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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My friend says I'm selfish ...aibu?

94 replies

hallierr · 22/01/2019 22:49

So my friend is getting her hair done tomorrow and we've agreed to go out afterwards.
I agreed to go to the hairdressers with her and wait but I've just remembered I need to go to the doctors.
I live near the salon (10 min walk ) and she said she would drive to mine and leave her car and walk to the salon as she's scared driving into town.
She's asked me will I walk her into town and walk back up and meet her when she's done.
I said would it not be easier to just drive into town.
She's refused and expects me to walk her there and back.
Aibu to not?
I even suggested il get her a Uber on my account and pay.
Just tomorrow is so busy.

OP posts:
PurpleDaisies · 22/01/2019 23:00

Has something happened? I had trouble after I got mugged

Wearywithteens · 22/01/2019 23:02

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn at the poster's request.

Original poster
hallierr · 22/01/2019 23:03

Its literally a straight road.
You walk in a line for 10 mins and you reach the city centre.
She has a iPhone too.

OP posts:
Original poster
hallierr · 22/01/2019 23:04

The hairdresser is in the city centre and they had a offer on so she booked.

OP posts:
AlexaAmbidextra · 22/01/2019 23:05

Well unless the hairdresser is in downtown Beirut she’s being fucking ridiculous.

Coppermine · 22/01/2019 23:05

Nope no anxiety but hates being on her own in places not familiar to her.

This sounds like anxiety to me!

Aquamarine1029 · 22/01/2019 23:06

Your friend is employing emotional terrorism in order to deal with her anxieties. Ignore her. She's a grown woman and it's time she acts like it. You're not her handler, fgs.

Howlovely · 22/01/2019 23:07

She sounds rather pathetic to be honest. I get a bit nervous driving and navigating cities and towns I'm not familiar with so I either avoid them or get on with it because it's my problem. I wouldn't put anybody else out or get in a huff because my friend won't hold my hand all the way. Could you somehow make a joke of it or show her how ridiculous she is being in a light hearted way?

ralphfromlordoftheflies · 22/01/2019 23:09

I have no time for this malarkey

JaniceBattersby · 22/01/2019 23:09

I honestly look at some threads and I wonder how this country won two world wars.

Christ alive.

I’m pretty sure a grown woman can walk in a straight line, sit in a chair then walk back along the same line.

Ljlsmum · 22/01/2019 23:11

Even if she does have anxiety it’s just a bit bloody ridiculous to expect others to go out of there way this much.

PlumpSyrianHamster · 22/01/2019 23:14

What? Hell no! You need to see a doctor. She gets there on her own.

Missingstreetlife · 22/01/2019 23:14

Except you said you would go and now you won't. So she feels let down. Can you take her one way, so she only makes one journey on her own? Or a cab as you said is a good idea. Waiting 2 hours is a bit ott. She'll probably get over it.

tillytrotter1 · 22/01/2019 23:16

Does she suffer with anxiety?

I was waiting for that to be trotted out! Sounds like she's simply selfish and demanding, she can't be out of control in a situation.

Onynx · 22/01/2019 23:17

@JaniceBattersby exactly!! Mumsnet should develop a 'Like' button for posts!

GroggyLegs · 22/01/2019 23:18

'You'll be fine. See you at 2pm'

Don't enable her!

Purplecatshopaholic · 22/01/2019 23:20

Dear Fucking God, talk about First World Problems!

wobytide · 22/01/2019 23:21

Not sure if my sympathy is for the friend or the one who had to ask the internet to validate her decision. Or those who have felt they had to validate the decision. Worrying times

Parthenope · 22/01/2019 23:27

Hang on, forget the driving/walking thing for a second. You agreed to go and sit with this 33 year old woman in a hairdresser’s for two hours while she got her hair done, because she’s not comfortable being there by herself?

It blew my mind on here that some posters found walking into a bar or going to the cinema by themselves nerve wracking, but seriously? She can’t go to the hairdresser’s alone?

gamerchick · 22/01/2019 23:30

It's not the drive that's bothering her, it's the parking.

It's a bit late now for a dry run but she needs to step out of her comfort zone at some point. Even if it means finding somewhere to park that involves a walk after.

Tell her no. She can walk back to yours afterwards.

echt · 22/01/2019 23:38

Not sure if my sympathy is for the friend or the one who had to ask the internet to validate her decision. Or those who have felt they had to validate the decision. Worrying times

This is part of what AIBU does, doesn't it?

when it's not used by lazy feckers who could get an answer by googling

supersop60 · 22/01/2019 23:42

No. She's an adult.
Dear God what would she do if something really bad happened?
I had a parent of one of my students refuse to drive to my house once, because she "got nervous driving to new places". Jeez.

Finfintytint · 22/01/2019 23:42

It's so fucking depressing that she needs parenting at 33.

HAMGina · 22/01/2019 23:46

How would it sound if a partner behaved in this way?

Controlling?

Stop enabling her!

NoSquirrels · 22/01/2019 23:59

Bizarre.

I get the not wanting to drive into town thing - finding parking etc. So she came up with a reasonable solution there, just park at yours and walk.

But why oh why did you agree to sit in the hair appointment for 2 hours??? Why did she book somewhere she's never been before if she's so nervous about it?

A 10 minute walk down a straight road is no big deal. She'll live. Just say no!

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