To get complete rage when my teens are on their phones while watching tv?

[brownmouse]

This gives me the RAGE. Particularly when we are watching something they want to watch: then they are just on the phones scrolling through pictures of nail polishes!!!

I think what gives me the rage is the lack of concentration on a single thing, which I think ultimately is pretty poor for your mental health.

AIBU and want to turn off "their" programmes and watch Great Canal Journeys instead?

I'm not sure how old your DC are OP. But I think you're lucky they sit in the same room as you and pretend to watch TV. Mine are older teens and rarely join me - they would always have their phones with them. If I got stroppy about it they would just go back to their rooms to do their own thing. I guess its everyone's home and they ought to be able to choose how then spend their down time? I wouldn't like it if anyone nagged me to do what they wanted.

People used to complain about kids watching too much TV instead of doing healthy family activities.

I’m a fidget. I struggle to sit still and concentrate on films. Box set series and tv programmes I’m better with. I have my phone out a lot when watching tv. Why not? My choice. Before phones I would be flicking through a magazine whilst tv was on. Don’t buy them now. Filling in crosswords or puzzle books. Colouring in. Lots of things people have done in the past whilst watching tv. Not an addiction. If it’s there I use it but if it was taken off me I’d find something else to do whilst watching tv.

My kids don’t have phones yet but they do have tablets and hand held games devices. If they both go on those I do switch the tv off. I know my eldest is incapable of multi tasking. She can barely eat if the tv is on. They’re quite happy for me to put something else on tv if they’re using another screen. My youngest can’t just watch TV. She has to have her hands busy so will do jigsaws, draw, mooch about. Eldest watches tv and is totally engrossed and would be the same with the other screen.

I’ve always had the tv on in the background for ‘company’ as lived on my own. When I was a teacher and brought home 30-60 books to mark most nights I’d need the tv on in the background. Some people have music on or the radio. I don’t do marking now but do a lot of lesson prep with the tv on and I’m studying so will have the tv on when writing essays. Back in my undergrad days it would be the CD player as no tv!!

Before phones I would often fall asleep watching a film if I wasn’t busying my hands. I struggle at the cinema and don’t go very often as I can’t sit still and do nothing for a full film. One the drink and snacks are gone I fidget.

I would say put some boundaries in place. If you let them have control of the tv for one or two hours a day, you can’t policehow they watch it. But also make it clear that you want to have an hour (or whatever) of time where you’re in control of what you watch.

I'm in my 60's and I've always done this - watching TV and also reading a book / doing a crossword / eating etc. These days I'm likely to be playing on online game on my iPad or scrolling through my Facebook. I don't have a problem with kids doing it - I'm not convinced that it's bad for their mental health .