Thirteen year old babysitter?

[Raisinbrain]

My two boys are 10 years apart so 13 and 3.
WIBU to leave them alone for a few hours in an evening? Or would you wait another year or three?
We don't have any family or local support so DH and I currently never go out together.

DS1 is a sensible and very cautious child and absolutely adores his little brother.
DS2 is a good sleeper and never ever gets out of bed once he's settled.

My head says it's too young but I used to babysit local kids at that age.

Honestly , no.
3 year olds can be a handful and even a sensible 13 year old could struggle .
If the younger one was a bit older then yes but I personally think 3 is really young

I have this gap between my sister my mum worked early evening so i was babysitting regularly at 15 so i must have started around 14. It really is uo to you tojudge how sensible he is to leave him in charge and would the 3 year old behave.

Sorry, but no. I have a very sensible 13-year-old but wouldn't dream of leaving her alone with a 3-year-old so I could go out. I'd leave it a couple of years.

I really don't think it would be worth the hassle for a night out

No, that's just not fair on the 13 year old.

I have a really, really uber sensible 13 yr old, she's amazing, truly.

I would never even remotely consider leaving her with a 3 yr old for a few hours, no, not even slightly.

We’ve only recently left DD14 with DS5 for an hour here and there. I think 3 is a bit too young really.

I was babysitting for tiny babies at that age! How times have changed

No.
Would he know what to do if 3 yo fell over and split his head open?
Would he be happy cleaning up sick?
Would he know what to do if a fire broke out?
Would he know what to do if hte 3yo started choking?

Yes - all extreme and hopefully rare situations, but all possible. It's not fair to put that responsibility on a 13yo.

I wouldn’t. I would hesitate leaving a 13 year old alone in the evening let alone in charge of a 3 year old.

It does depend on the 3 year old. I know you say he's a great sleeper but if he wakes up crying and voms everywhere how long would it take you to get back?
My 3 year old is a toerag and I don't like being left alone with her at aged 38.

I would if I felt the 13 year old was responsible. I take it your 3 year old would be in bed? I was babysitting my younger siblings from around aged 11 and there were no mobile phones in those days.

So interesting to read everyone's thoughts thank you!

For everyone saying no, what age do you think it would be ok? 14 and 4? 15 and 5? 16 and 6?

I'm still on the fence but leaning toward no. Feel like it wouldn't be fair on DS1, although he says he's fine with it. I'd only consider going out locally at this point of course (15 mins walk away).

If he's fine with it, he's sensible, and you're a short walk away then yes I would.

I dont this is ok. I would leave dd15 with dd8 to nip to the shop for bread/milk with the baby but its not her responsibility to babysit her. Im a single mum and have no help at home.

Can he use a phone and is he able to respond to the 3yr olds needs? Can you get back quickly? I’d personally get the 3 yr old into bed and asleep and then go.

I think I'd look at it this way .... put aside that he is your DS, and imagine asking a friends son to babysit your youngest. What age would you feel comfortable with him doing it? I think my answer to that would be 16. Possibly 15 going on 16, but no younger.

I agree, 15-16

No, I wouldn’t
Dd is 14 and DS is 10. We leave them on their own for a couple of hours during the day but not usually in the evening, although I know some people would be happy to do so.
They are both pretty sensible and we have good neighbours but it’s not necessary to do it so we don’t. Obviously in an emergency we could and it would be fine

My daughter used to babysit for friends when she was 13. Depends on the child and also the little ones they are looking after.
I have a friend who wouldn't leave her young ones in the care of her 20 year old son because he's unreliable. Her eleven year old is more capable.

We leave them on their own for a couple of hours during the day but not usually in the evening

What horrors exist in the evening that don't in the day?

Don't see a problem. I was babysitting other peoples kids for money at 13 onwards.

I used to babysit from 15, for a family with 3 under 6, and several other families with 1 or 2 children, ranging from 2-8.
I was a very mature 15 year old (had to be as mum was out on the piss 7 nights a week until the early hours), so I was level headed, and could manage the children really well. Used to bath them, give them supper, put them to bed and do my homework or watch a movie.

I would not have been sensible enough to babysit a little one in the evenings at 13. I’d be to worried that things wouldn’t go wrong- someone breaking in, a fire, a child being ill etc.

But you know your child!

No it’s selfish book a babysitter. At 15/16 yes but not 13.