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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to get annoyed about people parking in parent/baby spaces

184 replies

Mummyto2munchkins · 25/01/2019 17:11

So went shopping today. A woman parked her car in a parent and baby space but left both kids and her mum in the car with the car running..
I shook my head as it annoyed me.

She stopped the car and opened the back door showing her kids saying "if you wanna get lairy my kids are in the car"

We explained that the parking spaces are for parents with kids in the car to get the kids out.. She then said that both kids were in the car. We said also with your mum in the car too.

She then said "he didn't want to go in, what do you want me to do drag them out" we responded with "no just park in a Normal space"

AIBU to think she's out of order, and the spaces are for kids getting out of the car as you're needing extra space to get them in/out? Or am I completely missing something here?

OP posts:
StepAwayFromGoogle · 25/01/2019 20:45

YANBU, OP.

But apparently on mumsnet the people that park in them all have hidden disabilities. Hidden disabilities. All of them. You can't move for the people with hidden disabilities using P&C spaces.

EXCEPT we all know that 99% of the people that park in P&C spaces are just lazy, cheeky f*ckers. But don't say it on here.

It's not snowflakey or entitled or CFery to just need a bit more space to get a car seat out. Or to have spaces near to the entrance or walkways so that your young children (you know, the ones likely to dart) don't get flattened by a car. But on MN it is all those things. Because, you know, let's not do anything to make parents' lives a bit easier.

Original poster
Mummyto2munchkins · 25/01/2019 20:51

Halo just gonna sit here with some popcorn awaiting WW3.. I wish I never posted my frustration of a rude woman blocking me in to have ago for something she "shouldn't" have been doing... Pure laziness..

Disabled in a space - fine
Heavy pregnant - fine

Pure lazy and think the world revolves around then - I think they all need their own spaces in a car park! With gold edges and a red carpet for when they get out the car!

OP posts:
ILoveMaxiBondi · 25/01/2019 20:52

Pure lazy and think the world revolves around then - I think they all need their own spaces in a car park! With gold edges and a red carpet for when they get out the car!

😂 oh the irony!

SlowOx · 25/01/2019 20:52

@SleepingStandingUp God what an embarrassing post. Do you have any hobbies outside of posting on the internet? I bet you felt really pleased with yourself after posting that.

No the parent and child spaces shouldn't be as far as possible across the car park from the supermarket for the "snowflake" parents and children, because it's less safe taking babies, toddlers and small children across the whole car park. Can you imagine a parent with a small child holding each hand parking in them then, if they had to drag across the whole car park dodging cars. Obviously they wouldn't.

I managed for years before having children never feeling the urge to park in parent and child parking. Now we have a baby, we park there so we can get him in his pram etc alongside.

We are always annoyed when clearly childless people park in them, and as pp said it's always in their big shiny range rovers. It just means you're a self important dick. Can't say I'd get het up about someone parking in them with kids in the back of the car though

Roundtoedshoes · 25/01/2019 21:08

Having a baby recently has really made me appreciate these spaces. I couldn’t get in one at the supermarket the other day, so I parked in a normal space. I tried (and failed) to get my babies car seat out - the space was just too tight (I do not have a 4x4 or particularly large car and like to think I’m a pretty good driver). I was opposite the row of P&C spaces. I was not in a rush, so I waited (baby was sleeping). A woman came back to her car (with no children and 1 bag of shopping, no trolley) and reversed her Micra sized car out (i.e. it wasn’t a case of having a large car she couldn’t manoeuvre/was afraid of someone dinging it). I just drove into the space as she left. Anyone that parks in the spaces is arrogant and ignorant, so it’s not worth arguing with them. I imagine they’d either ignore you or respond aggressively (and possibly churn out the children are a lifestyle choice line). The ones in our local Tesco are not nearest to the door (the disabled bays are, quite rightly). This is fine with me (although with only one child who isn’t mobile I might yet appreciate ones that are closer to the shop as they get older and are a potential flight risk!)

That was just one example - I’ve seen them used by people without kids a lot now that I am looking for these spaces.

As for disabled people using them, of course they should if there are no blue badge spaces available. However, where I live, there are always more empty disabled bays then the P and C ones (and a lot more of them, which is right).

We also have a provision in our main town centre car park for brown badge holders (over 70’s) - I’m not sure if these are just a local thing though.

I’m always confused reading these almost daily threads about these spaces why MN is so anti them. They are a nice to have, and yes we could manage without, but there is no need - shops don’t put them in for our benefit - they want families to come into their shops and spend more.

And to the shop online people - I happily would, I just don’t tend to do big shops, rather little and often. I also do walk/use the bus/train sometimes (I hope to do so more when spring arrives). I also often leave the baby with DH at the weekends and pop to the shops alone as I am sure the baby doesn’t care much for it at all. Have I covered all bases?!

anniehm · 25/01/2019 21:09

P&C spaces are courtesy spaces, I wouldn't normally use them as my kids are grown but sometimes I take an elderly lady to the supermarket who is too proud to get a blue badge so yes, I use it as I need to help her in and out, I've also parked in the space at Aldi as they don't have many spaces at all, staff (if in car park) tell you to use the p&c and even disabled spaces once the others are taken.

cinemalover · 25/01/2019 21:11

YANBU in this situation I think OP! Why park there if you're not getting your kids out?🧐🧐

Some people truly are thick!
(And I say this as a nearly 20year old with no children!)

Thisnamechanger · 25/01/2019 21:13

OP, these "..." don't mean what you think they mean.

cinemalover · 25/01/2019 21:13

@PlainSpeakingStraightTalking shouldn't need to point you towards common sense!

Do you seriously think this woman using the space for no reason was right?

It's like saying 'oh I do have kids, but they're at school and not actually getting out the car but I can still park here because I have kids'.

tiredscaredmama · 25/01/2019 21:15

Piglet - just to be clear if you reversed into a space you would still walk your children to the back of the car away from the cars on the road and towards the path....

I'm heavily pregnant with two babies on board and two other children - this thread basically says I should either stay home or take my chances bump and children as clearly I am feckless in daring to have them in the first place.

It's clear that no matter what is said the trolls on here will find a contrary view - my comment was in response to the numerous people saying they are usually found near the shop as if this in itself justifies the need for others to abuse the designation. If not near the shop they tend to run adjacent to a central path. THIS IS FOR SAFETY.

The lack of any logic or common sense in this thread is appalling. Are the people who disagree with the principle of P&C spaces actually mothers? If so can you not remember the anxiety of taking small children around a busy car park and trying to squeeze yourself in to leverage them out??

Keyboard warriors.....

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 25/01/2019 21:20

Keyboard warriors

It was you who has had a post deleted. 🤦🏼‍♀️

ILoveMaxiBondi · 25/01/2019 21:21

I'm heavily pregnant with two babies on board and two other children - this thread basically says I should either stay home

So do you literally only ever park in supermarket car parks? Don’t you ever park in other places that don’t have P&C spaces?

Stinkytoe · 25/01/2019 21:24

Most places around where I live have P&C. It’s not a special supermarket thing

tiredscaredmama · 25/01/2019 21:24

Are you kidding me. I can't even be bothered with your goading....oh no I said a bad word, seriously!?! That justifies your trolling?

This thread is beyond words and your position on the issue is absurd. Seriously - you want to attack mothers who dare to suggest that the spaces allocated for them to use (legally binding or not) should not be used by people who do not need to use them. I despair.

MarieIVanArkleStinks · 25/01/2019 21:24

I was once bawled out for pulling into a parent and child space when another driver had wanted it, and thought they had a right to it because, as she shrieked at me, 'I had my indicator on!' (which I couldn't see because it was obscured behind the car that was pulling out). Took the spot, completely oblivious to her presence until she made herself known through her undignified yelling. I ignored her, busying myself with unloading DS and strapping him into the shopping-trolley seat. Glanced across at her getting out of her own car on the other side of the car park. Not a child in sight.

I just smiled to myself and got on with my day. The world's full of them :)

cleanerneeded · 25/01/2019 21:27

I don't think my view will be popular on here but I don't think it'd be fair to move them to the far side of the car park.

As parents we're only expressing our gratitude to the supermarkets for providing a tiny something to make our lives a bit easier. What's wrong with that?

And no, they shouldn't be put at the far said of the supermarket because then my baby has to get soaked in the rain rather than just me. And before someone says it, my child isn't a snowflake, she's a human Wink

MN is such a funny place sometimes Grin so many strong opinions and often compassionate people but my god, if you agree with P&C spaces then by MN rules you must not understand that there are disabled people in the world. Truly bizarreConfused

tiredscaredmama · 25/01/2019 21:27

Most out of town shopping centres and city centre car parks have P&C parking - I very rarely go anywhere where I would have to park without these spaces and I'm happy to sit and wait or go and return if the spaces aren't free. I have SPD & I'm on crutches plus I have two other children. It's not worth the hassle of trying to get out of a standard space. Worse still (and you'll all enjoy this) I also have a Land Rover. May as well give you a bit more bait....Confused

Unicornfoodissparkle · 25/01/2019 21:30

So do you literally only ever park in supermarket car parks? Don’t you ever park in other places that don’t have P&C spaces?

I certainly don’t only park in places with p and c. It’s not possible sometimes you have to go places that don’t provide them.
But the supermarket shop is the most regular car park where I have dc in tow, usually weekly sometimes more, and they provide them.
Our local retail outlet also has them and local town and city centre has them.
So they are a fairly common phenomenon, would you believe.

ILoveMaxiBondi · 25/01/2019 21:31

Wow so you really don’t ever park in a normal space!

ILoveMaxiBondi · 25/01/2019 21:33

Where I am the only car parks that have them are ASDA and Lidl. None of the other car parks in my town have them. Without a blue badge you would just have to use a normal space or walk a long way.

tiredscaredmama · 25/01/2019 21:33

Yup! It's hard work otherwise. Hence why this thread has goaded me perhaps more than most. I depend on these spaces a lot at the moment!

tiredscaredmama · 25/01/2019 21:35

Where I live there are 3 large or of town shopping centres - one a sort of outlet place, the other two shopping parks with anchor supermarkets but lots of other shops. They all have a good number of P&C spaces.

tiredscaredmama · 25/01/2019 21:36

*out not or

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 25/01/2019 21:38

and your position on the issue is absurd.

Yeah right For saying some think they don't need to be at the front of the store and they technically aren't a legal requirent. Hmm

I an severly disabled and as recently as yesterday had a member of the public try to tell me that I shouldn't park somewhere perfectly legally by a member of public who can't keep their nose out of other peoples business.

So try dealing with that sort of crap regularly then get back to me.

tiredscaredmama · 25/01/2019 21:43

Piglet - nobody has said disabled people shouldn't park in them! Not one single person. This isn't about disabled people vs mothers. It's about people who have no need to use these spaces using them which actually deprives both parents and the disabled from using them. You are being unreasonable and taking offence for no reason.

What is being said here and clearly is that people who have no need to use them should not use them!!! You are saying mothers have no need to use them. I strongly disagree as on a day to day basis I am actually fairly dependent on them.

I am on crutches at the moment as I'm expecting twins and have severe SPD - I have 2 other children with me all the time. I can just about manage getting to a couple of shops if I can park in one of these spaces. As I said if they are full I wait or leave and return.