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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To say to being a guarantor?

86 replies

newmun · 23/01/2019 15:55

I have a new mum friend known about two months

Shes asked me to become a guarantor on a loan ?

I said no but feel bad. Aibu?

OP posts:
Awwlookatmybabyspider · 23/01/2019 16:06

I feel sorry for her, as She obviously has no one else if she's asking mate she's known 5 minutes. However I also don't blame you for saying "No".
I would myself in your situation.
Who's to guarantee that she wouldn't just disappear on an Aeroplane someone with the money. You don't know that.

Elfinablender · 23/01/2019 16:08

I feel sorry for her, as She obviously has no one else if she's asking mate she's known 5 minutes

Maybe, or all her friends and family know her well enough to keep their finances and hers separate.

gamerwidow · 23/01/2019 16:09

I said no to my sister so yiureentirrly reasonable to say no to someone you’ve only known five minutes.
It’s incredibly risky being a guarantor my mum and my DPs parents are probably the only people I’d trust to act on this capacity for them

AWishForWingsThatWork · 23/01/2019 16:09

Hell no!

You would be responsible for every pence she owes under the contract/loan if she decides not to pay it/can't pay it!

BarbaraRoyale · 23/01/2019 16:09

I wouldn't and I'd not feel guilty for saying no

ISdads · 23/01/2019 16:10

Yabu to feel guilty. Why do you feel guilty??????????

YetAnotherUser · 23/01/2019 16:10

My stock answer for this sort of thing is "I'm very flattered you asked, but unfortunately I'm not in a position to be a guarantor to anyone."

Topseyt · 23/01/2019 16:10

Absolutely right for you to say no.

There is no advantage to you in being a guarantor, only potential cost and hassle if she should default on her repayments.

The only time we have ever been guarantors was for our student DD1 while she was still at uni. She needed to rent a house with friends as her time in hall came to an end. We had no choice really, or she would have been on the streets. I wouldn't do it for anyone else though.

KlutzyDraconequus · 23/01/2019 16:10

I wouldn't do it for a family.memeber, let alone some chuckle fuck I'd just met.

Hereward1332 · 23/01/2019 16:12

There's a reason she is asking someone who doesn't know her or her financial habits well

Whatsnewpussyhat · 23/01/2019 16:12

Of course you should do that for your new BFF. (Who will then fuck off and leave you responsible for the debt)

Original poster
newmun · 23/01/2019 16:13

Thank guys. Definitely feel better about saying no!

I just had memories of that show cant oay well take it away.

OP posts:
WrongKindOfFace · 23/01/2019 16:15

Say no.

KatharinaRosalie · 23/01/2019 16:15

Why on earth do you feel bad? It's like asking you to give her money, which she may or may not pay back.

WrongKindOfFace · 23/01/2019 16:16

Argh, failure to read. No, you shouldn’t feel guilty for saying no.

Pinkbells · 23/01/2019 16:16

No way would I do that for anyone but family.

PineapplePen07 · 23/01/2019 16:17

What a CF!

One million per cent no 👎

TheQueef · 23/01/2019 16:17

If you were guarantor it'd be you on can't pay.

cstaff · 23/01/2019 16:19

I wouldn't even do it for my own family. No way should you do it for a NEW friend!!

Fluffycloudland77 · 23/01/2019 16:20

I wouldn’t do it either.

PlumpSyrianHamster · 23/01/2019 16:22

I just had memories of that show cant oay well take it away.

GOOD! I'm glad you learned from that. But why the fuck do you feel bad or guilty? WTF? The only person who'd ask someone she knows five minutes to be a guarantor on a loan is an utter chancer.

No way would I do that for anyone but family.

And even then! DH's brother is a compulsive gambler. Even their parents, before they died, had to say no to him. He is still forever trying it on with DH and their two sisters but we won't so much as loan him our car (yes, he asked for that, haaahaaa) because he is completely unreliable.

Blooger · 23/01/2019 16:23

Like previous posters I wouldn't do this even for my best friend. You don't know what will happen in the future and all of a sudden you may be liable for someone else's life and bad choices. No way.

BlackAmericanoNoSugar · 23/01/2019 16:25

It seems a very odd thing to ask of someone that you haven't known very long. If it was me I would take this as a sign to progress this friendship very slowly and cautiously.

Plabom · 23/01/2019 16:25

Like everyone else is saying - no. No with sprinkles on top.

helpmeoutout · 23/01/2019 16:25

definitely not!