To start with: very first world problem disclaimer. Happy for responses that say IABU, but not on the grounds of first-worldliness.
I have a very close friend, whom I consider to be my best friend. She was (the only) bridesmaid at my wedding, we have supported each other through a lot. Relevant to the below is that she doesn’t have any financial difficulties.
I recently had my first DC. We / he have received all sorts of lovely new baby presents from friends, colleagues, wider family, etc. This bff got him a large muslin (a very nice one) that I happen to know cost a tenner. Whilst I’d be delighted with that from another friend, I really think it’s on the mean side for a best friend’s first born.
BFF has form for this. For me and DH’s wedding she said she wanted to get us a dinner at a top restaurant in Tokyo (our honeymoon destination). She had been to this restaurant previously. Originally she said she would book it for us and arrange to pick up the bill. This then became: she would give us some yen in advance and tell us where the restaurant was. Then this became: we would pay and she would reimburse us. At her request, I kept the bill and gave it to her with lots of thanks when we returned. She never reimbursed me or mentioned it again. I felt too awkward to ask.
I don’t know what to feel about this. I really don’t want to be the kind of person that sets too much store by material gifts or monetary value, but I feel partly hurt (like this reflects a lack of value for our friendship) and partly just appalled by what I see as her bad manners. DH says I just need to accept her meanness as a character flaw like any other. I guess he’s right, and I’d never say anything to her, but I can’t help it affecting how I feel about her. AIBU?