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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Why is a trip to the walk-in centre a family outing?

340 replies

freeAnneBoleyn · 30/12/2018 13:30

For some?

I went yesterday. Looked full to bursting when I came in, not a single free chair. Looked to be a lot of families with one sick/injured member, with both parents and other children in attendance. Why? If you have two parents why in God’s name would you drag your other child to sit amongst lurgy ridden patients for four hours and have to worry about keeping them amused as well?!

I eventually got a chair when someone else got called up- I had a fractured shoulder it turned out so not desperately ill obviously but still in pain and was anticipating, correctly as it turned out, a very very long wait.

Worst was family of five opposite- one feverish looking child asleep on mum’s lap, two older children and a dad. He’d brought sweets and sandwiches for everyone but the kids were bored shitless which led to the inevitable handing over of a phone to mess around on with the horrible pingy sounds of the game they played audible to everyone. Another toddler was left to just roam about, and started running up and down.

It made for an even more unpleasant waiting experience for people who are in pain and sick, exposing healthy children to germs, and bloody boring for them too.

I am NOT judging any parent that had no choice to bring other children along, but if there are two of you...why do it??

OP posts:
viques · 30/12/2018 14:36

I can understand parents with young children having to bring them/wanting to stay with a sick partner. But, and it is a huge but, in my limited A and E experience some people bring the entire family, additional adults, older mid / late teen children who then mooch around, taking up seats, leaving cups and snack wrappers in their wake and generally making everyone else's experience a whole lot worse.

I blame programmes like Casualty and 24 hours in A and E , that make A and E look like a warm cosy place to while away a few hours people watching, a bit like a shopping mall but with fewer fast food outlets.

TheQueef · 30/12/2018 14:36

Same here Spartacus I was taken by ambulance and had df with me. When we arrived we couldn't even have a bay (neither could the other ambulance patient with a badly broken ankle) because one family had 18 yep eighteen family members with them.

The staff spent so much time trying to shepherd them or coerce them in to the cafeteria (non English speaking apparently) to my pain addled brain it looked like a football crowd. My df counted them because he couldn't believe his eyes.
We also got told off, df was leaning on the bed because all the chairs were in the two bays this family had taken up.
The injured party (he was an adult) had burnt his leg on a motorcycle.

NothingOnTellyAgain · 30/12/2018 14:36

"I think you'll find you're the only one justifying it on here, everyone else is in agreement with OP! "

Sierra loads of posters have come on and told about a time they did this and given their reasons.

I've never done it myself > so I've not got any skin in this game, as it were.

StatisticallyChallenged · 30/12/2018 14:39

This was us at A&E a few weeks ago. Me, DH, 8 year old and baby. Folk bitching about bringing whole family, even though 8 year old was quiet (thanks to snack and tablet) and baby cried once in the 12 hours I was there.

In reality there was little choice. I got very ill in the middle of the night - too ill to contemplate driving (massive gallbladder attack, was removed 3 days later as it was v bad) and no ambulances available. So DH had to drive me. Baby was 5 weeks old and ebf so had to be with me, but I wasn't really well enough to care for her solo due to pain/morphine so he couldn't drop us. That leaves 8 year old, who had to come as we couldn't get hold of anyone at 3am.

I ended up at walk in 3 weeks before that too, infected c section wound. Same situation, I couldn't drive (too soon after section), baby needed to be with me, nobody to look after 8 year old.

Alienspaceship · 30/12/2018 14:40

Because some of us, some of us, only go if it’s a real emergency and we’re concerned enough about one of our children to actually go to a walk in centre - in which case we’re both there Smile

Coyoacan · 30/12/2018 14:41

I can think of lots of reasons why the whole family would want or need to accompany someone to A & E.

I live in Mexico. My dd took my dgd to the hospital the other day and wanted me to go for moral support. I went along but was stopped at the door because only one person is allowed to accompany the patient. All public hospitals here have that policy and it can be quite upsetting to see the families who have to stand and sometimes sleep outside a hospital because they have someone seriously ill inside.

regmover · 30/12/2018 14:42

Nothingontelly spectacular missing of point and possibly an issue with numbers? Partner in A+E with poorly person - 2 hopefully quiet adults. Family in A+E with poorly person - any number from 3 upwards and what's really upsetting people is the poor behaviour. Does that simplify things?

PookieDo · 30/12/2018 14:43

I sometimes cover in a place like this and the family outing element is absolutely baffling. Usually Nan comes along with mum and 2 walking DC and another in a giant pram

NothingOnTellyAgain · 30/12/2018 14:45

Not really

You said very clearly that if a person has a partner and 1 or more kids, the partner should leave with the kids and walk "somewhere"
You also said that your partner was invaluable with looking after you as you were so poorly

Therefore you believe that people with children should not get the invaluable care that you got from your partner. Purely becasue they have children.

Your partner took you outside so you would not be ill with the noise and got you when it was time.

A person with one or more kids would have had to stay inside and suffer the noise, because their partner should have left out of courtesy.

That is what your post said.

Maybe you just didn't think it through?

Sparkletastic · 30/12/2018 14:45

There is a strong 'tradition' of doing this in the traveller community. Particularly if the ill / injured person is a child.

NothingOnTellyAgain · 30/12/2018 14:46

Where are you getting 3+ kids from now?

You didn't mention a number before I don't think.

Original poster
freeAnneBoleyn · 30/12/2018 14:46

I wasn’t even talking about a&e though.

9/10, people in the walk in centre are there for a complete non-emergency. That is why they are at the walk in centre. Can’t wait for GP. Not a situation requiring an emergency department.

Thus, no need that I can see to bring your family along unless you e no other choice.

OP posts:
53rdWay · 30/12/2018 14:47

The families who bring 5 adults and 7 children along with the ill person surely aren't doing it because they're stumped for childcare. Why on earth would you want to keep a group of healthy children in a waiting room full of ill and possibly infectious people anyway?

Don't understand it in other parts of hospital either. I've shared the EPU waiting room with toddlers and babies before (one dad even helpfully put Bing on the TV which I'm sure everyone there appreciated Hmm), and families regularly bring half a dozen people to standard pregnancy ultrasounds at my hospital and then kick off when they're only allowed 1 or 2 other adults in the room.

PattiStanger · 30/12/2018 14:48

statisticallychallenged - the op isn't complaining about people like you, why aren't posters seeing that the problem is with family outings to walk in centres?

if you'd had this conversation with friends the most likely replies would be along the lines of, oh yes, it's pretty crap and a selfish way to carry on and really annoying but for some reason on here it has to become some kind of top trumps of who had the most valid reason to take an entourage to A & E

OhWotIsItThisTime · 30/12/2018 14:50

Ds2 had a severe cut that needed either stitches or glue. DH stayed at home with ds1.

But both of us can drive, plus we have each other and it was a child (as opposed to an adult needing another adult’s help).

In a&e there was an ill kid with extended family taking up all the chairs. So four adults with one child, plus a couple of kids that were fine. Now that is out of order.

NothingOnTellyAgain · 30/12/2018 14:50

"regmover

I can understand if there's only you and nobody to leave the kids with. That's it really. If your partner takes you they can leave you there and take the kids off somewhere. They don't have a car? Walk..."

Don't know where all this 3 plus kids stuff has come from.

The original post was as above.

coffeekittens · 30/12/2018 14:53

I totally get you OP, was in minor injuries (which is combined with our walk in) yesterday after falling down the stairs and there were no empty seats but lots of families with only one injured party and lots of people with the sniffles. Lots of disgruntled looks when I was called 10 minutes after checking in. The nurse who saw me said that they were very quiet Christmas Day as the people who would usually come to them for minor ailments such as colds or trapped fingers had better things to do with it being Christmas Day, SIL who works in A&E in a different trust said the same.

WhoGivesADamnForAFlakeyBandit · 30/12/2018 14:55

DD was in for day surgery recently. We had been sent clear pre-op written instructions about only 1 adult (who would not be fed) etc. The child in the bed opposite was one of 5 children and both her parents came as well. For the entire day. 7 people in 1 bay, one chair, one bed - that only the patient was allowed to sit on (apparently.)

Nottoberudebut · 30/12/2018 14:55

I just assume there must be a bloody good reason for dragging everyone along because no person would every choose to make a family outing of A&E!

Spikeyball · 30/12/2018 14:56

My son would need at least 2 adults with him in a hospital setting. We are just fortunate that we don't have any other children to consider.

OohLookAtThat · 30/12/2018 14:58

It’s when the entire extended family appear to turn up. Someone on the phone saying that the DC has broken his arm and before you know it all the aunts and uncles are there as if it’s a day out. Then they all want to come up to the ward and then are put out when we say no. Well, tough.

OhMyGodTheyKilledKenny · 30/12/2018 15:02

I've often thought it was strange to see whole families in A&E. The few times I've been it's never been somewhere you'd want a child to be unless they had to ie. they were the patient ( and then many A&E depts have seperate area for children waiting to be seen).

When I went with a broken ankle I was in the waiting room with a very unhappy prisoner handcuffed to a guard, someone who had taken an OD and was being very loud and vocal to friends on the phone about it and a selection of bleeding and vomiting (some drunk) people waiting to be triaged or taken through. Not a great place to take your entire family yet there were still a few including young children running around (when you're in a wheelchair with your foot stuck out due to a broken ankle the last thing you want is a couple of children running about nearby!!)

Bigpizzalover · 30/12/2018 15:02

I don’t even think the issue is all the family going for the one patient, as many PPs have said there’s plenty of reasons for everyone going along.... the problem is when all the family who are fit and well don’t stand to let a sick/injured person sit down. That’s when it becomes an issue in my opinion.

Spikeyball · 30/12/2018 15:03

I get that it is odd when extended families turn up but some people have mentioned just needing one adult with them and in some cases that simply isn't safe.

crimsonlake · 30/12/2018 15:07

I took my son to the walk in centre this morning very early, turns out he has Strep throat so we were actually seen as a priority thank god. So many people sitting there coughing, spluttering and sneezing, it would be the last place you would want to be taking children if possibly unavoidable. And yes there were some running up and down being annoying.