To ask for opinions on ‘medicalised’vs ‘natural’ birth?

[birdonawire1]

Read so many stories of mismanaged births, CTG not read correctly, babies not monitored and damaged and then read romanticised stories all about the perfect ‘natural’ birth.

It seems very polarised so what do people think really?

My first birth was vaginal, baby was fine and I healed from the episiotomy fairly quickly. But I was horrified by the whole experience.

I opted for a ECS second time around and it was a perfect birth in comparison. Totally anecdotal, but I also successfully breastfed whereas after my first baby I was that traumatised I struggled with everything.

I strongly believe in informed maternal choice.

I also agree with everything Comeymemo has said.

The best birth is very dependent on you. Some people's perfect birth will be a c section, some an epidural, some just gas and air.
Look at your options and have a think about what you want.

I would also say be careful about planning too much or writing too detailed a birth plan. Babies come how they want, they haven't read your notes. Know what you want, but be prepared to be flexible if needed. Don't put unnecessary pressure on yourself for everything to be a certain way as it very possibly won't go that way. As long as both you and baby are ok after, that's the main thing.

Hospital.

I had a birthing plan for DD1. Was supposed to have a lovely water birth, no drugs etc. In the end I had to go be induced as my contractions stopped, I had an epidural and nearly needed an emergency CS. I didn't bother making a plan the second time round. I have 2 healthy DCs and how they got here is irrelevant to me now.

What I'd love to know is why so many people see a natural birth as the ideal when they'd wince at a natural tooth extraction or natural bone reset.

Seline , cause they see it as some sort of a spiritual thing where your soul is floating somewhere in outer space, traversing galaxies in connection with their ancestral mothers in the mystical power of womanhood.

Or something like that.

And apparently the pain of childbirth is some sort of a 'good' pain that helps bond with baby.

Or something like that.

Then again, to each their own - it is not my place to tell any woman how to give birth to her child. You go girl, whatever makes you happy, whatever gives you a good experience. I'd be very grateful if the natural birth brigade didn't put down those of us who'd rather avoid the spiritual mystical agony and didn't push their views onto us, and didn't try to force us to go through it. Unfortunately, it happens far too often.

(and I gave birth vaginally and breastfed for many, many years. I just got tired of the crunchy mamas, once I realised that all they do is force their views upon other women and judge them harshly, with some sort of smug and completelly baseless superiority.)

Coffee

I think they're lucky to be able to have that naïvity. I never bought into it but after experiencing one of the rare yet potentially disastrous complications of childbirth (statistically DD, DS and I should have died), the illusion is well and truly shattered.

Maybe I just didn't eat enough organic quinoa!

(I fully respect someone's choice to give birth naturally but it's the idealisation of it I think is ridiculous).

Precisely - it's the idealisaton, romanticising and judginess that made me really, really run a mile from all of that crunchy stuff. :))

I was supposed to have a very managed birth with my first because of existing congenital heart problems of my own - hospital, close monitoring of me and baby from the first sign of contractions , epidural in case they had to switch to CS. It was sort of a relief to not have to make decisions about options, though an epidural would not have been my preference otherwise.

Except, of course, that’s not how it happened for a variety of reasons - a spectacular storm being one of them and have a very fast, deceptive first stage then slow and painful second being another- and I ended up with just some gas and air towards the end. Heart solid as a rock.

Second time, we all took a ‘let’s see how it goes, midwife led but easy access to theatre’ approach - again, I managed on some gas and air ( for a bouncing 9 1/2 lbs). Relatively natural.

An open mind as to what nature will throw at you and access to trustworthy care are what are more important than fixed ideals, I think - both for physical and psychological health.

I can't stand it either. There's no need for it and I can't be doing with it. It's the same with breastfeeding, thanks to the birth mentioned above I really struggled with breastfeeding and my milk never came in properly meaning after 10 weeks I had to put the DTs on formula. This isn't "sad", it's great that we live in a time where babies who would've starved have a safe available milk source.

Some people need to sort their lives out and stop taking credit for what is pure luck.

What worries me the most, Seline , is that the natural brigade put an awful lot of pressure on mothers, especially anxious first-time mothers, often young ones too, who have no idea what to expect. They get sucked into the natural movement, they end up having high expectations about what the 'perfect' birth should be like, and then if it doesn't go to plan, they feel like failures. I think the natural mothers have a lot to answer for when it comes to the mental health of mothers.

It doesn’t matter provided you and the baby make it out alive and well.

I have four DC and my safest birth was the elective caesarean by far. The natural pain relief free ones ended in PPH and with DC1 I soldiered through twelve hours of back to back contractions before I had an epidural. It wore off after around five hours and they couldn’t fix it so I was in agony again. His shoulders became stuck in the end so needed emergency forceps. Had an ELCS last time and it was the calmest experience out of the bunch.

Coffee precisely. One individual told me off for outlining the risks of a vaginal birth such as shoulder dystocia and cord accidents and when you may need medical attention such as stained liquor or contractions with no gap between, all of which can be emergencies, and said I was scaring pregnant women. I replied it was far more scary to find yourself in that situation with no knowledge that it could occur, no knowledge of what can be done about it and no knowledge of how to advocate for yourself.

@Comeymemo - often though it's women themselves who don't want an epidural and write this in their birth plan. It's then very hard to look after someone who is then demanding an epidural mid labour who has documented everywhere 'do not at any point listen when I say I want an epidural'. And it's also very difficult to look after someone who is exhausted, baby is in OP position and you know an epidural would do them a world of good and they don't want one because they feel they should do it without. Midiwives get bashed for witholding epidurals and for pushing them.
I personally didn't want an epidural because although the lower dose is used, often women are not able to move as freely - I've seen this daily when working - and my son wouldn't have come out on his own without me having to squat and change position alot at the end.

I had my baby five weeks ago. I was down for a home birth. Ended up with an emergency induction, meptid, epidural, forceps, episiotomy. Wouldn’t change a minute of it. The ‘cascade of intervention’ and medicalised birth that NCT and the natural birth book I’d bought cautioned against saved my baby’s life. I don’t regret a minute of my medicalised birth.

For me, having an epidural was the best possible decision I could have made - I was able to think clearly and enjoy the final hour of my labour and welcome my baby with a clear head.

Having been terrified of it first time around, I will elect for labour ward again next time.

As @HoustonBess suggests, my hospital had all of the natural stuff - bean bags and balls etc available on labour ward and my care was still entirely midwife led - I even spent some of my labour in a deep bath on the ward.

I gave birth at West Middlesex by the way. They were absolutely AMAZING in every way and every midwife I met deserves a medal.

And @seline AMEN on the breastfeeding! That’s almost worse than the natural birth narrative.

Thank god I had a community midwife who gave me advice based on her own experiences, not just pushing breastfeeding every possible moment. I felt like I needed permission to top up with formula to not feel like a failure. She put me right on that and it was definitely the right thing for us. My baby is a hungry monster!!

I just think there needs to be honesty and openness to help women make the best informed decisions for themselves, whether that is a home water birth or a planned maternal request c-section.
Whenever I read about the campaigns for human rights in childbirth and improving birth it’s not really a ‘natural va medicalised birth’ approach but just about women having access to non-bias information to make their own choices and being treated with respect and dignity.

I also believe women are individuals and you can’t really make sweeping statements and assumptions on birth. 2 women in the same situation will make different choices on their birth because they have different priorities and preferences. Treating each woman as an individual is a good first step to ensuring positive births.

I also read about one hospital (can’t remember where though) which had an area for the women who are told ‘not to come in’ but still don’t wish to stay at home. It was described as a cosy area with comfy chairs and beanbags and staffed by doulas rather than midwives. On the surface that sounds like a good idea, particularly for women who have quite a long drive to hospital and are anxious once labour starts.

There was nothing natural about my pregnancy ( other than conception) and the birth.
100% medicalised - child to NICU - now a strapping pre teen.

4 miscarriages and one live child

Complete success

Elective C Section here. Was wonderful. I chose it because I wanted a consultant led birth, I didn’t want the uncertainty of labour or the possibility of an emergency c section and I didn’t want them to use the line of “no anesthetist available” followed by “too far gone now for an epidural”.
I would have an elective c section every day of the week. It was a wonderful experience. I’m sure many people will say the same about a vaginal midwife led birth.

I had elective c section. It was awesome. Dignified, pain free, not stressful and I had a quick recovery. Giving zero fucks about anyone else’s opinion on it

A shit ton of women in less developed countries die every year, because they only have the option of ‘natural’ birth.

I fail to understand why we have natural/medical discussions about birth, but not about having your appendix out, or having a filling.

I fail to understand why we have natural/medical discussions about birth, but not about having your appendix out, or having a filling.

I've never understood this either.

Because women want a choice, that's why it is a discussion.

Of course women should have a choice but why anyone would choose natural is beyond me. They should have the right yo do so however.