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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To hate red trousers on men?

383 replies

abacucat · 05/01/2019 12:45

This seems to be a status marker meaning I am very posh, so it doesn't matter if I look like a total nob.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
14
MargueritaPink · 07/01/2019 08:29

Wrong abacucat. Every post by you and Limited just confirms your own narrow-minded prejudices. Has anyone apart from you even used the word "chav" for example?

As for "trashing" the thread- what nonsense. Your and Limited's obnoxious comments have been criticised. You posted in AIBU- Yes you are.

MargueritaPink · 07/01/2019 08:35

I do judge middle class, midde aged red trouser wearing men because in my experience, they have not been the kind of people I have tons in common with

Judge them as what? Being not like you?

LadyOfTheCanyon · 07/01/2019 08:52

Yes, being not like me.

I do have some friends that are not like me, but the vast majority are very much like me in terms of attitude, values, political leanings, age, education and so on. I say friends as meaning people I spend a lot of time with as opposed to aquaintances who I am perfect pleasant to and can chat with over the garden fence but know that I'm not taking the relationship any further.

My experiences with Middle class, middle aged red trouser wearing men is that they are right wing, politically and socially conservative with a small and a capital C. They have quite limited ideas about women and their place in their very traditional set ups. They are 'hail fellow well met' types.

I happily accept that a percentage of red trousered men are not like this, but enough of them have been to allow me to form this particular prejudice.

MargueritaPink · 07/01/2019 09:03

Wouldn't it be wonderful if everyone was just like you?

"Judge" is a rather loaded term to apply to identify someone is not like you.

Pa10ma · 07/01/2019 09:20

Lady - I agree with you that social markers do exist and we all respond to them to a greater or lesser extent. But apply any of your comments above to other groups in society and then read them back to yourself and hear how you sound. Eg. “I know I’m not taking the relationship any further with..,women in headscarves; men in rapper style designer gear; Sikhs in turbans; goths; women with the Croydon facelift; Arabic men; anyone in a sari...etc, etc. You would sound very narrow-minded, wouldn’t you? And I’m sure people who pride themselves in their heightened social conscience and “saying it like it is”, would be the first to be outraged about such comments. Not everybody sees life through your lens.

LadyOfTheCanyon · 07/01/2019 09:42

Pa10ma

I think you have misunderstood my post and conflated tow things -that I don't take relationships further with people who I deem are not 'like me' insofar as after a few chats I have established that we don't have a lot in common and who I won't gel with, and the possibility that those people would be Muslim, Sikhs, Indian, 'poor' etc.

It's perfectly possible to be, say, a Sikh who is left leaning and who likes World music and Mexican food (-subtext; we would get on and have lots to talk about-) or a woman with a Croydon Facelift (which is quite a loaded term in itself, although I see where you are coming from) who likes Romantic poetry and open water swimming (ditto).

What I am saying is that after having met some RTM they have (in my opinion) been people that I haven't wanted to take a friendship further with. I could also say this about people who, for example, dress in a certain way that identifies them as quite hardcore football fans. I'm not saying they are monsters, just that I judge based on my own experience and my feeling are in line with this. Nor am I saying that I am not aware of this and try and be as open minded as possible, just that ofetn, experience bears out my (let's call them) prejudices.

Pa10ma · 07/01/2019 09:54

Fair enough Lady, but this thread wasn’t started in that vein. It was “AIBU to hate...xxx?” Not “AIBU to find I have nothing in common with xxx persons?”

LadyOfTheCanyon · 07/01/2019 10:22

True. But threads move on and I find it interesting to explore the wider contexts. To be fair, the OP hates red trousers on men, not men who wear red trousers, and I think that's distinction which has split the thread.
Grin

katekat383 · 07/01/2019 10:24

Not all red trouser wearing men are middle aged either.🙄

LadyOfTheCanyon · 07/01/2019 10:43

That's right, I did mention that they are fashionable for younger men too.

Buster72 · 07/01/2019 11:17

OP, do you come here just to have your fears confirmed?
I have never owned any coloured trousers outside of khaki or black, but because it upsets you so I will be getting salmon pink strides today.

Bowchicawowow · 07/01/2019 11:33

I really think you won't actually do that Buster72 Grin

tellmewhenthespaceshiplands · 07/01/2019 11:54

OP totally agree the massive equality in this country is shameful but starting a random thread making assumptions about red trouser wearing chaps is a bizarre way of objecting to it Confused

And FWIW any thread I've read ripping so called "chavs" for their clothing choices get launched upon pretty quickly for being nasty. This is an Internet forum so there will always be ignorant, rude and mean posters from all ends of the class structure. 'Tis not worth getting ones petticoat in a twist over

thetemptationofchocolate · 07/01/2019 12:08

I have a pair of red trousers - they are really loud in colour but I like them. I have got them on today because I needed cheering up on a grey Monday morning. But I am not a man so hopefully I will be forgiven this :)

tiggerkid · 07/01/2019 13:52

This post really made me laugh. My neighbour loves different colour trousers including red :) I don't think I should be sharing this post with him though!

tiggerkid · 07/01/2019 13:54

katekat383 I would agree with that. My next door neighbour is long past his middle age! I think he is quite close to 70 already and still wears red and any other colour that's going! He is a lovely guy though Grin

tiggerkid · 07/01/2019 14:19

Why do certain people wear tracksuits and pyjamas out and about? Is that a deliberate status marker too?

While wearing pyjamas outside may not be a status marker, it certainly does not do any favours for the person choosing to do that. I once took my son to his music lesson and the mum, who brought her daughter in for her lesson before my son's, was wearing her pyjamas, which meant that not only did she travel to the tutor's house in them but also felt no sense of embarrassment to sit through the lesson in her PJs.

Now, people may start making all sorts of excuses for the woman (she was in a rush, she washed all her other clothes, etc. etc) but whatever the excuse I can think of, none of them have anything to do with money or status. However many of them, unfortunately, do not give a favourable impression of the person even if they may be seen as perfectly valid.

limitedperiodonly · 07/01/2019 18:40

Wouldn't it be wonderful if everyone was just like you?

As opposed to being just like you , MargueritaPink?

MargueritaPink · 07/01/2019 18:55

Not at all Limited although I can't see what is wrong with being some one who doesn't sneer, mock and laugh at other people just because of what they are wearing. Unlike you.

Still waiting to hear what was so "funny" about the Harrods photographs? Especially the one of the young woman wearing a headscarf who clearly did not want to be photographe. Do you spend a lot of time laughing at people like her and at "funny" older people?

limitedperiodonly · 07/01/2019 19:32

I can't say I spend a lot of time laughing at people, but I do set aside a portion of my day to doing it. Guess what I'm doing now MargueritaPink?

MargueritaPink · 07/01/2019 19:46

You still can't explain what was so "funny" and not normal about those photographs.

It shouldn't be difficult- you clearly thought they were so "funny" they were worth bringing to everyone's attention. You invited other posters to think they were "funny" . You queried whether the subjects were "normal"

What was so funny about groups of veiled women, including one woman obviously unhappy at being photographed? What is so funny about photographs of older people?

I'm missing the joke - but tbh I really would not want to be the sort of person who thought those photographs were "funny"and tried to get other people to join in with her sniggering.

Screamqueenz · 07/01/2019 20:15

My DH is a "spring" season in colouring so red trousers look great on him, but definitely not mustard, that's for autumns.

limitedperiodonly · 07/01/2019 20:30

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

and repeat to fade

MargueritaPink · 07/01/2019 21:08

Still waiting for an answer Limited what is so funny about veiled women and older people?

After all you thought the photographs were so funny you had to share them. One other poster correctly called you out on your racism.

I suppose it's a bit more difficult to see yourself a racist and ageist rather than a social justice warrior.

Bowchicawowow · 07/01/2019 21:34

Give it a rest Margeurita. If you are so offended report the post and see what happens.