To be so anxious about new neighbours

[partypoopers]

I feel I need to explain first that I feel I have an oversensitivity to neighbour noise which started when I first moved out of home into a flat and had the most horrifically inconsiderate neighbour who had loud, night-long parties and ignored our requests to please be quieter - a complaint ended up going through the council formally, and she moved out shortly afterwards. I spent a long time in that flat feeling anxious and trapped, I had a mortgage so it wasn’t easy to just move. I now live in a private rented semi detached house with a thin party wall, lived here for 5 years. First neighbours were a lovely young professional couple and I barely heard them – just usual up and down the stairs, occasional talking and front/back doors being closed. Then had a woman and her young dd move in – I panicked when they arrived as was worried about noise and she has been noisier than the previous couple – more music, she’s very loudly spoken, there’s been late night door slamming, hearing her argue with her child, etc. But she has been lovely with it and we’ve chatted outside many times so I felt I could tolerate any noise. Her house has been empty for basically 6 months because she’s moved in with her partner and is waiting for her tenancy to expire which I think is in a couple of weeks. It’s been blissfully quiet the last 6 months, it’s been like having a detached property. I’m feeling quite anxious about getting new neighbours purely because I have no idea who I may end up with, how noisy they will be and how friendly/reasonable they will be. It’s something that is really stressing me out. I’m dreading the day I see new cars outside and new people arriving. Does anyone else get like this with new neighbours? How can I chill the hell out both while I wait for neighbours to arrive, and once I eventually see/hear they’ve moved in?

I’m stressed this weekend as know it’s only a matter of time before it’s all change and someone else moves in. Praying they are nice and friendly and reasonable and normal. My tenancy is yearly but I only signed in November so not a quick get out if it really is bad... I saw a detached house to let but it’s over another £100 a month than what I pay now (probably because it’s also 3 bedrooms, I only need 2) why are there no detached two beds around?

Feeling your stress op , it's horrid isn't it , in some ways depsite enjoying the quiet you just want it over and done with and to see what neighbours you get .
Hopefully you will be have lovely neighbours 🌺

@windydoggy exactly! Horrible as you just anticipate it. I have sent texts previously but I always assume they think I'm neurotic.

Op can you write a list of pros and cons about your house? thats what I do when I have bleak "I must move house asap" thoughts. It does help a tad!

They may well surprise you op!

We bought our house 7 years ago, we’re attatched to a council house so we’ve had neighbours come and go over the years. Our last neighbour was a lovely lady who’s children had all grown up (youngest were at college) and I barely heard anything from her except from her dog barking occasionally during the afternoon but it never bothered us.
One day she turned up on my doorstep to let me know she was moving somewhere closer to her work and I felt sick to my stomach! We had a few months living next to an empty house while it was being renovated and then I heard there was a family with 5 children moving in and I panicked, I have no problem with children making noise during the day, I have children too and they can’t be expected to be quiet when they’re playing but our first neighbours played music at stupid times during the night and I was worried it may happen again. They’ve lived next door for a while now and it’s like nobody lives there!! They’re so quiet, the only time I could hear them was New Year’s Eve which was understandable, I was worried for nothing!