To send the dc to her mum's?

[hotstepper4]

I have a friend who is pregnant with her fourth child. She is a single parent, this is relevant.

She went into hospital yesterday morning to be induced as she has gestational diabetes. The baby still isn't born.

She has had 3 quick inductions beforehand, this one is obviously more difficult.

I volunteered to look after her 3 dc while she went into hospital, one is in their early twenties so it's just the 12 and 4 year old.

She would have had the 2 younger dc stay with her dm while she was in hospital but the 4 yo hates his gran for some reason, and I thought my friend would be home by Friday evening. This is now not going to happen.

I'm staying in their house. I miss my own home and dc. WIBU to ask their gran to pick them up on Saturday afternoon, and keep them until my friend leaves hosp?

Roses idea could work.

Can you not contact your friend before Saturday and ask what she wants you to do?

Just take them to your house, no?

Worra yes possible. I'm seeing their gran tomorrow actually as I don't drive so she's driving him to school. I'll talk to her about it.

What about the father? im assuming must be one somewhere for her to be pregnant! i dont think you should send them to dm esp as the younger one doesnt get on with her its only going to worry and add strain to your friend as she is in labour

Id take them to your house or send the 12 year old to granny and take the 4 year old home with you. The children sound like hard work a 4 year old hating granny 12 year old refusing to stay where told. Thsy need to know others have needs too.

YABVU
You offered to look after the kids. Labour isn't something that can be timed. Take them to your house or take your kids to her house even you just do that for the weekend.

Bloody hell. 12 year old "won't" go to your house. 4 year old "won't" go to his grandma's. Who are these tiny tyrants ruling the lives of adults???

Where are the fathers in all this? They should be involved.
Tell the 12 year old to do as they are told.

Take them to your house.
Get the granny to take your place at their house.
Stop being bullied by a 12 year old and a 4 year old.

You've actually got several options.

I did offer, I just, somewhat naively, didn't expect my friend to take 48 hours to give birth bless her 😂 it's just hard work, the kids don't know me very well and the youngest is very unsettled without his mum.

Help a friend out! She’s in labour and probably could do without worrying about where her children are.
You said you’d look after them, so do it until she’s had her baby.
Take the children to your house, make them feel happy and at home there so you can still be with your family.
You can’t change your plans now. Put yourself in her position.

No father's at all unfortunately!

I'm going to see how it goes, if there's still no sign of friend coming out by Saturday I'll take them back to mine, and the 12 yo can go to her grans if she prefers. Sorted!

Suck it up for a few days. You offered. I'm sure it's easier looking after them than it is having a prolonged, uncomfortable labour.

You said you'd help. Your friend needs to know you have her back when she is giving birth. Childcare should be the least of her worries right now.

But also, those kids sound like they need some boundaries too.

Who's looking after your DC OP?
I don't think YABU - it was friend who refused to address what should happen if it took longer.
The 12 year old doesn't get to decide you can't stay at yours with them.

They sound like over indulged spoiled brats. Twelve year old won’t go to your house, four year old doesn’t want to stay with granny and stupid mother is bringing yet more children into this mess.

I’d tell the children they’ll both do as they’re told and then ship them off to granny’s and wipe my hands of the lot of them tbh.

My dc are home with their dad.

The kids do sound as though they're ruling the roost there. Even the 21yr old could've offered to drop at least one night at work given the situation.

Still there's nothing you can do about that really.

I’d be the same. You’d be a saint not to be thinking you want to be getting home now. She’ll have her work cut out with 4 it seems so give until tomorrow maybe and reassess ?

Go home for the day tomorrow while they are in school, take them to see mum at weekend? I wouldn't split kids unless they are very friendly with yours. It's not for ever op.

The 21 yo won’t work every single night so could offer to help to give you respite. Suppose since they’re an adult it’s their prerogative though. I would do as PP’s have said and either send both to Gran’s (4 year old will get over it...) or take 4yo with you and 12yo goes to Gran’s.

my first (!!!) induction took 5 days to work - & long labour after that - than had issues after which meant a longer stay in hospital - induction doesn't mean quick instant labour! For your friends info each labour is as different as each baby! I think the idea of sending the older dc to grandma & taking younger to your place makes sense - & I don't think you are being difficult in wanting to go home to your family

Am I missing why she will be in until Sunday? I was induced on a Wednesday morning, went on the drip on Thursday afternoon, gave birth around 7,30 pm and was home by 1 a.m. Does the Gestational Diabetes change things?

It's only been one night - maybe hold off until tomorrow and then go with plan B!

Hold on- you’ve left your own young family at home in order to facilitate two spoilt 4 and 12 year olds?

I’d give them the option to come back to mine, or straight to granny’s house.

Not one solitary father - with 4 kids? Perhaps she needs to review her contraception....

Give it until the weekend and see how things are going then.