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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Why is a trip to the walk-in centre a family outing?

340 replies

freeAnneBoleyn · 30/12/2018 13:30

For some?

I went yesterday. Looked full to bursting when I came in, not a single free chair. Looked to be a lot of families with one sick/injured member, with both parents and other children in attendance. Why? If you have two parents why in God’s name would you drag your other child to sit amongst lurgy ridden patients for four hours and have to worry about keeping them amused as well?!

I eventually got a chair when someone else got called up- I had a fractured shoulder it turned out so not desperately ill obviously but still in pain and was anticipating, correctly as it turned out, a very very long wait.

Worst was family of five opposite- one feverish looking child asleep on mum’s lap, two older children and a dad. He’d brought sweets and sandwiches for everyone but the kids were bored shitless which led to the inevitable handing over of a phone to mess around on with the horrible pingy sounds of the game they played audible to everyone. Another toddler was left to just roam about, and started running up and down.

It made for an even more unpleasant waiting experience for people who are in pain and sick, exposing healthy children to germs, and bloody boring for them too.

I am NOT judging any parent that had no choice to bring other children along, but if there are two of you...why do it??

OP posts:
Natsku · 30/12/2018 16:58

I did witness an entire family outing the other day. I thought at first they were visiting a family member in the ward upstairs but no, they all sat down in the waiting room. But my local health centre is always very quiet so it's no bother if the whole family chooses to come, there's always plenty of seats.
For us if it's DD then OH drops me and DD off and he takes the baby for a drive in the car until we're done (quiet place means no long waits either) and if it's the baby we leave DD at home and both come with the baby. But once I needed the doctor and OH had an appointment at the same time at another clinic so dropped me off and baby off at the health centre but I ended up needing an x-ray - could really have done with another family member to look after baby while I had the x-ray, instead the x-ray techs had to look after him!

Foslady · 30/12/2018 16:58

With you all the way OP when there is an alternative - and after last night’s fucking debacle with a family member that I had to get there don’t get me started when we ended up being the embarrassment. I stayed out of it and tidied up the play area and gathered up the waiting area rubbish when both areas cleared so at least one of us was being useful!

TroysMammy · 30/12/2018 17:02

I imagine it's a day out. I still don't understand why husband and wife both book a GP appointment together and go in with each other. Since the age of 16, now nearly 51, I have never been to the GP with my parents, husband, partners or friends in tow and I've never been to the GP with them either.

Spikeyball · 30/12/2018 17:10

With a husband and wife maybe one is a carer for the other or they are anticipating bad news or it is an issue such as fertility that concerns them both. We have done this when the appointment is about ds and he is not there with us. You are less likely to miss out details and are less likely to be fobbed off if there are two of you.

WhoAmIToDissABrie · 30/12/2018 17:47

I think perhaps that is why hospitals are quiet over xmas holidays

They aren’t.

Boxing Day is possibly the worst day of the year as all the patients that should have come in on Christmas Day turn up afterwards very ill. It’s great. Hmm

Longdistance · 30/12/2018 17:52

Just remembered from a time my dm had chemo about 10 years ago. We were waiting at the McMillan centre to go in. An older lady, who seemed to be the matriarch of the family was sat with at least 4 of her grown up grandchildren, and 2 others who were possibly her daughters.
She then declared she was taking them all out for afternoon tea at a posh hotel, which was met with lots of nodding and hand wringing.

TroysMammy · 30/12/2018 18:13

Spikeyball no they are not. Sometimes if one has phoned for the appointment the other is tagged on as an afterthought. They are regulars.

MommaL · 30/12/2018 18:13

I once took the family to a walk-in-center as I needed meds for a UTI that flared up on a Saturday and my wedding was on Tuesday, it was a bank holiday weekend and I wanted to get seen and then get on with last min wedding stuff. We walked to the walk-in-center an hour from home, then once I was seen, we went and did last min wedding stuff. It would have been a right ballache to have gone on my own, then go home and back out.

Sometimes it's just easier to all go then get on with the rest of the day.

MadameButterface · 30/12/2018 18:30

“An older lady, who seemed to be the matriarch of the family was sat with at least 4 of her grown up grandchildren, and 2 others who were possibly her daughters.
She then declared she was taking them all out for afternoon tea at a posh hotel, which was met with lots of nodding and hand wringing.”

Yeah what a selfish bitch, wanting to spend time with her dc and dgc in the middle of having chemo Hmm

makingmammaries · 30/12/2018 18:39

I’m with you, OP. Where I live the school has a really cramped corridor and the youngest kids have to be collected inside. Some families think BOTH parents have to go in to collect ONE child every sodding day and stand around taking up loads of space. Gives me the rage. Don’t any of them have jobs to go to?

knittedmouse · 30/12/2018 18:40

It's exciting for certain types of people. A trip out and a chance to have a nosey at others. They're usually the sort who visit the corner shop in huge pink fluffy dressing gowns and slippers and object loudly if you are seen before them.

brighteyeowl17 · 30/12/2018 18:42

My local one is often like something from Jeremy Kyle. I once saw a whole family
In pjs as well midday as well, they sat eating a Mac Donald’s, couldn’t work our what they were there for as kids running about, parents screaming.

ALongHardWinter · 30/12/2018 18:44

I've noticed this on the few occasions that I've been to A and E. I remember a couple of years ago when I was there that there was a girl,must have been about 14,who had what looked like her entire extended family with her. I reckoned that there was 9 people with her. When she was called through to be treated,every single one of them went with her. I bet the doctor loved them........

Beatitudes · 30/12/2018 18:45

@MadameButterface you haven't read Longdistance's post properly or have made assumptions to support your opinion.
Longdistance states her mother was in the middle of chemo; we can't assume that the Matriarch with 6 relatives in tow, was in the middle of chemotherapy too.

hazeyjane · 30/12/2018 18:49

I must admit I had similar thoughts to MmeButterface about Longdistance's post. It's perfectly logical to think the matriarch was having chemo too.

tillytoodles1 · 30/12/2018 18:50

I was in the Dr's recently and three woman, a man and two children came in. One of the children was called in, accompanied by one of the women while the others just sat in the waiting room. It was like a day out!

MoaningSickness · 30/12/2018 19:15

This thread is horrible. Lots of people need support when they are sick. Many of us don't have other people to look after the kids, so if one of us is sick and needs the other we all need to come in. The well parent can't drop off because we have no idea how long it will take, the medical center is not near anything, and in any case they need to be looking after the sick person.

And no, you can't tell by looking how I'll someone is. Last time as was at a walk in centre I would have appeared to just have a slight limp in one leg. It was a life threatening blood clot.

As for groceries, usually DH shops with the kids (to give me some alone time!), or we shop online, but sometimes we both want to go (because we each want to browse clothes/dvds, or we are picking new plates together etc), and if that happens we have to take everyone. Also, if we're both feeling knackered we will go together because it feels less of a chore to have adult company. Oh, or if we are all in the car on the way to/from somewhere and decide to stop on the way for food shopping to save time. Enough reasons?!

gamerwidow · 30/12/2018 19:23

These places have limited capacity and often involve waits of several hours. Taking the whole family should be an absolute last resort. Otherwise it’s rubbish for all the family who have to hang around for no good reason, it’s rubbish for everyone else because it takes up space which can be used by a sick person and it’s rubbish for the HCPs who have to try to manage to treat a patient with all the unnecessary extra bodies in the room. There will be extreme cases where you have to take everyone but this is not going to be true for most walk-in visits.

Pinkgrapefruit167 · 30/12/2018 19:35

Even when there are no kids involved, some grown men and women can’t do bloody anything without their partners in tow, like they are some kind of security blanket.

I had to go to the walk in centre yesterday morning for toddler DS who was being sick and a suspected ear infection. The place opened at 8, I got there at 8.02, by which point the waiting room was already full. Barely any kids, but just couples everywhere. I know they were they just for moral support as only one person of the couple was getting called up. People can’t do anything by themselves, not just walk in centres, it’s everywhere. The amount of people I see (usually bored men) who are getting dragged around the shops in town because you know they were forced to be there

MadameButterface · 30/12/2018 19:39

If yr at the place where they do chemo then it’s reasonable to assume that others in attendance are also there for chemo rather than just a fun day out no?

I am sorry about Longdistance’s mum but i think that the pp who mentioned that looking round and getting the irrational hump about others is what humans do when we’re stressed was bang on the money. No one goes to the hospital for fun.

OhMyGodTheyKilledKenny · 30/12/2018 20:09

Surely if you're going to hospital for chemo and are immunosuppressed you could do without being exposed to the combined germs of half a dozen extended family members of another patient who are crammed in the waiting room with them.

Beatitudes · 30/12/2018 20:43

I agree with you Ohmygodtheykilledkenny.
At the risk of being pedantic, McMillan centres offer a lot more treatment than just chemotherapy......

WhoAmIToDissABrie · 30/12/2018 20:46

When DH had chemo the waiting area was always full of people. I took DH for company and support as it was shit for both of us, and also because chemo makes you feel really unwell. Plus there was always lots of tea and biscuits. Wink

OhMyGodTheyKilledKenny · 30/12/2018 20:54

I totally get that if you're having chemo or a cancer related appointment you have one person with you (usually a partner or friend who has driven you there, is company, support and someone to take in information that you may miss) , in fact I've been there with a friend who is undergoing treatment for breast cancer... but to take 6 family members is crazy.
Imagine if everyone turned up with an entourage!

GunpowderGelatine · 30/12/2018 21:00

Well we can certainly tell from this thread which MNers turn every cumbersome activity into a family outing can't we Grin

I used to work for the NHS and IME a lot of the time the men can't cope at home with the kids alone so bring them along. I had instances of women staying in overnight at short notice (eg emergency gynae surgery) and baffled men asking me "but how am I meant to look after the kids" Hmm I always thought what on earth would happen if, heaven forbid, your wife dropped down dead tomorrow.

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