My DH was assaulted at work oday

[Silentviolet]

My DH has learning difficulties. Over the past 6 years he has worked so hard and has been offered a job at a new company for better pay and better hours.

He's been in the job for less than a month and the guy who he is working with made it clear on the first day that he didn't want my DH working with him. The role was created for my DH so this guy has never had anyone working with him before.

My DH has been coming home saying this guy makes things difficult and makes remarks. Today he came home and said that he has been threatened and physically assaulted by this guy. My DH had made an error and thus guy flipped at him, shouting and swearing calling him fucking useless and told him to get out. When my DH told him to calm down the guy started pushing him repeatedly. My DH stood his ground and this guy pushed him really hard into the door.

My DH reported it and the guy was spoken to and made to apologise. My DH now doesn't want to go back but has to as we have 2 small Dc's and he can't afford to be out of work.

I am in a professional role and consider myself to conduct myself in a professional manner. My DH looks to me alot because of learning difficulties, especially when it comes to anything like this.

AIBU to schedule a meeting with the manager and go in to discuss this with him? Surely it's a sackable offence what this guy has done to my DH? They work so close together how can the trust be restored? I am SO angry by blood is pumping. Either calm me down or give me some mumsnetters please

That's gross misconduct. Were there any witnesses? Other than your DH?

Your DP needs to be writing this all down so he has dates etc.

Does the company know he has learning difficulties? Was it created specifically for your DP or was the role created and DP applied for it?

I’m so angry in your behalf. I honestly would have thought at minimum an assault would be a final written warning. Would your DP go to the police?

You definitely can't speak to the manager. His contract is between him and his employer. The only exception would be if you getting involved was part of reasonable adjustments (which I doubt would ever be the case). It would look very bad on your DH if you got involved.

What kind of learning difficulties does he have? Do his Co workers know about them? As pp's have said this is a hate crime. If I was assaulted at work I would expect the person who assaulted me to be sacked. Or definitely not have to work with that person again. By making your dh do this they are possibly not giving him any alternative but to leave. So then he's been forced out which is legally dodgy. Acas could offer some advice. This is an awful thing to happen and his work should take it more seriously.

As previous posters have said it is Gross Misconduct which is a sackable offence

He needs to raise a grievance with HR

Surely whether it’s a hate crime depends on whether the OP’s dh is disabled (not all learning difficulties would count as this) and whether this was a motivating factor in the assault.

You DH can submit a grievance about this. This may be disability discrimination if your has a disability and has disclosed it to the employer. This is important because if he was dismissed he could claim unfair dismissal, other he must have been there for two years. Citizens advice website has information on it here
The website includes links to organisations that can help. Note the deadline of 3 months less one day to go to ACAS.

Mencap also has information about bullying at work here
Each citizens advice bureau is different. Where I volunteer there are employment solicitors who do free half hour advice, but we also know of a couple of places in our city that offer more help. You could see what help or signposts your local office have.

If your DH has LD's he may well be protected under the Equality Act.

This assault is quite clearly disability discrimination, and for work to terminate his contract over it, even within probationary period, would be VERY bad for them.

He needs to take it further. I would report it to the police personally. You dont go to work to be assaulted and the guy being made to apologise and nothing more is ridiculous.

With a diagnosed disability, your OH is protected from discrimination on the grounds of it being a protected characteristic under the terms of the Equalities Act. They therefore cannot get rid of him on the grounds that he made a complaint, either, as that counts as victimisation under the same act. ACAS would be helpful.

I'd strongly suggest that, in addition to taking action over this, he joins the most appropriate union for his job for support in any subsequent situations.

I think you have the right idea in helping him take it further but do not whatever you do go in with him. Think of a suitable 'representative' even if you're channeling stuff through them.

Off topic but just out of interest what type of learning difficulty does he hae OP?

Probably because she loves him him jessstan?

In addition to what others have said (raising a grievance), I would get a copy of their bullying and harassment policy and grievance policy so you can understand the process - but you must act fast and raise it quickly. Wait too long and it won’t do you any favours, let it go and the bully will think he can do what he likes.

Please take this further, your dh colleague has behaved appalling but worse it has been allowed to escalate. This is not an isolated incident and next time it will be worse, of that I am certain

He should have been suspended there and then. What an arsehole. You need to take this all the way. Don’t let him get away with it.

Your DH may have LD but he's an adult man with a wife and a job.
Don't override him.
Support him to stand his ground of course, but don't interfere beyond what he wants or needs you to.

jesstan I don't understand what you mean when you say I can't help asking why someone like you is married to a man with learning difficulties.
Do you think that he can't possibly be lovable? Or an equal in the marriage?

People with learning difficulties are as lovable as anyone else but it is unusual for people who are intellectually so very different to get together in a permanent relationship.

I'm afraid there really is a certain perspective on this forum which is meek and mild and about not causing a fuss. So we get advice like "look for another job". Sod that.

Your DH's colleague committed an assault on a fellow employee; that should be instant dismissal; your DH should be making it clear to HR that they should be sacking the person who assaulted him. Read up on your rights (don't rely on internet forums to tell you); your DH should be entitled to someone to sit on any meeting with HR if he needs it, whether it's you or a union rep.

@jessstan2 I have Autism, are you saying people like me shouldn't be married?