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AIBU?

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Original poster

Did they get a night off

155 replies

Blueblueyellow · 04/01/2019 21:41

I'm 32 my eldest sibling is 40,in all those 40 years my parents never had a night out. My OH can't belive this. We were poor and to me this is normal. Aibu or did your parents have a "night off".

OP posts:
Birdsgottafly · 04/01/2019 22:52

Both my Mum and Dad went out, in the 60/70/80's. My Dad was in the Merchant Navy and caught up with friends, in pubs and at car auctions.

My Mum loved to dance, ballroom, general, she'd dance past street entertainers Grin. She liked a drink, as well. She'd go out with work mates, friends and relatives. She did a few classes as well.

A lot of the women in the area we lived in, at least went to bingo.

I was minded by, a neighbour, my Nan and Grandad, elder Sister and an older Sister of my best friend, who minded a load of us together.

My Nan took me and my friends away on holiday to Wales.

SheCameFromGreeceSheHadaThirst · 04/01/2019 22:53

The first rule of goat club is.. you don’t talk about goat club

😂😂😂😂

Seren85 · 04/01/2019 22:56

Thinking about it, my parents went out rarely. I do remember being babysat once or twice by my Auntie or big cousin but they definitely didn't go out regularly. In the summer we sometimes went to the pub as a family after tea for a couple of hours. My Mum worked in a bar for years so was out at weekends and my Dad worked shifts in a factory and always says he gets enough time hanging around blokes every day so no need to go to the pub. They still go out rather infrequently, they're just home birds who enjoy each other's company although they do have the odd night out with other family and occasionally go to the theatre.

On the other hand, DH 's parents went out every weekend without fail and still enjoy regular nights out.

miltonroad · 04/01/2019 22:56

Mine did and we had sitters, they had some kind of babysitting rota with a circle of friends. Since having children, we haven’t had a night out, so about 28 years

cushionfiend · 04/01/2019 22:56

I’m not so sure that goat club was a typo now, I just googled and there are quite a lot of regional goat clubs in the U.K.!

Tartyflette · 04/01/2019 22:56

I had a strange quasi-colonial upbringing in the 60s in a middle eastern oil company town. Social life revolved around “the club” (for oil company employees) and my parents would be out every Monday evening for tombola, several nights a week at the outdoor cinema, regular dances and fancy dress do’s held by the various activity clubs they belonged to as well, eg a Desert Motoring Club that held rallies and treasure hunts, and a Boat Club at the beach.
We had nannies/ayah when we were very small but I recall going to the cinema with them from about the age of 8 or 9.
If anyone saw a series on TV last year about the British in Aden in the 60s (the Last Post , I think) the social life depicted was how it was. We werenk

MadCattery · 04/01/2019 22:57

Mine had six of us, 3-4 years apart average. They went out every Friday night, and the oldest had to babysit the younger ones.

Mummymummums · 04/01/2019 22:57

Mine did only once or twice during my childhood. I'm not that dissimilar myself - we don't have relatives who babysit. My DM has recently died but was ill before that, DF is very ill with dementia, and my in laws have never offered. The DC are 10 and 11 and 3-4 years ago we found an occasional local babysitter and we go out once or twice a year I think, at best. We mean to do more for ourselves but have been tied up with my parents.

BertieBotts · 04/01/2019 22:58

DH and I never go out, we got together when DS1 was 2 so he's always sort of been in the way. And now we live abroad and don't have family nearby so we still never go out. I think we have been on about three dates? DS1 is 10 now so we've been together 8 years, married for 5. We found a local babysitter once and went to the cinema, but it ended up costing so much for the babysitter plus cinema tickets plus mediocre meal and then parking that we hardly felt it worth the bother. We do enjoy each other's company! We just tend to sneak stuff in during the day or we leave DS1 on his own at the weekends now for an hour or two (not at night obv) or we sit down and do something on the sofa instead.

We do go out separately though, that's much more affordable somehow.

My mum hasn't been on a date in about 25 years, but I remember her going out with her friends.

GreenTulips · 04/01/2019 22:59

What happens in goat club stays in goat club

wonders how one sets one up

BertieBotts · 04/01/2019 22:59

Tarty that would be interesting, my dad was born there during that time. I'll have to mention the series to him.

Werve1 · 04/01/2019 23:00

I have to say that yes my parents did, My brother and I went to my mums parents every other weekend (half hour away) and in summer hols we went to my other grandparents for 4 weeks (down on the south coast) both my parents had full time jobs - not 9 - 5 so any help from family was needed.

Thesearmsofmine · 04/01/2019 23:00

Mine went out, due to my dads job they went to some award ceremony’s and also had nights out with friends.

SetPhasersTaeMalkie · 04/01/2019 23:02

My parents were out a lot when my dad was home on leave - dinner dances, dinner parties and socials. We had a few babysitters my parents really relied on as neither of them had any family leaving nearby.

I liked it. My mum had some fab long dresses(70s) and our babysitters brought us sweets.

The weirdest night was a safari dinner, where each course was at a different house and they all walked en masse to the next house.

Tartyflette · 04/01/2019 23:02

....posted too soon ...
We weren’t military but the series showed everyone enjoying social events at ‘the oil company club’ which was pretty much like ours.
But OTOH we had no TV! We listened to the BBC World Service for the news.

Silkei · 04/01/2019 23:06

My parents never went out together. DF went to the pub sometimes on a Saturday. DM went to the bingo at Christmas and occasionally had a meal with work colleagues. They divorced shortly after I went to uni aged 18. Perhaps because they basically had no relationship?

They did leave me ONCE with my aunt when I was about five and never did it again because apparently I “wouldn’t settle”. I remember it vividly. My aunt tried to make me go to bed at 8pm and I refused, because I didn’t see the point of going to bed when I knew full well that my parents were collecting me at 11pm and I’d just get woken up again. Or even worse, I was worried I wouldn’t get woken up and I’d be left there overnight. I didn’t feel comfortable going in her bed either. I said no thanks, I’ll just stay up and wait to be collected. Decades later DM still mentions this as the reason why she could never go out again. I still don’t see why it was an issue - to me it seems logical to want to wait up when you’re in someone else’s home and you know you’re being collected at a certain time?

paddlingwhenIshouldbeworking · 04/01/2019 23:08

Mine were very sociable. Always out and busy. Much much more than me and DH. We lived in the US for a few years and travelled back a lot after we returned and there life revolved around the country club and barbecues with other families. But Christmas was always in the UK and they were always out here too. Don't think they drank as much though so socialising didn't tire them out the way it does DH & I!

Bluntness100 · 04/01/2019 23:08

I wonder if this is us? We both travelled for work, so we never ever had a night out without our daughter, she always came with us or we didn't go. She's now 21 so it's different but growing up she never was left with a baby sitter once.

But we went out a lot, to restaurants, cinema, with friends etc. We just always took her. And if we couldn't we didn't go.

My own parents seldom. I would say two or three times I recall over the years. We also didn't really go out much as a family as we had no money.

Tartyflette · 04/01/2019 23:08

Bertie I enjoyed it, he might do too. There was due to be a 2nd series but the BBC cancelled it.
www.imdb.com/title/tt5133742/

Teacherlikemisstrunchball · 04/01/2019 23:09

My mum used to teach an evening class and my dad used to play badminton one night a week or do a round of golf. They went away once a year for a weekend with friends and our granny would come to look after us. Most of their weekend socialising was with their friends who also had children-and we would go with them too and play upstairs for HOURS and secretly watch dirty dancing on VHS and not tell my mum Grin

imarocketman50 · 04/01/2019 23:12

Wow my parents went out loads. At least once every couple of years they went on holiday without me and my sister and we had older relatives come and stay with us. We loved it as we got spoilt by them.

justgivemewine · 04/01/2019 23:12

Mine went out on a friday night every 2-3 weeks. Luckily they had a built in babysitter in my grandma who lived with us. My brother and i loved it because she let us stay up later than normal and eat sweets Grin

WitsEnding · 04/01/2019 23:15

In the 70s, my parents had one (both the same) night out every month - he went to Round Table, and she went to the Electrical Association for Women, which promoted the use of domestic appliances.

We occasionally went to local events as a family. If DF was employed (rather than self employed) there was also an Xmas night out.

I don't think this changed much after we grew up, unless they were away on holiday.

HowlsMovingBungalow · 04/01/2019 23:17

I spent most of my school holidays with my Grandmother who lived by the sea.

I presume this is when my mother had her own time.

Yet again I was dragged around the pubs when my step grandfather went awol after getting paid weekly to find him.

Am seeing my childhood for what it was via this thread - full of selfish cunts.

ContessaIsOnADietDammit · 04/01/2019 23:18

@CMOTDibbler

TELL US ABOUT GOAT CLUB DAMMIT