To ask if you are nowhere near retirement and exhausted already?

[evaperonspoodle]

We had a winter sun holiday over christmas and I was watching the retired couples who lived there playing tennis and looking really fit and healthily tanned and remarked to DH that that would be us in a few years. He brought me back to earth with a jolt remarked that I will probably not retire for another 30, in which case I'll be 70. I am exhausted as it is, my dc are either secondary school or nearly there and I am so much more tired now then when I had 3 dc under 4. I cannot imagine in 30 years time wanting to do anything other than watch TV under a blanket.

Does anyone else feel like this or AIBU?

YANBU. I'm the same age (ballpark figure). I simply cannot believe I'll even bloody make retirement age Knackered already!

I'm 38 with no children and a low stress office job, and I would retire tomorrow if I could afford to! I'm really not cut out for working, but who Is?!

I'm in my 50s and have already mentally left the building.I'm hoping to reduce my hours to a four day week this year and am seeing it as the first step out the door. I just have nothing left to give.

speakout I definitely feel like it's a short term feeling so I'm glad you have confirmed it actually is!!

To be fair we do some lovely things with the DCs and take great trips/holidays but its the everyday stuff that wears you down isn't it. I love the age of the kids at the moment, they are fun and nice to be around but obviously so demanding of our time in a totally different way then when they are little.

Note to everyone, never let your kids play cricket, it takes up hours and hours and hours of your life

KeepCalm 💐💐

@LunaTheCat @DorisDances thank you. I've managed a 3hr meeting today and now in a heap in my jammies on the couch eating a pot noodle

I don't want to retire because that means I will be 72 (Ridiculous retirement age)

You are only young once, treasure it. Work sucks sure... but I'd work forever if I could stay young forever

Work sucks sure... but I'd work forever if I could stay young forever

Oooooh I like this thinking!

That would be the baby boom generation....the generation that had it all. But they'll tell you how tough it was when the interest rates went sky high....Yawn
…..forgetting that they reaped cheap housing, free health care (dental/opticians) free education, amazing pensions etc etc.
Bitter? yes I am!!

I am a baby boomer and don't deny that I have been very fortunate but, like most, I want to help my children.

By free education, I presume you mean free tertiary education, which is true, but only about 8-10% went to university. Having said that, degrees weren't necessary for most jobs. I think it is shocking that so many jobs require a degree these days so that students are obliged to start life with massive debts.

Also, the food was rubbish back in the day, so little choice and if you wanted olive oil you had to buy it at a chemist! And no internet/mobile phones and travel was much more costly (but therefore more exotic and more places 'unspoilt').

But I've digressed. Life does get much easier when the children go off to university and become more independent (even if they leave their pets behind to be cared for!). You will have more time for yourself and for each other and much more energy. So just hang on in there, make provision for the future as much as you can, but don't let that stop you enjoying the present and your lovely family.

Yup
I have partially addressed this by overhauling my
Diet and fitness and alcohol consumption

But full time Wprk , demanding kids , aging parents and a home does not make for a restful life !!!!!

I'm 44 and numb with tiredness, forgetful and ratty.

I'm just existing until the dc's head to Uni and I can sleep and hear myself think again. Only 8 years to go.

It's easy to fall into a vicious circle. My eldest is now at uni and youngest is really not much work, so I do have a lot more time for myself now but... everything seems more tiring. A used to go to meetings and come out of them buzzing with adrenalin that gave me boost of energy. Nowadays, any little boost of adrenalin leaves me shacking all over, with a headache and utterly shattered. I used to get anxious at new tasks but then shine and see my confidence rise. Nowadays, I get anxious that I won't perform well, indeed don't perform as I wish to however much I prepare myself, and then worry that everyone think I'm worthless!

My sleep is abysmal and wake up every morning feeling like I'm recovering from a hangover despite not drinking at all (and eating well, exercising etc...). Really, it feels that the tings that used to fuel me with energy before now just drain me and I find it utterly frustrating and demoralising because deep inside, I still want to be as performing as I used to.

Totally shocked at baby breaks as a phrase ? So no sleep and recovery fro childbirth is a break?

I'm 40 .. two under five. Work 5 or 6 days a week and dh works away a lot.

Exhausted but I lay into private pension so have less than 20 years to go

My son has autism. I'll never retire, only being dead will see me free of it. I'm exhausted beyond belief and only 47.

I definitely found having a few years off when the DCs were born was a break. We had all day free to do whatever but now it is a constant juggling act of school, activities, appointments, work. Being tired from lack of sleep and having a baby is not in the same league IME. Everyone is different though.

Having babies/toddlers and working full time must be mega tough too when they are very young. I didn't go back till DS2 was 3 but found it ok as once we were home at 6/7ish then it was only the bedtime routine to do. Now we can hardly fit it all in.

I was tired when my kids were little and I was a single mum working FT. Yet somehow was t as tired as now. I kept thinking then that each stage of them getting older would see me regaining my energy. It's gone the other way! I think a lot of it because it is cumulative. The other reason is that I used to sleep much better. I now feel like I rarely get a proper deep revitalising sleep despite sleeping more hours. I used to wake up up quiet refreshed even on little sleep, I now wake up feeling more tired than when I went to bed.

17 years to go unless the government move the goalposts again and wondering if I can stand it. I have a spreadsheet charting when the private pensions will start paying and how much, which pretty much says how desperate I am to get there. I had always hoped to downshift and give myself a chance to enjoy life a bit more in my 50's, maybe change to a more enjoyable job, but I think the late baby has pretty much put paid to that.

Plus I have a DP who is positively proud of not saving for retirement and declaims to anyone who will listen that pensions are the greatest lie ever told. Which means that mine will have to keep both of us, but he's immune to irony. He says he'll just keep working until he drops. He seems to assume that he'll drop hard and fast, and won't have a health issue which might stop him working at his demanding physical job. But he's always right (in his own mind, at least) and I'm just a sucker throwing money away by paying into a pension.