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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to have sanitary products on display?

265 replies

Howvery · 29/01/2019 19:26

And by on display I don’t mean on a golden stand under a spotlight but on a shelf in my bathroom.
We have had friends and there DC (dd 8 and ds 6) to stay this weekend.
I have a box of tampons and packet of sanitary towels on a shelf in the bathroom. I went in and noticed they weren’t there, after hunting found them in the cupboard under the sink with the cleaning products, I put them back on the shelf. Just assumed it was DH who has form for throwing things in the nearest cupboard when ‘tidying’. Went back to the loo later that day and noticed again they had been put in the cupboard.
I went back in the lounge and said to DH, can you stop putting my stuff away in the cleaning cupboard. That’s when friend pipes up ‘oh I moved them I don’t think it is appropriate for them to be out especially where the DC can see them’. I was quite perplexed by this, but carried on the rest of the weekend, sanitary products hidden away as to not scar the children.

AIBU to think this is a totally bizarre way of thinking??? Firstly it’s my bathroom, can have things out if I want and find it rude that someone would put them away but secondly to think it is inappropate for children to see them, especially as she has a DD who is 8!
It’s a silly thing but the more I think about it the more flabbergasted I am!!

OP posts:

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stuckinarut2019 · 29/01/2019 22:42

YANBU, that would really annoy me.

pigsDOfly · 29/01/2019 22:52

Older people 50+ can be embarrassed.

So when does it happen, this mass embarrassment of the 50+ population? Come midnight on your 50th birthday do you get a large enveloped from the government containing the obligatory level of embarrassment delivered through your door?

I'm way past 50 but I certainly wouldn't be embarrassed by sanitary towels or condoms, and it's a far time since I needed either. I haven't had periods since just after I turned 50 due to a hysterectomy and as I'm not currently on the dating scene condoms are, sadly, not required so I have neither in my bathroom.

tinyme77 · 29/01/2019 23:01

I must be showing my age. I don't want to have that conversation yet with my boys so prefer them not to see things that would trigger questions. I think that while father Xmas is still around they don't need to know.

LaurieMarlow · 29/01/2019 23:09

Older people 50+ can be embarrassed

I wish people would stop hiding behind this kind of nonsense. See also breastfeeding in public threads. It's disingenuous.

If you have a problem with it personally, say so. Let the 'over 50s' speak for themselves.

Surfingtheweb · 29/01/2019 23:12

We don't have ours out on display, but nor Is the shampoo etc. Or any cleaning products in the kitchen, my view is if it's not an ornament it shouldn't be out for all to see

LaurieMarlow · 29/01/2019 23:12

Loo roll is used by everyone, several times a day. sanpro is used by only one family member for 5 days a month, so doesn't need to be out constantly

What if you've teenage girls in the house?

Nothing 'needs' to be out. You've as much right to make sanpro ready to hand as loo roll.

LaurieMarlow · 29/01/2019 23:13

Do people actually still have ornaments?

Who knew.

KrazyKatlady · 29/01/2019 23:17

I presume my ds (9) has seen sanpro - i don't hide it away but if it fits in a cupboard/cabinet i would likely put it in there. Could well have seen a box on the stairs after unpacking shopping. Hes never mentioned it, i don't even know if he took any notice.
Slightly bemused by the Father Christmas reference....I've never considered whether he would feel awkward about it!!!😂😂

Willow2017 · 29/01/2019 23:17

Must be lovely for all these people with giant bathrooms with lots of storage space for cupboards big enough to put bumper packs of loo rolls, all cleaning stuff plus shampoos, tooth brushes etc etc in them😁😁

pigsDOfly · 29/01/2019 23:20

LaurieMarlow A great many people on MN have very strange ideas about people over a certain age, in this case 50.

They seem to have the idea that we were all born in the 1800s and if we spy a stray ankle we get a nasty touch of the vapours.

I was around in the 60s, when sex was invented.

*I don't seriously believe sex was invented in the 60s, just in case anyone wants to pull me up on that.

castielchace · 29/01/2019 23:20

I can't believe the backward behaviour to sanitary products!!!! My 11yr old DD does mixed rugby & she has a few sanitary towels in her bag just in case. A few months ago she's changed into her kit ,bag in hand heading for the lockers with the others & pulls out her gum Sheild for one of the sanitary packets to fly across the floor!!! Bloody shockhorror to her girlmates😨 her teammate who was also loading his bag into the lockers who's a boy picks it up gives it her back,smiles & says" is this yours. ...daughter's name...looks at her girl mates sniggering & says it's nothing to be embarrassed about!!! Then says to my DD "I've got two older sisters!! Smiles & shoves his bag in the locker next Tomy DD ..her mates shut up giggling & it wasn't mentioned by anyone XX would like to say if your this boys mum/ sister you should be so proud XX what a kind young man XX

fairybeagle · 29/01/2019 23:24

YANBU! What a weirdo and very rude!

Ariela · 29/01/2019 23:31

Goodness how weird your friend is?!

Wonder what she'd think when I hang mine and DD's pads in rainbow order on the line?

recklessruby · 29/01/2019 23:33

I don't need them anymore but dd does and the packet just lives in the bathroom by the loo unnoticed and unremarked upon by anyone. Ds certainly doesn't have a fit of the vapours any time he needs the loo or shock horror his sister openly mentions period pains!
What does your friend do when she's out shopping with dc and needs to buy Sanpro? Cover their eyes? Yanbu and in any case it's your house to put whatever you like in the bathroom

marbley · 29/01/2019 23:41

Next time you visit them leave a single tampon in their bathroom (obviously someone dropped it) on display just as you are about to leave.

It's people like your friend that make it such a taboo subject. I feel for her daughter.

IdleBetty · 29/01/2019 23:51

My cabinet is quite small. Enough room for a box of tampons, razor, condoms (yes, have kept these in the bathroom incase DC ever needed them).
Pads/liners sit on top of the cabinet or on top of cistern as don't fit.

ArcheryAnnie · 29/01/2019 23:52

I’d never have them on display. It’s personal, and I don’t want other people seeing my stuff. I want to keep those items private.

But this applies to everything in your bathroom. The loo seat itself is a piece of furniture whose sole purpose is to support your naked bum as it extrudes waste from inside your body. Doesn't get more personal and private than that, and yet somehow we don't faint at the sight of porcelain.

My religion copes with having open baskets of towels, tampons, etc, in the unisex loos for anyone to use - this was begun because we have a lot of refugee women using the building, and sanpro is so expensive. Nobody thinks it odd. (I've got a beef with unisex loos themselves but it's a tiny space we have to fit loos in.)

Imperfectsusan · 29/01/2019 23:54

We have such things openly visible in our bathroom and my mixed sex teens don't blink an eye.

PRoseLegend · 30/01/2019 00:01

@Ariela
I use cloth pads too, they go on the clothes line. If I was having company I'd clear the clothes line if I had time, but not because there's pads on it, but because I like to tidy up.

RCohle · 30/01/2019 00:13

Moving stuff around in someone else's house is really rude!

I do actually have my sanpro in a cupboard rather than out and thinking about it I do prefer not to have it visible. But that's totally my own issue and something I probably work on - I would never dream of shoving someone else's tampons out of sight.

theworldistoosmall · 30/01/2019 00:13

She would hate my toilet. Tampax, pads, nighttime massive pads and incontinence pants all on display with the toilet roll. Also, have bags and the horror a bin.

I would have burst out laughing and asked her what the hell she was talking about.

WhiteDust · 30/01/2019 06:12

Older people 50+
God yeah... we can't cope seeing or hearing about anything related to bodily functions. Back in the '80s and '90s we used strips of old fabric. Never heard of (or heaven forbid seen) sanitary products before.
As for condoms... (faints)

echt · 30/01/2019 06:23

Older people 50+ can be embarrassed

So can the OP's fucking nosy friend, apparently, so not age-related.

At 64 I can say neither I nor any my friends concealed the sannies. The only reason for putting them out sight was because they actually had drawer to put them in.

Now I'm the Tenapause, other products take their place.

I despair about the POV of some of the younger generation.

JasperKarat · 30/01/2019 06:37

I keep mine in a drawer but only because I don't have a shelf, in our old place they were on a ledge next to the toilet. Some people are funny about what children see, a couple of weeks ago we had friends to visit, I nipped upstairs to feed DS I don't think BF is to be hidden but it was just easier and more comfortable to go up to the nursery. Their the age a half year old came up after about five minutes saying she wanted to see the baby's room, she did knock and ask to come in so I told her it was fine. Friend later said that her DH felt it was best if DD didn't see me BF as it might give her funny ideas about feeding babies! I raised an eyebrow at funny idea, and friend clearly embarrassed said, oh I mean confused. What they don't know is that their DD asked me why I was feeding DS 'with my booby not a bottle' (she has a younger bottle fed sibling). I just said some babies have bottles and some babies have boobies it's all milk and doesn't matter. She was fine with that and was then more interested in whether he has any toys.

Claudia1980 · 30/01/2019 06:46

Your friend is a prude. And it’s also really rude to put other people’s stuff away without asking.

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