To tell her to sod off?

[Thepinkyponk]

Member of my family isn't very good with technology (but cant be bothered to learn how to do things themselves) so they regularly ask me to do it all for them.

Example: looking up telephone numbers and email addresses for companies online which would take them 10 seconds to do, setting up a new phone, showing them how to install apps, printing photographs at kiosks or other simple tasks which regularly crop up on a weekly basis.

I'm 6 months pregnant, have painful SPD so struggle to walk very far at the moment which they know. I also have a toddler at home.

I've been asked to meet them in town which is 30 minute bus ride away, drag DS out in the cold needlessly to print some pictures off their phone in boots because apparently it's easier to get me to do it than ask for help in store.

I haven't responded yet.

AIBU to think this is pure cheek and tell them to sod off.

Look I would start declining her invitations to meet her, as you know there will be an ulterior motive, anyway, you will have two young kids of your own soon, so they will be your priority, not lazy aunt.

I do turn down the vast majority of invitations to meet up these days, then she feels sorry for herself and wonders why. It doesn't occur to her that it's her behaviour driving people away.

Have a chat with her. Remid her that you are massively pg, have a toddler, are in constant pain. You can't just jump on a bus any more, you have to ctach the toddler, wrestle her into a coat and shoes, and yourself (and how hard is to get shoes on when you have a massiebump in the way!), then you have to get to bus stop and stand waiting for it when standing is agony andehausting, all the while tryng to keep toddler from running into the road etc etc etc, lay it on relly thick. Say you're hay to meet her in town if you're going in for other things, but can' just jump up and get there without lots of planning.

That's absolutely spot on @Jus

Its hard enough getting out and about with a toddler and big bump to do important stuff, let alone running around helping other people with their admin.

She doesn't have children (through choice -
never wanted any) so underestimates how tiring pregnancy and motherhood can be.

I don't remember the last time I was able to quickly pop my shoes on and be out the house within five minutes

If you don't want to be confrontational about it, can you suggest some kind of local class to her? Apple Stores do a lot of free workshops if you have an iPad or similar and there's those Barclays Life Skills classes.

I agree she's been enabled for a long time so expects it as standard now

Well done on recognising this; it's only when you do that you can start to make changes

Her response to not getting her own way was very rude and of course she'll try again, but keep it up and she'll find someone else to pester - and if she sulks about it that's her affair

FWIW I'm the same age and pretty awful with tech myself. The difference is that I ask the professionals for help first, paying if necessary, and only bother others if I have absolutely no choice in an emergency ... and even then I make sure they know how grateful I am