Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I’ve done something incredibly stupid

101 replies

Massivemistake19 · 01/01/2019 15:50

I have name changed for this- partly because I am so ashamed.
In a moment of absolute madness at the age of 45, I tried a line of coke at a New Years party. I don’t know what the hell I was thinking as I have never done anything like it in my life before.
Now I feel devastated and so ashamed of myself - I have 2 kids and the thought that i could be so selfish has made me cry all day.

Aibu to ask for help and advise moving on from this- I feel so remorseful today and am also worried that I might have damaged my health.
I truly feel devastated by my idiocy

OP posts:
HellonHeels · 01/01/2019 17:13

You've just got the doom. It will wear off after a day or so. Get home, rest, drink water and eat nice food. It's not the end of the world.

Drinking alcohol or using coke is a bad idea for people with anxiety, it makes you feel worse (as you've discovered). Maybe knock off the booze and get some help for the anxiety if you don't feel better in a day or two.

Flowers
HellonHeels · 01/01/2019 17:16

Oh and if you Google some stats you'll see that almost 10% of adults in the UK have used coke at least once.

SuchAToDo · 01/01/2019 17:17

Op do you know what made you try the coke...was it friends pressuring you?...curiosity over something you hadn't tried before?..being too drunk to think about what you were doing ? ...too much stress and stuff in your personal life?..etc

What I mean is it might make you feel more better about the situation and more in control if you can figure out what happened to make you say yes...

If you can figure that out then you know what your trigger was that caused it to happen and you will be better prepared to avoid it even accidentally happening again

RatRolyPoly · 01/01/2019 17:17

Oh, you're definitely on a come down, I feel for you.

But, good news, that means there probably wasn't a lot of coke in your "coke"! It was probably MDMA

Mummyshark2018 · 01/01/2019 17:17

You've got hangover guilt and anxiety, where everything seems worse than it is. You'll wake up tomorrow feeling better and be able to move on. No permanent harm done.

KirstyAllsoppsFatterTwin · 01/01/2019 17:21

I can't help feeling that if you can't stop crying and pull yourself together, it's not the guilt that you did the coke, but an adverse reaction to the coke itself. Perhaps the experience wasn't quite as harmless as everyone is telling you it was.

Remember how you feel know and remember you don't want to feel like this a second time. Don't do it again. It's a fool's game. Plus coke turns everyone into boring, loud, self absorbed twats. Not a great look.

Original poster
Massivemistake19 · 01/01/2019 17:27

I have had a sugary tea, a sweet pastry and have warmed up w but. Feeling a tiny bit better but still feel a bit wired and jittery.

OP posts:
NotExactlyHappyToHelp · 01/01/2019 17:32

Don’t think of this as such a terrible thing. You’ve learned a decent lesson and you won’t do it again.

No harm has come to you or anyone else and it’ll never happen again.

We all make daft choices sometimes. Don’t be so hard on yourself Flowers.

SushiMonster · 01/01/2019 17:33

Jesus Christ why so drama lama about it?

You did a like. Your fine. You don’t want to do it again. No one else ever needs to know.

SushiMonster · 01/01/2019 17:34

You’re probably fucking hanging from the alcohol, not one little line.

Lovemusic33 · 01/01/2019 17:37

Stop beating yourself up about it, yes your a mother but your kids were not there and they won’t know what you did. Your on a come down which is the worst part about taking coke (it’s when a addict would just take more to get high again).

A lot of people have tried coke, taking it once doesn’t mean you have a drug problem, you were probably curious and the alchol gave you the confidence to take it, or you just wanted to join in with what others were doing?

You don’t plan on doing it again so it’s not really a problem.

Petalflowers · 01/01/2019 17:40

Everyone does something stupid once in a while.

Why did you decide to do? Was it alcohol induced? New year rebellion? Curiosity?

Miranda15110 · 01/01/2019 17:44

You experimented and didn't like how it made you feel. You know that it's not worth doing again as it made you feel terrible. Job done x

TopBitchoftheWitches · 01/01/2019 17:52

One line of coke would not give you this amount of anxiety.
Probably as pp said MDMA.

BlimeyCalmDown · 01/01/2019 18:04

Think you are maybe just having a come down/ emotional hangover. Distract yourself with netflix, get a good nights sleep and all will be better in the morning

CurlyhairedAssassin · 01/01/2019 18:05

I’m very anti-drugs for various reasons and it’s just not something that I would ever do, but even I don’t judge you! It was a mistake, you realise it, don’t worry.

However as others have said, I would maybe have a think about who I was associating with. I am 100% certain that the type of parties I go to these days that no-one takes coke! I would be shocked if someone was there and had some. Actually we’d probably have to leave so that would piss me off more than anything.

Auramigraine · 01/01/2019 18:10

Please try to calm down, you will be absolutely fine. Like others have said, chalk it down to experience and forget it ever happened. When I was younger, stupidly I took a pill, afterward taking it I saw how others reacted to it which scared me to death thinking how I would end up once it took effect but luckily I was just wide awake all night and I swore I would never do something so stupid again and I haven’t. Don’t worry x

Justaboy · 02/01/2019 00:11

Next time just blow some dope! But like all naughty drugs they aren't usually made in licensed pharma factories and the quality control leaves a LOT to be desired!.

Coldtoes28 · 02/01/2019 00:53

Blimey. Calm down! Was expecting something much more dramatic!

Calvinsmam · 02/01/2019 10:56

How are you feeling today OP?

birdiewoof · 02/01/2019 11:05

Everyone saying the OP is overreacting, making a big deal out of it.... clearly it is a big deal for her. It would be for me too. The only drugs I’ve ever done is weed as a teenager. Never anything as a mother, I would be mortified too. I think it’s rather sad that people don’t think it’s a big deal.

Hugs OP, I would feel the same Xx

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 02/01/2019 11:07

Jesus OP
You had a line
You won’t again

Move on and put behind you

Original poster
Massivemistake19 · 02/01/2019 11:08

@calvinsmam loads better funnily enough Grin

Thanks for all the comments yesterday- feeling a LOT less unhinged today after 12 hours sleep. Thankfully not back in work until next week either so a walk with the kids is on the cards today!

All your comments did really help yesterday- it helped me rationalise the doom!

OP posts:
DarlingNikita · 02/01/2019 11:24

No harm done and no judging from me (I've done more than a line in my time) and I'm glad you're feeling better.

Justaboy · 03/01/2019 20:42

DarlingNikita ??

Hello 'ello 'ello!, wotz all this here then?, you'll get arested doing that now you come quitely or the full arm of the MN posse law wilt come on ye;!.