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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be shocked at boss telling me off for being late back

469 replies

onlyafewdaystogo · 23/01/2019 11:10

I am retiring from work next Wed, after many years working for this company. Last year our dept got a new Manager who's a bit of a stickler.

Anyhow, due to upcoming retirement several groups of colleagues have been taking me out for lunch in the last few days. Yesterday I went to an Italian restaurant with some people from another Dept that I have a lot of dealings with.

We had a lovely relaxing lunch and I got back to work at 3 o'clock instead of 2.30. My boss knew this group were taking me out. He called me into his office about an hour later and told me off for being late back from lunch and said it's the second time it's happened in recent days and I'd have to watch my timekeeping.

AIBU to be Shock. It's always been the norm when someone is retiring that they spend the last week or so winding down and not really being bound by the normal time bands etc.

My colleagues were really surprised and annoyed when they heard.

OP posts:
BottleOfJameson · 24/01/2019 18:50

Tell him you'll aim to improve, apologise profusely and ask for a review in a months time.

This!

TheEmmaDilemma · 24/01/2019 18:52

WTF? If haven't yet fully read the thread but if you were on my team I'd have told you to take an exta bloody hour.

What is wrong with Managers?

Yabbers · 24/01/2019 18:52

If another manager has spoken to the ops manager about it then it becomes an issue for them.

So he says “ok, I’ll talk to her” and has a lovely chat about retirement. Just because you’re unreasonably kicked, doesn’t mean you pass it on.

traceyjacks1 · 24/01/2019 18:52

Isth must be a barrel of laughs to be around. Tomorrow is your last day have an even longer lunch and enjoy your retirement.

FuckingYuleLog · 24/01/2019 19:10

Is it unreasonable for other departments to want their staff who DO have work to do not be be repeatedly swanning off to take part in the ops week long festival of retirement? I don’t think it is.
Clearly everyone on here could do the ops managers job much better than them so pats on the back all round there. But there is more than one management style and being best friends with all of your staff isn’t necessarily the only or best way in all workplaces.

myrtleWilson · 24/01/2019 19:16

But you're making up scenarios here yule

CasanovaFrankenstein · 24/01/2019 19:18

Have a lovely retirement. If precedent is set that people wind down over the last couple of weeks, he can’t make a fuss.

TurdBox · 24/01/2019 19:19

What am I making up? At the point of posting the thread the op had returned late from 2 extended lunches. Unless she was left sat alone the others attending also returned late. The op is winding down and doesn’t have work to do but other staff do. Taking a load of staff members out of office for a week of extended lunches is taking the piss a little.

TheEmmaDilemma · 24/01/2019 19:19

@FuckingYuleLog

It's not about being 'fwiends'.

It's about having some respect for a long serving, respect employee and those who have worked with her over the years closely to probably resolve and work on issues together. That collaboration between teams and employees is why businesses succeed. Proven.

So allowing twice in a week a few people an extra hour out of their working day will ensure they appreciate you as a Manager, their Employeer and feel that they are respected and appreciated.

But no, it's just 'fweinds' eh?

TurdBox · 24/01/2019 19:21

I’m sure it would be great for morale to allow all staff to take extended lunches, turn up late and leave early all the time. Not going to happen though is it. A line has to be drawn somewhere. And clearly the manager felt 2 extended lunches was enough.

myrtleWilson · 24/01/2019 19:24

There was no complaint after the first lunch, the manager intervened after the second. But we know that the second lunch did not involve any of his staff, the staff on the second lunch were accompanied by their own manager - ergo we assume second lunch manager was fine with it all. So why then does OP manager intervene? he's not there to manage the second managers team, no-one else in his team was late, the OP has no work to do other than filing and there was no impact on others...

myrtleWilson · 24/01/2019 19:24

oh and name change fail yule/turdbox

worrierandwine · 24/01/2019 19:48

I think your manager is from the same place as my manager. We regularly work into dinner and after work but can’t claim any overtime before 15 mins has passed. We were told a while ago that if we’re done we can leave 5-10 mins early. Yesterday we left 5 mins earlier and apparently she’s “going to have a word with us”. I don’t really have enough eye rolls for this woman Hmm

Ellyess · 24/01/2019 20:23

Queenofselfdoubt. Excellent words!! Well said!

onlyafewdaystogo Just do what Queenofselfdoubt says and then have a Happy Retirement! Looks like you are leaving at the right time with this little anal twerp arriving on the scene!

percypeppers · 24/01/2019 20:35

@echt, don't make this about me. Your opinion is very much in the minority on this thread. Just saying.....

expat101 · 24/01/2019 20:42

If you (or one of the people you were lunching with) were leaving someone else in the lurch then yes I would be disappointed but probably not surprised either. I would have had stern words with the colleagues rather than you but then I used to get brassed off when the smokers in my workplace would be outside continually having their puff while I was inside handling the phones and everyone's work load. Ultimately you could have just called in sick for the rest of the afternoon and gone home!

bubblegumunicorn · 24/01/2019 20:51

Just think on Monday (or whichever day is your first of retirement) he has to get up and go out in the freezing cold to work and you can lie in an enjoy your new freedom! Who’s the real winner Grin congratulations on your retirement enjoy it 😊 Flowers

Willow2017 · 24/01/2019 20:56

Taking a load of staff members out of office for a week of extended lunches is taking the piss a little.

Ffs rtt.
Op was taken out to lunch by another manager and his team

Nothing to do with op dragging staff in her area out to skive off work.

Turdbox
Its a tradition at ops work for people retiring manager is well aware of it. It wasnt his team the 2nd time.
Op has no work to do
None of the other staff would expect to do this regularly they arent retiring, give people some damm credit.

Expat funny that he spoke to op when it wasnt any of his staff that were out with her? The other manager wasnt concerned that he and his staff missed a whole half hour in a week. (They probably are owed more than that any way)

TheGirlWithAllTheFeathers · 24/01/2019 21:03

He's being a pedant. Probably sad he wasn't invited. Just keep your lunches within time constraints until you go, then don't look back.

manicmij · 24/01/2019 21:19

Lunch is an easy option to celebrate retirement for colleagues. If causing an issue why not go for a meal straight after work. Just out of curiosity did the manager of the folk in the other dept you were out with tell them off for being late back?

Polarbearflavour · 24/01/2019 21:25

“UK workers gave their employers £31.2 billion of free labour last year by doing unpaid overtime, according to new analysis of official statistics published today by the TUC.”

I’m sure the OP has worked unpaid overtime over the years saving her company some money!

Lmcd18 · 24/01/2019 21:29

I wouldn't let him spoil your last week but at the same time you for the moment still getting paid to do a job an I do think that being 30 minutes late back is taking the mick a bit, enjoy your retirement

Polarbearflavour · 24/01/2019 21:31

Yet it’s fine for employers to expect workers to do unpaid overtime. It’s such a one way straight in the UK!

ChocolateWombat · 24/01/2019 21:33

Well a managers job is to make sensible judgements about Managing their team, and it just seems that this manager didnt really manage very well. Yes there's a time (most of the time) to ensure workers work their hours, but a good manager can also judge when it's good to be a bit flexible and buy some goodwill or when a bit of flexibility just makes sense. They can judge when it's productive to tell someone off and when it's not worth it.

It was petty, but it's him you should feel a bit sorry for, in terms of he couldn't make that judgement. Don't give it much thought, don't moan to the office and be petty yourself. Just realise this is nothing in the wider scheme of things. A good response would have been to just smile and nod a lot and say something like 'I'm so excited to be retiring' and smile a lot more.

On your last day, go and say goodbye and thanks. And do it genuinely. It's good to leave places and all people positively and without bitterness, and this is such a minor little thing it's not worth much thought and not worth interrupting your enjoyment of the last days and celebrations. Enjoy them and forget about this.

Polarbearflavour · 24/01/2019 21:34

Street not straight. Blush

As I’ve said before, I’m not the most motivated person when it comes to jobs and I’ve had loads of jobs where I’ve sat on the Internet all day or worked on my novel. But nobody has ever raised it with me as I’m sitting at my desk - even though I’m doing nothing! That’s been because they have been non-jobs, not because I just ignore tasks.