To be absolutely stupid with excitement?!

[Thisnamechanger]

I come from a tiny family. The last baby in our family was me, 31 years ago.

Today is SILs due date. My wonderful DM died shortly after their wedding in 2016 and this feels like the first good thing to happen to our family since.

Help me out MN! I'm child free and I'm not sure I've ever ever held a baby on my life but I'm STUPIDLY excited about becoming and Auntie!!

Have text SIL and DBro and said I totally understand they may want days or weeks alone with DNorN before inviting visitors but that I've kept the diary clear for potential visits in January.

AM. so. EXCITED.

What shall I bring baby? And more importantly SIL?? Any idea for a nice present for a new Mum??

Arrrrrggghhhh!

I will definitely be helpful when I go over but unfortunately I live about 2 hours away so won't be able to pop and and offer regular support. She's got all her sisters and her DM nearby though and obviously DBro. And I'm sure even my grumpy old DF will spring into action when he/she comes.

Don’t wear strong perfumes / scents when you visit. I hated it when my newborn smelt like someone else’s perfume

Noted! I only wear the body shop grapefruit spirtz anyway but will leave off!

You may well be able to offer support over text / WhatsApp etc. Easier than phone calls in the early days.

Sorry, posted too early.
www.johnlewis.com/john-lewis-partners-baby-forest-friends-storage-bag-yellow/p3316102?sku=236972839&s_kwcid=2dx92700036550413072&tmad=c&tmcampid=2&gclsrc=aw.ds&&gclid=Cj0KCQiAvebhBRD5ARIsAIQUmnn8phhuh1YggO3xoHfMC9fldYB4etNPihM3Gf-sGQqL6ZHBLBiXBXYaAtSWEALw_wcB.
For Mum - nice lotions, chocolate, flowers, vouchers for treat to use in the future, food. Time for a chat/do some housework/ send food

Perfect! I got lovely big John Lewis voucher for my Christmas present too so I can pick out some smashing baby items!

@Thisnamechanger - I personally loved it. There was a definite split between gifts from parents v non parents. Baby gets A LOT of stuff and after childbirth and feeling like you've been booted in the fanjo for three days, someone remembering me and bringing me my own gifts made me weep like a baby (although that could have been the day 5 hormones...)

I'm also going to offer to come up and babysit further down the line so DSIL and DBRo can have a date night

Can you be my Aunty too?

A friend got us gro-bags which was a great gift as they're fairly pricey but so useful. We got millions of muslins (which on my phone autocorrects to Muslims ), blankets, comforters and bibs. I ended up giving some away to a local charity.

Gro bags? Am so ignorant I thought that's what you grew tomatoes in!!

When my baby was born, my sister in law bought me a pair of earrings with the baby’s birthstone. Was one of the most thoughtful presents I got - a treat just for me, but still with a nod to this amazing thing that had happened

I was also given a voucher for a haircut which was a very thoughtful gift.

Since you live so far away, perhaps you could order dinner for them a couple of times and it could be delivered. Coordinate this with her husband so it's a nice surprise.

LGFuad and Fantababy both great ideas!

Take food with you when you visit! You are going to be a great Auntie! With your budget I'd go for a sleepyhead pod if they don't have one I found it really useful! Although the best gift you can give a parent is sleep!

https://gro.co.uk/product/grobag-baby-sleep-bag/

That is such a lovely idea LGFuad. I have a necklace that was a gift when I had my first child and you have described the emotions behind it perfectly .

Since you live so far away, perhaps you could order dinner for them a couple of times and it could be delivered. Coordinate this with her husband so it's a nice surprise

Ooooh smashing idea! They love very rurally so choice would be limited but what a nice idea!

I was going to suggest a basket of goodies as well - smellies, chocolate, nice socks, baby clothes in different sizes, baby bubble bath etc

The present I remember (and we got loads for our baby) was a cupcake delivery just for us! There were 12 of all different flavours and it was an absolute godsend as by day 4 I had totally underestimated how starving hungry breastfeeding made me and how utterly essential cake is.

I now do the same for other new mums!

You've brought tears to my eyes - what a lovely gorgeous person you are!

I would have liked:

Some extravagant chocolates for me
Some lovely slippers and pyjamas for me
Someone I could trust to just hold and cuddle the baby while I had a shower - not leave the house and not try to tidy my house
Someone to take other dc but only briefly
A lovely blanket for dc
For people to visit briefly particularly people I didn't know v well
A good funny book to read while feeding
Some lovely oil for my face
An automatic rocking chair for dc

Lovely frozen meals (homemade or from Cook/Waitrose/M&S) and a selection of snacks to have when up feeding at night.

On a different (and hopefully not too depressing) note, I found becoming a mum incredibly hard. One of the hardest things was all the visitors being so excited and telling me how amazing it was and asking how excited I was too. I was totally exhausted and overwhelmed.

What would have been really helpful is for someone to say to me that it was ok if I was struggling and to acknowledge that it could be very difficult. I’m not saying go in on a complete downer but that would have really helped me and I now say it to all new parents that I know. After that then the excitement can resume .

Take food with you when you visit!

I will.
I DEF owe this to SIL. I distinctly remember in about the 6th week of sharing a 24 vigil at DMs bedside with DF and DBro, when she was dying, DF dropped me back at his at about 5am to get some sleep and I'd had about 2 hours sleep... And I realized DSIL had left us a shepherds pie in the fridge. I actually broke down in sheer gratitude. I wolfed two portions smothered in gravy and had two beers and actually felt human for an hour or two.

When I had my first my brother bought me loads of frozen meals from Cook, which are really good quality. I really appreciated that.

Second what the above poster said about perfume!! I love my MIL and I love her cuddling my little ones but they always coming back smelling of her (very strong) perfume, and when they were little babies that made me massively upset, must be a hormonal thing!