To start a thread about ridiculous trip advisor reviews?

[Coralnails]

I'm currently looking for a holiday so of course I'm reading trip adviser reviews.

I can't believe how many people leave poor reviews over the stupidest of things.

Quite a lot will leave bad reviews when they haven't even stayed at the place, but they've taken the hump because it was fully booked or a tour operator mixed up the bookings.

Or complaining about the weather, as if that's the hotels fault.

One that made me cry with laughter was the one who complained that no one spoke English well - in Spain.

Another left a hotel one star because they tv remote was faulty and they could hear someone from the kitchen putting the recycling out throughout the day. Apparently everything else was great, but they felt those two minor complaints warranted a terrible review.

I think Debs has a point.

I hope Daniel (who responded on behalf of the hotel) gave Debs a free evening at the hotel - it sounds an unpleasant experience. And that Michael and Gary got their backsides kicked

Couldn't resist reading some of the reviews for the Peacock, aghast

Just read @Suomynoa 's link also, sat on a train laughing to myself

I worked in a B&B and a couple of summers ago we were left a review saying that there were no screens on the windows and therefore a poisonous wolf spider got into the lady’s room, despite the fact that wolf spiders are indigenous to the United States. When this was pointed out by the owner, they lady tagged the B&B in every single Facebook story about poisonous spiders in the UK for about 3 months

Someone needs to give their experience of visiting Fortitude because judging by the TV series, people keep going there and dying and there is nothing on Trip Advisor about the place.

DebsDeliah's review is excellent- yes it goes into far too much detail but it is very useful for potential guests rather than funny. It sounds like a fucking shambles of a place and I'd be at least checking whether there were recent reviews saying things had massively improved before considering booking anywhere like that. And it would have to be a real value for money deal to take the risk, as those hotels are not cheap. They ought to be ashamed of themselves reading that.

I had a smile reading a review of an exquisitely lovely chateau in the south-west of France by someone who complained that there was no lift and she and her husband sat in their car for half an hour after going sightseeing because they couldn't face the antique stone staircase.
We went to stay in the chateau, and they'd installed a lift, so I guess the owners didn't find the guest's complaint as silly as I did.

I used to work as a Holiday rep
We could spot the ones who would be after a refund as soon as they got off the coach

There was a review of a restaurant in a local town complaining that the waitress was being exploited and the reviewer had reported them to trading standards. Turned out she started work at 10am but chose not to eat breakfast before work. She then worked until 3pm (5 whole hours) without a break and she'd then wait until her parents got home at 5 to eat dinner. So she hasn't eaten all day, through her own choice. Apparently warranted an outraged 1 star review...

This is a booking.com review for a B&B I stayed at recently, which is situated on a busy junction in the middle of Rome.

"Busy road, road noise at night and the ambulances! Ambulances run up and down this road and seem to like running their sirens"

Yes, damn those ambulance drivers, turning on their sirens and rushing up and down the road purely for shits and giggles

Meanwhile back on Trip Advisor in a different country...

"Crowded tours following over an hour ride in a cramped van"

Well those transport conditions are simply terrible. To have to spend literally one entire hour sitting on a real cloth-covered seat in a 'cramped van' holding only as many other people as there are seats....on your way to Auschwitz.

FFS

My favourite review is of a woman complaining about not being allowed to pet the donkeys in the New Forest. She actually thought the whole area was like a petting zoo. The warden who told her off did go overboard, but they are wild fucking animals ffs.

Donkeys are wild animals in the UK? Feral at most, surely, as they're not native.

There is a old war tunnel locally and someone left a one star review with the title ‘only if you like tunnels’ and that it was ‘dark’. Surely the title gave it away before booking

There is also a review for a local hotel where the customer gave it one star after being charged for ‘spilling water’. To which the manager replied with you were actually charged for leaving ‘bodily fluids’ on the walls. The mind boggles

To which the manager replied with you were actually charged for leaving ‘bodily fluids’ on the walls.

I feel sorry for the person who had to find out it was bodily fluids and not water. Yuk.

When checking into a hotel in Whitby a few years ago DH and I witnessed a man having a go at staff. Turned out the hotel was fully booked and he and his wife were in the accessible room. The staff told him that it was the biggest room, had the biggest walk in shower (all the rooms had showers so he wasn't disappointed about a bath) that it had a lovely view, but to no avail. He was furious and felt insulted because he wasn't disabled and he didn't want the disabled room. It took everything we both had not to go and call him a knob, but he was really big...! A member of staff also mentioned that they'd had complaints about the seagulls that day too!

Some ridiculous ones I've seen:
The beach slightly sloped up from the sea (1 star)

1 star review of a hotel because of a minor hiccup checking in at the departure airport and the flight was too long (how the hell is that the hotels fault??)

There was a gecko in the room one night (in the Caribbean)

People are nuts