Anyone else get sick from fear of going to work?

[Workfear]

Every Sunday now I'm up late feeling nauceous because I have to go to work for another week. The work itself isn't a problem, it's my boss and the team to an extent.

It's just issues all the time, and petty ones at that. Complaints, nothing is good enough. I'm expected to work 4 times as hard as others, and still told to hurry up basically, yet if others screw up its like 'oh it's fine, nothing we can do anyway'. And the others screw up all the time, I honestly very rarely make a mistake.

There's always comments about my work, just snide little things that are annoying, it's nothing they can even reprimand me on. If anything, I could tell them to go do one and make my life easier, but I don't to help the team. Last year was very stressful and I almost went to the GP and asked to be put on sick leave.

I am looking for other work too, but that can't instantly happen of course so stuck for now. Just sick of feeling sick every week from anxiety just because my boss is an asshole.

Anyone else get this every week? We can help each other maybe, dunno how other than rant haha.

I'm really sorry you're feeling this way and I do understand hie upsetting it must be. However, (and I mean this really kindly) I do think maybe your perception of the situation could be a bit off. You say, " I do the work of 4 people", "they'll be screwed without me"... I've heard these sort of things from people I've managed in the past and it's never really the case. Often people who say they're much busier than anyone else because they work late, actually struggle to manage their time well or prioritise there workload. And they really won't be screwed without you. Everyone's replaceable.

Having said that, I think looking for another job's the right thing to do as you're obviously but happy. But it may just be worth considering things differently. I hope it works out for you.

Yes I had this every Sunday when I had a quite senior corporate job, its horrendous, I used to treat myself Sunday and Wednesday nights to a Nightol sleeping tablet, they were the only two nights I slept. It's not life just an existence.

Could you perhaps go to agencies and apply for something short term and a bit mindless whilst you're looking?

I was like this when I worked in the Civil Service, I never slept on a Sunday night, all day on a Sunday I was watching the clock counting down to bed time. I had a manager that was a first class bitch, if anyone was going to get a shitty job, it was me, I couldn't blink without getting dragged in for a telling off. We used to have work checks & every Monday morning would get the scores from the week before. If you got below a certain score your manager was supposed to allocate training time, but my manager used to extend the torture by going through each piece of work & telling the member of staff how bad they were. One week I got pulled for missing a full stop off a letter that had taken me nearly 4 hours to do as it had lots of technical stuff & calculations in it, instead of telling me off in private, she told me off in front of the whole office & then tore the letter up & told me I would never be any good at my job. I got to the stage that I couldn't concentrate on my work for fear of making a mistake, I was constantly checking & rechecking everything I did, my work rate went down, I wasn't sleeping at all & I had just found out I was pregnant with DS. I tried to keep my head down despite suffering from morning sickness & ended up being even more sick because of the stress, I had to be signed off sick for a couple of weeks. When I returned I was given the third degree about my absence but tried to keep my mind on the fact that I was going on maternity leave at Christmas & would be off for at least 9 months. I was 15 weeks pregnant at August bank holiday, my then husband had some extra days off due to his shift pattern & I had requested some annual leave at the same time, my request was refused even though there was adequate staff cover at the time I wanted off, I went back to work on the day after the bank holiday, I had been having niggling pains in my stomach & back, I went to the toilet & discovered I was bleeding, I rang my husband who broke all the speed limits to get down to take me to the hospital to be checked over, they scanned me & prescribed rest for a couple of weeks & gave me a sick note with threatened miscarriage as the cause. When I returned to work I had to have a return to work meeting with my manager who implied that it was very convenient that I had become ill when my husband was off work & if I thought that the job was too much for me I was free to resign. Again I kept my head down & worked as hard as I could, by the beginning of December I was dead on my feet, everyone said I looked terrible, when I went to see the midwife she instantly referred me to see the doctor who signed me off until my maternity leave started at Christmas. When I was ready to return to work, I requested a transfer to a new management group, I never had to work for that manager again & thankfully she retired a year after I returned. I never allowed myself to be put under that amount of stress again & eventually went off long term sick & applied for ill health retirement. What that woman did to me was awful, I never recovered from the torture she put me through & now even 15 years later it still affects me.

God some of you have had awful bosses. It's a wonder how some of them actually get hired or promoted for that role. I question that every day where I work.

VioletCharlotte

I know, you aren't the first person to question that I do the work of 4 people. I can't describe my job in detail obviously, but I do. And I don't work late or manage my work badly, trust me, the only reason I get any of it done is because I'm forced to do at least two of them that are both highly demanding at the same time. Other people have said to me they couldn't do what I do and would refuse to do it. I've tried telling my boss that it's impossible, but they never care because of lack of resources, so I just have to put up with it. They are now trying to reduce the fte required for one of the jobs even though I told him realistically it should be an entire month of work if done properly, but because they force me to rush it I have to just force myself to get it done in under a week. Told them it stresses me out, gives me migraines etc. No care in the world about it. Just get on with it. They go by the fact the client has never complained as I must be doing fine.

The poster above gives good advice - list out your tasks, and IN WRITING (follow up in an email after a face to face is best) draw up what can be done in the time you have. This also covers you to some degree because you’ve warned them some work may not be done.

Also, looking at this from the other side, I always tell my direct reports that they need to tell me this is happening. I don’t see it unless they tell me. And if I have a list of tasks and a rough time for them I can then escalate up to get more resource (which is like pulling teeth but I try.)

‘I’m overwhelmed’ I can’t help as much as ‘I have to run these reports, analyse these figures and blah blah, that’s twelve hours work and I’m here for eight.’ That lets me justify asking upper management for six more hours equivalent.

This job is toxic OP, you need to really prioritise leaving and your own mental health.
My job was like this, I had a breakdown eventually and have not been well for 4 years now. Don't be me.

Nat6999. That's terrible. .

I reached the point where I knew that if I'd gone into my boss's office (he used to call me to go in every 5 bloody mins) and found him having a heart attack on the the floor, I'd have quietly stepped over him and left the room. He was the most abusive arsehole, but clever enough to only be vile when there were no witnesses around. Its 2 years since I took early retirement and I still shake, sweat and feel sick if I have to in that building.

I'm in the same boat except mine is on a Monday night as I don't work Mondays I do Tue, Wed, Thurs, Fri.
In my workplace they change the goals/rules weekly, even daily sometimes. So on I Tue I go in and they say oh we aren't doing it like this anymore we do it like that etc.
Then the next Tue it's back to the original way. I have someone I have to answer to that doesn't even have the same qualification as me. It's laughable really. She only works in the mornings then leaves a huge list of stuff to be done that afternoon for me and the other lady. Fortunately I get on with the other lady ok otherwise I'd have left by now.

Bowlofbabelfish

Done that, many times. My old boss used to ask weekly what my work is. Think it was one of their ways to annoy me, or maybe they were just exceptionally stupid. Could never work out which.

Now I tell them what I have to do, and get told 'yeah but you are managing and I've never had complaints about your work, only hear good things'. So unless I start deliberately screwing up, which I can't do without causing myself more anxiety, there isn't much I can do.