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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Why is a trip to the walk-in centre a family outing?

340 replies

freeAnneBoleyn · 30/12/2018 13:30

For some?

I went yesterday. Looked full to bursting when I came in, not a single free chair. Looked to be a lot of families with one sick/injured member, with both parents and other children in attendance. Why? If you have two parents why in God’s name would you drag your other child to sit amongst lurgy ridden patients for four hours and have to worry about keeping them amused as well?!

I eventually got a chair when someone else got called up- I had a fractured shoulder it turned out so not desperately ill obviously but still in pain and was anticipating, correctly as it turned out, a very very long wait.

Worst was family of five opposite- one feverish looking child asleep on mum’s lap, two older children and a dad. He’d brought sweets and sandwiches for everyone but the kids were bored shitless which led to the inevitable handing over of a phone to mess around on with the horrible pingy sounds of the game they played audible to everyone. Another toddler was left to just roam about, and started running up and down.

It made for an even more unpleasant waiting experience for people who are in pain and sick, exposing healthy children to germs, and bloody boring for them too.

I am NOT judging any parent that had no choice to bring other children along, but if there are two of you...why do it??

OP posts:
SneakyGremlins · 30/12/2018 13:33

I have no idea. Last time I was in A+E there was a mum with three young children - I had sympathy for her, she obviously had no choice but to bring them all. But you don't need both parents and all children and sweets/snacks/drinks - it's not a picnic!

madmum5811 · 30/12/2018 13:36

I can beat that. a husband came in an ambulance, wife and kids in attendance in reception. They started complaining loudly that they were missing Corrie to the woman at the reception desk. Dad had a sprained thumb!!!

Original poster
freeAnneBoleyn · 30/12/2018 13:39

Blimey!!

Yeah I just thought it was so odd Confused

OP posts:
MyNameHasBeenTaken · 30/12/2018 13:45

I had to take rugby-playing ds twice in a week.
First time, managed to get sitter for dd.
Second time had to take her.
The amount of unattended small kids was unbelievable.
Dd is hard work (mental health issues) and even she could see she was better behaved than most of them.

On our most recent trip for ds (rugby again) dd fell down the last couple of stairs as we were leaving. So it was a real family outing.

But even as a single parent, I try to take the child that needs medical attention. And leave any others wherever I can.

purplelila2 · 30/12/2018 13:47

our walk in centre was in the town centre.
I had flu and a secondary sinus infection I wasn't in any fit state to drive myself and navigate a busy multi storey car park looking for spaces.

We have no family nearby therefore no one to care for my younger two who were 5 and 4 years old.

My husband had no choice but to bring them with us whilst we waited for me to be seen.

I was in no state to go on public transport and we don't have money to waste on cabs so what should we have done.

AndhowcouldIeverrefuse · 30/12/2018 13:50

Yes it's probably a combination of lack of transport and childcare - one adult is ill, the other has to drive them and take the kids with them as there is nobody to leave them with.

Theorising here as we don't have walk-ins- just GP or A&E.

SierraSmythe · 30/12/2018 13:53

I was in no state to go on public transport and we don't have money to waste on cabs so what should we have done.

Couldn't your DH have dropped you off and picked you up again when you'd been seen? Or taken the DC to walk around town while they waited? Why did they all have to wait in the walk-in centre with you?

MsTSwift · 30/12/2018 13:54

It’s weird.

Original poster
freeAnneBoleyn · 30/12/2018 13:56

purple in that case I would have thought maybe DH could have taken you and come back again?

OP posts:
SierraSmythe · 30/12/2018 13:56

I'm with you OP. I think it's awful that ill people can't even get a seat because they are taken up by so many family members. Also, having to put up with noisy games, kids running wild... I also wonder why people think that's acceptable for a medical centre.

Bringbackthestrioes · 30/12/2018 13:57

Maybe one parent needed to sit in the back with feverish child so the other had to drive and they had no one to look after the others. Or maybe the other parent is equally concerned about the sick one so wants to hear what the DR says & check the L.O is going to be ok.

NothingOnTellyAgain · 30/12/2018 13:59

There is no rule against people doing this?

A PP has explained why she did it > 1 car.
Now she's being told that her family must go and stand around in town by another poster.

Seems a bit weird to me.

I don't really pay so much attention to what other people are doing TBH. It all reminds me of my parents who would definitely be like this "why are they here? where do they live? which is ill? where are the grandparents? is that tehir car? his jacket needs a wash" etc etc etc

Annoying not to get a seat though. My bugbear for this was DHs in the ante natal clinic waiting room sitting down, and leaving heavily pregnant, possibly ill women standing! Another story though.

NothingOnTellyAgain · 30/12/2018 14:01

lol @ further posters demanding that PP who has done this explain herself immediately (and presumably realise the error of her ways,apologise etc)

Take a book next time.

I mean a dad brigning sandwiches and sweets > he knew there was going to be a wait. This is good isn't it.

When I had to take DD to A&E I stopped quickly for snacks, drinks, magazines as I knew it would prob be hours (in the end we went in v quick due to what was wrong but then we were on teh ward for hours so I was pleased of the forethought!).

PattiStanger · 30/12/2018 14:02

It's obvious that the op is talking about families where there is no need for all of them to be there, an anecdote about a time when they did all need to go isn't relevant.

Imo this is an aibu that would be pretty hard to find a justifiable reason for.

SierraSmythe · 30/12/2018 14:03

A PP has explained why she did it > 1 car. Now she's being told that her family must go and stand around in town by another poster. Seems a bit weird to me.

I didn't 'tell' PP what her family 'must' do. What an odd thing to say Hmm She asked what she should have done and I said there were other possibilities which didn't involve going on a family outing to the medical centre and taking up seats which should be for sick people. How is that weird??

Hubanmao · 30/12/2018 14:04

I suspect it’s the same mentality that makes the weekly supermarket shopping trip into a family outing.

(Like the OP im not judging families where circumstances mean they have to do this. It’s the ones who choose to turn these events into a whole family affair. And yes some people really do this.)

NothingOnTellyAgain · 30/12/2018 14:04

There is no need for a "justifiable reason".

There is no rule against the famiyl going to A&E with a hurt person.

For sure it is not a good idea to say you're only allowed to bring other people if you can justify it to staff.

OP has no idea why all those people were there she just wanted them out. She has no idea of their circs.

Maybe they are just the sort of families that do stuff together, for good or for bad.

SierraSmythe · 30/12/2018 14:07

There is no rule against the famiyl going to A&E with a hurt person.

There is no rule against doing many things but most people try to act in a way that isn't detrimental to others because not doing so makes them quite selfish IMO.

NothingOnTellyAgain · 30/12/2018 14:07

Hubanmao

I have a friend who does this. her 3 kids are extremely, um, lively as well!

I think she's mad. I've said how about shopping online saves the time etc but she says no no we all go to supermarket.
I've not really thought about it before but maybe it's a time that they are all together out the house or something. Doing something (even if it's not something I would choose!).

I don't really get this thing about paying so much attention to what strangers are doing though.

And also they will have their reasons for doing it and they aren't breaking any rules, so there we are. Their reasons may not be reasons that another person can understand, but they are their reasons and that's all there is to it really.

PlonkyPlink · 30/12/2018 14:07

I’m about to start a shift at a walk-in centre, it baffles me too. Huge families troop into the small consulting rooms, not enough space for everyone to sit, kids bored
and disruptive and start messing with my expensive and delicate equipment. It’s chaotic and unhelpful and makes the consultation difficult.

NothingOnTellyAgain · 30/12/2018 14:08

Oh lol Jesus Christ so now people who always take their family everywhere are selfish and detrimental to society Grin

MNers are such arseholes at times TBH.

PumpkinPie2016 · 30/12/2018 14:10

If people genuinely have no choice but to bring their children (like the last above who is single and had no help) then that is fine - nothing anyone can do.

However, two adults means you don't need to take everyone. The well adult drops off whoever is sick, goes home and returns when sick person is ready. Most people don't live miles and miles from the health care place.

It happens in A&E as well - whole families in attendance for one sick/injured person. There is really no need!

NothingOnTellyAgain · 30/12/2018 14:10

Why don't you all write to your hosp trusts saying that people entering with children (And it's children who are the issues here isn't it > otehr people's children are just such a PITA in most situations on MN > trains buses shops restaurants etc etc always about children on a parenting site lol) need to provide justification as to why the children should be allowed in as it's not a playground.

Chwaraeteg · 30/12/2018 14:11

In my family it's because my partner is the one who drives but I'm breastfeeding the baby. Therefore we both need to be there. We don't have anyone local to look after my older child so she would need to come too.

Lots of reasons I can imagine really. Not everyone has two parents (some parents may be ill themselves and may need accompanying), not everyone has on call childcare.

PristineCondition · 30/12/2018 14:12

Alternate view

Teen ds had an accident. Dp took him in, I have sezuires and had had many that week so couldn’t be left alone let alone with the 7 year old do whole family went to a and e

Yes I had better things to do blah blah
We are not some Neanderthal armhole family. Just unlucky health wise at the mo