Not to send DD to Dads

[Cath2907]

Hubby and I split amicably in October. I’ve offered him 2 week nights, 1 weekend night and 1 day each weekend with DD. He has only taken Fri night and Sat morning then returned DD each week. He went 180 miles down South for Xmas and took DD Fri to Mon (Xmas eve) lunchtime. I met them halfway home to collect DD and he went back to his mums. We’d talked about DD maybe going down this weekend after Xmas for a few days but DD (aged 8) doesn’t want to. I’ve told hubby she doesn’t want to come (he asked if I was bringing her half way down tomorrow). He has refused to reply (I know he read the message) so is now in a mood (his sulking was one of the reasons we split!). AIBU not to insist DD goes down to visit again?

I'm assuming you both agreed to this at some point so yes yabu to turn around now and say DD doesn't want to and let her call all the shots I'm sure he is annoyed/disappointed and doesn't know how to respond. You know now in future that two trips in quick succession isn't ideal for her and you can plan around that but I don't find a 3-4 hour drive that bad tbh.

No I would not send her again. Your DD has already seen them over the holidays so there is no need to travel down again.

It is your DD's break as well, let her enjoy it doing what she wants.

YANBU
That's too much time on the road for an 8 year old.

Of course she'll also be enjoying her time with you and cousins more.

Not RT whole thread...but I wouldn't be forcing her.

There is too much thinking about the parents and not the child.