tablet posting on the internet and wouldn’t be able to eat

What crap.

Sounds like there is more to this than your original post. You don't like the smoking outside, that's very understandable. Also the comment, regular visitor to say the least implies more. Not washing for 4 days is odd or filthy. People with life long conditions manage to wash themselves

Flu means horizontal, puking into a bowl by your head, not eating and barely keeping fluids down.
I've had "real" ful 3 times in my (long) life. In bed pretty much solidly for a week each time, then recovery time after that.
At no point was I puking, nor struggling to keep fluids down.

An awful lot of people seem to think they can diagnose a complete stranger on the internet with little concrete evidence.

I have had flu once in a fairly long life and I was ill for over 5 weeks. One week of being in bed, moving around but exhausted/sleeping whenever I could for the next two, and then slowly getting back to normal. I’ve had other viruses that took up to 5 days to get better from.

Yeah flu made me lots of things, but I was never sick.

I don't think some people understand that not everyone vomits when they're ill. I haven't been sick since I was a newborn, yet have had flu a few times, food poisoning and other viruses that some people would vomit with. I just don't vomit.

I had flu over Xmas and was in bed for 5 days. I am never ill, the only things that flatten me are migraines, and I was shocked at how ill I felt.

My dad was ill and barely able to move for over a week, but yeah all pile on the OP and call her a malingerer because you have never had what she has

I’m not saying you aren’t I’ll but flu, my dear, you do not have

With a bit of effort you could be an even bigger patronising arsehole.

Ooh, I do love a thread where people queue up to tell us with absolute certainty the universal rules about what you can and cannot do with the flu.

I’m not saying you aren’t I’ll but flu, my dear, you do not have

How the holy FUCK do you know that?

Yeah trying hard here Pyong
It just rankles a little tbh.
Sorry op for being ‘a patronising arsehole’
I hope you feel better soon.